I LuV MySeLf!!!

fine..

2005-10-31T15:12:00.000+08:00

i'm quite forced to write this entry... but what a better way to start blogging all over again... cause aft the exams and my trip to bangkok (wait awhile for this entry yea? the photos take very long to upload and edit)... lazy me is rising up again... can't help it... but yea...

yesterday... went out with bev and jan... had loads of fun... haha... laughing and laughing and laughing even more... hahahahaha... okay... so i arrived at the club... got through the pesky security guards.. who were everywhere... sheesh!!! then went to eat yummy yummy cheesy potato wedges with them while they told me abt their exciting day... yea... and that was when i realized that bev could talk alot... and very good drama skills too... shouting and everything... and the 2 of them kept laughing at the waiter... i dunno why... try referin to jan or bev's blog... they should be able to explain it in more details... so aft the yummy food... we went to play b ball... yeah!!! the whole court to us and us only!!! till 2 china guys appeared... im sure their from china... they have that accent... but bev insists that they are from taiwan and fell for the cool guy in black... i would fall for that one also cuz the other was *bleahx*... yea... you get my meanin rite? but well.. i like neither... im neutral... wahaha... they then played tennis cuz we were in their way... or more of them in or way... but yea... who cares... jan said that they suck in tennis... of cuz they suck compared to ur andy roddick!!! then they got bored of it aft a ball that flew out of court which left us in stitches and abt another 10 shots of sucky tennis... so they came out to play b ball as we rested under the shade... suddenly jan and bev wanted to play tennis... so they went to ask if they could borrow their rackets... and aft much consideration... they agreed... and we had a great time playin until their mum came and we felt very bad and returned it to them... bev and jan tried sayin thank you... but to no avail... the boys were to dao... =( well.. so we went down to the gym.. happened to take the same lift as those two guys again... and when we were reachin our storey... the one in black started singing... it was so sudden and so amusing... the three of us held bck our laughs till we got out of the lift.... haha... super funny.. so we went to work out... bev ran on the threadmill while me and jan alternated between the cycling thingy, magazines and bev... oh... there was this super hot instructor there... oh my.. so macho... so manly... and oh my... his colonge... hubuh habuh!!! (okay... one of those spelling la.. take ur pick) nv mind... its impossible between us... haha... then we went to manzhu again to have a drinka nd hv some sandwhiches... that waiter was still there... he gave us the bill and even stood near the exit to smile at us when we left... hmmm... i think he has a crush on either jan or bev... haha... then we went to play b ball again... but there was this grp of 5 younger guys at the court playing... so we just sat at the side and watched this very pretty little ang moh girl playing tennis with her coach... soon the boys left... so we played with austin... this very cute small little boy... and super good in b ball... haha... and he was super nice too... kept helping us pick up our ball... soon.. a big sized guy with his big sized dad came with their silver ball... why so special one arh? aft awhile... a guy with his black ball came... which i would say was kinda dumb... cause the sky was already dark... how can you see the ball? lame la... if im not wrong.. it was also the ball which hit austin on the nose too... oh poor austin.. he was goin to cry... but that big sized guy told him in his very deep big sized voice smth like "be a man, be brave??" i can't remember... but it was super funny... and we all laughed as usual... austin sooned recovered and we left to go home... but jan's mum wasn't here yet... so we went to play 2 rounds of bowling... had 2 strikes in the first game... but lost everything in the second... i think i only had like 28 pts? haha.. so we left... bev and me walked to the bustop tgth... where she soon boarded her MERCEDES cab.... haha... is tt how you spell it? well.. yea... and thats also where i got harassed by some indian man who was saying smth like "aren't you goin to board the bus? faster... its going to leave soon.." in his on language of course... but it was damn freaky la... i didn't know what to do so i just pretended to not know anything and just ignored him... he gave up aft awhile... got onto the bus... still pretty traumatized... to find a cockroach flyin ard... and it actually flew on to the woman's hand... i was like? oh shit... should i go tell her... cuz i looks gross... and what if it was to lay eggs on her? ewww... double gross... but yea.. it soon flew off to nv be found again... but i was still quite paranoid and kept thinkin that horrible thing was somewhere on me... but thank god it wasn't...

=> the magical box is just right in front of you... just do it!!!

exams in 7 days time

2005-09-21T17:59:00.000+08:00

wheeee!!! the final year exams are in a weeks time and im here blogging... what the hell?!? only studied like 4 chaps of bio and one chap of history... nth else!!! i bet everyone else is mugging rite now... while i sit here and slack... well... at least we biscuits had some fun today catching fishy for our little pond... =) their all so cute and prettaye... and we gave them names!!! oh shit... i sound bimbotic... haha... i am rite? sam said so... just cause i said that jan was writing notes on her notes... whats wrong with notes on notes? she was doing that!! and i was just tellling you since you didn't know what she was doing... =P im soooo not bimbotic... im not prettaye enough to be one...

today was hokkien speaking day... and i guess 2mlw... and the day after 2mlw will still be hokkien speaking day... but yea... we had alot of fun trying to act like gangsters while improving our hokkien at the same time... haha.. jia pa bo dai ji zhou arh? kiam pa arh? ai xio pa... ke wah kao xio pa la!!!

"The Fruits Of Our Labour" Presents:
Banana Goolala
Pear Hair
Apple Freckle
Peach Beach/Bitch
Monkey Funky/Mangosteen
Strawberry Fury/Slut
ps: we are fruits!!! not veggies!!! fruits are sweeter... more colourful... loved and eaten by more kids... and we dun have sucky broccoli hairstyles!!!

my linky page still isn't done... i'll finish it up after the exams and ta dah!!! my linky page... ??? what am i saying?????

i have this heart shaped tattoo on my thigh which was done by dada when he came over yesterday... it was so ticklish... and i was studying my bio... so i couldn't concerntrate... probably thats why i can't remember a single thing i've read... but yea... that ass... made me meet him at bukit merah central... but he took the wrong bus... and ended up at tiong instead... so i had to take a bus there to meet him... and aft that... waited for him for an hour to play his games... before we went to great world city... the rabbits are sooo cute... i wanna get one... and dada was bullying the poor little hamster... meanie!!! then we went over to the newly renovated time zone... i wanted to play... but i did not want to buy the card... and dada didn't bring it... =( anyway... i stood there and watched this little boy vs these gangster in this car thingy game... omg... the little boy was soo pro... the game was very competitive.. as the gangster was good... and so was the boy... the boy overtook him... then the gangster overtook the boy and vice versa... i didn't know who won in the end... cause the gangster's frens and the little boy's butch sister was looking at me... so i quickly went off to find dada... went home aft tt...

watched heartlanders!!! omg... that timmy and the counsellor is sooo good looking!!! fanny looks quite pretty when her hair covers her face... but once its not... oops... i guess i was blinded for that one moment... even sam agrees with me... haha... then there was shooting stars... and this story abt olinda and that gorgeous looking toot is sooo much better than the taufik one... and daphne one... which i didn't bother to watch... waste of my time... i thought the sly one would be quite good cuz i thought the girl was fiona xie... but it turned out to be a fiona xie look-a-like-from-most-angles girl... but still quite nice... reminds me of jay chou and initial d... omg... i so got to watch initial d again... the seating arrangement the other time spoilt everything... it was so near the screen... my neck was breaking... and i sat next to someone... oh my... why him??? tian ah!! spolied the whole feel of the show... and kept shaking his leg and distracting me from my jay... ahhhh!!! so regret watching with them... or at least that guy only... he is like the biggest regret of my life other than not studying hard... i guess thats why we are not even frens now... wheee... thank god... hahaha... omg... olinda is gonna kiss TOOT next tues!!! omg... i can't wait!!!

sunday!!

2005-09-18T20:19:00.000+08:00

yeah!!! its sunday... wheeee~!!! but 2mlw got sch.... =( boohoo!!! not fun anymore... haiz... everyone has been mugging and what have i done... hmmm... let me think... 1 chap of history and 1 chap of bio... haha... quite good for me liao la... im not exactly the mugging type... =) had tuition today... and my tuition teacher was telling me abt this student of hers... omg... so scary... she is p6 this year... and she has like abt 5 tuitions a day... she also has 2 maths, 1 science, 2 chinese and 2 english tuition teachers... omg... how scary can that get? and she studies non stop... she wakes up at 5.30 and sleeps at 1am... MONSTER!!! she can also do finish 8 test papers in one lesson... omg!!! amazing... and utterly unforgivable... what kind of kid is this? okay... i wouldn't call her a kid... cause at such a young age... she is just as tall as my teacher... which is abt 170+? and just as busty as i am... damn it... so young... so tall.. so busty... damn damn damn... what kind of child is she??? thats why i told my teacher that if i ever had such a monsterous child... i'll throw her down the rubbish chute... =) yea... im not very motherly... val is the motherly one... im the mother hen look-a-like only... haha...

i've got the lastest issue of seventeen... yea... nice clothes... but sheesh... costly... those pretty pumps cause over a hundred... what the?!? day light robbery arh??? so yea... forget abt the pumps... went to the website that they introduced... and i saw this really prettaye charmed bracelet with a purple heart and a "love" sign... omg... gorgeous... i love it... i wanna get it... but i didn't know how to use the thingy... so yea... can't get it... shall go ask someone to teach me how to use it... =) yea... asked brandon if it was nice... and he said: "you wan is it?" diao... of cuz i want la... but i was just asking if you think it is nice... im not asking you to get it for me... oh ya... he said smth else too... shall not publish it or else you might regret it in the future... haha... well.. so yea... i want to get it... i will try get it... and i do not need anyone to get it for me.. heard me?! im independent... as my pinkaye bag says so... haha... but yea... ahhhhhhh... can't wait for the holidays!!! goin for classes... going to work... going to go play overnight again on my b day!!! yea!!! okay... i didn't really play last year... just walked abt with dada... but quite fun la... go and spy on all the couples... haha... and the scenary of the s'pore river was beautiful!!! we almost finished walking the whole river... haha... which is kind of impposible rite? but yea... im confused at what im typing too... but yea...

okay... im taking up paragraphing as amanda and jan has said that it makes my blog more readable as i type alot... and if it is in one whole chunk... its very tiresome to read the whole thing... =) okay... i went ice skating yesterday!!! wore a hideous oufit... which i bet was the laughing stock of the whole skating rink... but yea.. at least we had fun... even though i fell like 3 to 4 times.. and i skate very ugly... too bad for the ppl watching... while i was enjoying... but there were alot of cute guys and pretty girls over there... and the cute guys can really skate very well... they do what they call speed skating.. and its damn fast... but damn cool... i was like... omg... so cuteeee... and i just stood there staring with all the drool coming out of my mouth... okay... im exaggerating... but yea... okay... they aren't that cute.. but the way they skate... omg... sooo fast... and so agile... you wouldn't believe till you see it... haha... i shall frequent the place more often... yea... to embarrass myself and drool at guys at the same time... too bad there are lots of prettaye girls... so they wun take motice of me other than my hideous outfit... yea... i shall secretly admire them... =) took some pics with my new phone.. but i dunno how to load them in... so too bad... maybe you would have to wait till next year or even maybe ur next life to see it... but i dun think you would want to see it in the first place rite? =)

my elder sis has gone for... was it my cousin or my mother's cousin... but yea... that person's wedding... she is a indian-chinese.. and my mum says that she is very pretty... i dunno... i've not even heard of her before till my mum metioned abt her wedding... yea... so i did my sis's make up... turned out pretty good... till she put on some really hideous eye shadow which was i think red... ewww... okay.. partially my fault... but i did try to make it nice.. and it was nice... other then the fact that she didn't put foundation and alot of other stuff... so it didn't turn out as nice as it should... and we dun have right cosmetics... if we did have the right and good ones... i would surely and definitely turn out very nicely =) trust me can?

im in sch...

2005-09-12T14:56:00.000+08:00

hey hey... in sch bloggin now.. haha... there is jan on my right.. and amanda on my left (HELLO THERE!!!!)... so cool rite? all of us are like dunno doing what shit... haha... not supposed to be blogging or what shit here... but who cares... just be careful not to get caught... haha... today was the starting of the fourth and very last term... yes!!! hooorayyy!! finally... sch is gonna end... but smth horrible is blocking us at the end of this long dreadful road... EXAMS!! sheesh! why now? why not next year? the only problem to exams is... studying!!!... eww... who likes studying... yea.. i like studying... but mugging sucks... i hate to mug... thats probably why im failing pretty badly... but whats the point of mugging and memorising smth you would not need in the future... okay... maybe when you teach ur kids their homework later on in life... but our work is already so difficult.. what will our children be doing in primary sch in the future? bio? amaths? thats nuts!! thats why we might as well not have kids... and safe them from the torture of studying.. studying is really tormenting... not only to the mind... but also physically... im always so tired after sch... almost falling asleep as i sit down on the sofa... i dunno why... but studying always makes me want to sleep... i always fall aslp while studying.. so if i ever can't get to sleep.. yea.. studying is the best to do then... haha... yeah!!! im addicted to blogging again... feels good to get everything out... yeah!!! i feel so relieved... wheeee~ haha... yeah!!! i just got a jelly counter... so i know how many ppl have been visiting me... actually more of my blog... but yea.. crap... im bored... i told charmed that i wun be waiting for her... but yea... maybe i'll just wait... oh yea.. i sprained my neck.. it hurts when i turn to my left... sprained it while playing badminton with charmed and dada... oh... jeric joined us a little later.. dada says that i suck... no way!!! im quite good... just... yea... i sprained my neck... oh ya... dada has this new kinda funky hairdo... quite nice... really it does... stop touching it k? and okay... i'll get wax for you so you dun have to waste money on styling it with wax... yea... can i help you style then? please.... haha... well... yea... nice hair.. nice guy.. weird hairdresser... shall scan in his name card on the next entry... if i remember... haha... still soo early... dunno what to do... amanda wants me to go eat macs with her.. but im broke.. what shall i do? haha... im really bored... oh ya!!! IVAN PEH GHIM CHUAN!! or smth like that... your supposed to tag my board!!! i dun see it!!! *humph* ur dead the next time i see you online... haha... bored... bored.. bored... i sooo wish my turtle would be here with me now.. and my baby... and panda... and jacqueline aka my fav purple clownie blanky... brrrr~ im sooo cold... its freezing here... ohhhh~ i miss them alll already... shall go home... take pics off all of them and post it here... show off my precious babies to you... haha.. nth great abt them... other than their precious to me... yea.. so nvm... maybe when im free... gotta study hard... exams comin liao... but yea... as usual... talk only... no actions taken... haha... hahahahahahaha... amanda's makin some really funny tweet tweet sounds next to me now.. weird~ i guess she is bored too... why dun they allow msn messenger here!?! are they trying to bore us to death? i wanna play bejewel.. and talk to me frens!!! boohoo~! actually... wat am i doing here? i can just go home and use my own com.. crazy me... crazier amanda... she has just adopted three animals into her blog.. and still counting!!! i lost my pinkalily the hamster when i changed my template to this... *sob sob* shall try to get her back on soon... i promise pinkalily my hamster... yes.. i will... =) okay... its getting kinda dead in here now... gonna log off now... go and borrow some books to read... yeah! great idea... oh.. the library is gonna close anyway... yeah!!! HOME SWEET HOME.. and away from this freezing library... FOREVER!!! muahahaha!!! kidding.. i'll be back... for another chapter of... CHARLENE'S GREAT ADVENTURES: IN THE LIBRARY... haha... i'm totally crapping myself up... gtg... buai... =)

virus removed!!

2005-09-11T23:44:00.000+08:00

okay... i've got the music off... everything seems to be okay now.. no more virus i guess... oh ya... just realized that today is the sept 11... 4 years aft the sept 11 incident... saw the news just now... they are gonna rebuild the tower again... yea... good that they are setting everything else aside and starting anew... im sure their economy will recover very soon... God will do miracles on them... like how he did to soo many other ppl.. and im sure he will do miracles on my best fren too... hope she gets well soon... you know we all luv you... God luvs you... He will heal you... and you will recover in no time... everyone is praying for you... be brave k? i know you are... dun be scared... we will go through this together... God bless you... and we luv you <3

the actual post is below...

sch reopens!!!

2005-09-11T23:17:00.000+08:00

haiz... sch reopens 2mlw... and im not even half done with my holiday work... i can already imagine myself standing outside class absorbing in the nice morning sunshine and fresh fresh oxygen... hmmmm... sounds great rite? but i'll be rather lonely... maybe i shall start singing and dancing ard like a fool... yup... great idea to entertain myself... yea yea... im self consoling as usual... how else to keep that smile on my face to face the teachers... i surely dun wan them to report to the principal again... nonono.. no more double chin for me... haiz... my blog has some kind of virus.... so i guess no one would be coming in here till their com gets rid of the virus... i think its the music... shit-to-fied music... shall go get rid off it later... lets settle blogging first... well.. yesterday was my dearest charmaine's b day... yeah!!! but it was boring... cuz we had no where to go.. and nth to do... soon she fell aslp... but then woke up again to play com abt 15 mins later... brandon ah gong later came to use the com... his one crashed... but i just saw him online just awhile ago... sending me songs too.. thats quite a quick repair... well... so he came.. used the com... transferred some songs to my com... blogged... and off we went to burger king... supposed to study.. but i couldn't read with the one and only human cfc pollutant, brandon, over there... he kept burping and polluting the air with his cfc... he then offered me some of his hershey pie... but yea... i dun really like cfc polluted pies... so i refused that generous offer from mr kiam siap... haha... wah... i suan you until very jia lat sia... sorrie... haha... so you must listen to me and turn over a new leaf... so dun be so kiam siap and chase away all the girls... especially allison... haha... then we walked him to the station where he was meeting his frens to go to some club nearby to celebrate nevil's b day... hey... charmed and nevil are borned on the same day... but too bad it diff year... haha... we already took the long way there... but it seemed like we were still one of the first few to reach there... the rest only reached when we left... haha... nevil made me say happy b day to him twice... cuz he said that i didn't do it well enough the first time... and the second time he told me that i was too soft... luckily charmed help me shout happy b day to him and save me from saying it again... but i really think that its the thought that counts.. so saying once is just as good as saying it a million times... =) well... i really wanted to go along yesterday... but nevil didn't invite me =( and you need to be 18 to get it.. actually i dunno how old you need to get it... cuz brandon just asked if i was 16... and if i was... he could have brought me in yesterday... abit late rite? well... so charmed b day was a disaster.. but luckily my sister saved everything... even though abit late la... she bought a cake at the hotel opp my house... cuz it was past 12 midnight and obviously there was no where else selling cakes rite? haha... so she got this delicious mango mousse... and we dragged charmed out of bed... blowed the candles and let her open her gift from anderson.. ohhhh~ it was this big and very nicely illustrated bible story book... grace, my maid gave her a very nice skirt... and me? haha... i left her present in sch... how dumb rite? but nvm... im gonna get smth else for her... a little while later... need to save up first... haha... okay... mum's rushing me to go do finish my holiday assignments... which i wun... but i'll try... dun worry i'll go get the music off in awhile... so you all can enter here in peace... haha... Nites!!!

Andy: thanxs for telling me abt the virus... sorrie it got into ur com... and brandon was just playing with ur name.. dun blame him... anyway i didn't put it to heart.. too good to be true i guess =)
Brandon: cfc-pollutant!!!
Biscuits: i miss you all soooo much... can't wait to see all of you 2mlw!! *MuAcKs*

birthdays

2005-09-10T01:10:00.000+08:00

talking to brandon ah gong now...
give me a minute...

haha... okay... sorrie... took a little longer than a minute.. its been abt 1hr and 30 mins... haha... well... today... went out with jan, val and sam... val and sam came a little later so i met jan at cinni first... we ate at yoshi... and the beef bowl sucked... it used to be yummy.... but now... its like dry and yucky... well... at least the hardness of the vege remained the same... haha... then we saw this girl in green and yellow... yea! someone finally beat me in mismatched clothing... but i really dun think my pastel blue, pink and white is mismatched... quite sweet mah... maybe the shoes and the bag are a little mismatched.... probably cuz as what val had said... my shoes look like leopard skin... haha... nvm... who cares... then we went up to play cs... i totally sucked... until i quit the game and used another map... haha... yea jan... im such a loser... yea... the guy next to you said i was stupid... well... he is gay... he lost too anyway... this kind of ppl act pro only la... irritating... he kept making so much noise... oh ya... met gabriel there... my cutey little sea monster... haha... he sure is getting better and better looking each time... they stupid gay thought that jan is gabriel's sis... which is sam.. just because gabriel came to say hi to us... lame... oh... and guess what was my cs nick!!! haha... its........... ASSHOLE!!! haha... yea... jan kept scolding me an asshole after tt... haha... then val came... and we logged off and walked over to heeren... shopped for stuff... bought bubble tea... until sam came... then we took some really gay pics with the fossil robot... haha... after which... we just stood outside marche laughing at some neos... haha... haha.... hahaha.... walke dover to paragon to take some pics... walked into prada... ohhhhhh~ "sam... which boots do you think your mum would like?" "sam... did you remember to bring ur credit card?" "sam... are you sure your mum would like this?" haha... sam was soo embarrassed then she quickly walked out... haha... then we tried to take our reflection on this glass... sam took such a long time to get the correct options... and finally when she was done... i took the photo... and guess what... all we could see was the flash!! arghhh!!! we wanted to strangle her... haha... then we went over to far east... sam bought some really pretty underwear... and went to help her look for her skirt shop near some window and ice lemon tee... and when we finally found the shop... guess what again!!! there was no window... and no ice lemon tee too... arghhh~ sam is soo fustratingly cute... haha... soon we left for taka... cuz val kept on going "lets go taka now. lets go taka now.." haha... left them at the train station... and went down to yishun to meet my sis and cuzin... met them... tried to look for the cinema... but yea.. we couldn't find it... so we went to jurong point... to look for shark boy and lava girl... but yea... they didn't have it... so we watched the maid instead... oh my... its my second time watching the maid... everything was so expected.. yawnz... i was just stuffing myself with nachos... haha... i was laughing at all the funny parts but the whole cinema was so small and had so little ppl... i heard nobody laughing too... so they must all think im some weirdo... haha... well... we sent cuzin home after tt... her dad was smiling at me like dunno what... was my skirt too short or wat? haha... i dunno... so i quickly ran off... haha... took 960 to bugis and home... yea... home sweet home now... oh yea... heard that this woman's head was found in a bag or smth at orchard mrt station... and the body was found in some other place... eeeee... why are the ppl getting madder and madder... murdering is bad enough... why must chop up the body? so cruel.... this is like the 2nd case this year... hope it doesn't happen again... or else all our parents would just lock us all up at home... =(

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CHARMAINE!!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY NEVIL!!!

jay chou's mp3

2005-09-08T23:27:00.000+08:00

Jay Chou's JIII MP3 Player 512MB Swarovski Limited Edition!!! Only 2000 Pieces Worldwide!!! I want it!!!

Features:
1) Decode: MP3/WMA(PDDRM) format
2) 4-color OLED
3) Swarovski crystals at the panel, with Jay Chou's autograph engraved at the back. Mirror-feeling when power-off.
4) 2 new songs plus 3 original demo songs, with voice message specially recorded by Jay Chou.
5) Built-in Li-polymer battery for continuous playing up to 12 hrs.
6) Support music bit streams for CBR or VBR
7) Digital Voice Record (DVR)
8) Windows compatible file system as removable drives (FAT16/32)
9) ID3 information support multi-language (Chinese, English, European...)
10) ID3 tag display showing artist/song title/album
11) Playback sequence selection (normal, repeat, repeat all, random, random all)
12) FF/REW for content of single song or next/previous song selection
13) Sound equalizer (normal, jazz, classic, rock, pop, bass)
14) Selected content repeat function (A-Bmode)
15) Metal case
16) High-technology Nanometer class
17) Rapidly download speed through USB interface
18) FM radio and record
19) FM tuner including auto and manual searching channels
20) Line-in encode

Specifications:
1) OLED: 4-colours; 26x14mm
2) Size: 80x30x15mm
3) Weight: about 35 grams
4) Power: Rechargable battery (420mAh) (Charged through USB)
5) Data transferring interface: USB 2.0
6) Storage media: on-board flash memory 512Mbyte
7) Bit-rates: MP3 format 8~320kbps, WMA format 5~192kbps
8) S/N ratio: 90dB
9) Earphone O/P: Unique design earphones O/P
10) Frequency response: 20Hz~20Hz system

Requirements:
1) Windows 98/SE/ME/2000/XP or Mac OS 9.x and later
2) PC with USB port
3) 32MB system memory
4) 16MB free hard disk space (for uploading files)

Accessories:
1) Headphones
2) USB cable
3) Encode cable
4) Carrying bag
5) Installation CD
6) Quick guide
7) Cleaning cloth
8) Warranty card
9) Guarantee card for swarovski crystals

Its the coolest thing now... Get it or... Yea... Lose out... haha...

went out...

2005-09-08T11:21:00.000+08:00

yesterday... went out with mum to bugis... was supposed to just be the 2 of us.. but charmed just came back from camp just as i was entering the lift... she was dirty... itchy... and smelly... haha... she started crying when we reached home... saying that she misses my mum alot.. aww... why doesn't she miss me... well... so i had no choice but to bring her along after her bath... thank god she smells and looks alot better aft her bath... but there were rashes all over... haha... she is much better now... multi tasking by eating... reading archie comics and talking to me at the same time... well... so the three of us went out to bugis... bought a new skirt... super short... dunno how am i going to wear it... haha... bought a nice sparkling belt... a pair of heels... cuz my other heels are gonna break soon under my enormous pressure... hahaha... *hippo*... yea... i so wanna smack that asshole for that nick... we oso went for lunch at pasta mania... it was delicious!!! but sooo filling... haha... couldn't really walk after tt... haha... well... at ard 4... i left them to meet mel at meridian to play pool... but damn tt girl... so late... okay... maybe i was early... but we were supposed to meet at 5... and you came at ard 5.15? haiz.. anyway... in the mean time i walked ard ps... until i couldn't take it... cuz my heels were hurting my feet very much.. so i quickly walked to meridian and sat down, had grass jelly with longans and attap seeds.... everything except for the longans were nice... the longans were wrinkly and soft... next time i'll order without the longans... maybe i should bring my own... haha... kidding... so mel finally came... we went to the toilet... called sam if she wanted to join us... but she didn't... cuz she was with leon... then we went to monstercue... but mel lee here... wanted the table right at the back... but it was occupied... so she suggested to come back later... but of cuz we didn't... too tired too... so we walked to heeren... walked ard... took neoprints... had BITTER honeydew bubble tea... sick... so i threw it away in the end... then we went to paragon... went to walk ard metro... then we sat on the little merry-go-round to rest our tired feet... then we went to all the sports shop to see if i could find tennis balls... they had tennis balls... but i didn't have cash... haha... then we went to the basement... mel had tori-q... while i walked ard looking for smth to eat... but had no appetite for anything but ya-kun... too bad they dun have it in paragon... then mel persuaded me to go take a second round of neos... yea... so we walked backed to heeren... took neos... then we walked ard hmv... then slacked in the toilet... while mel lee tried to call mel lynn... but it was getting late... mel and me had to go home... and again... mel persuaded me to walk with her to take her bus behide taka... which i dun get why it is called taka by everyone.. when it actually is called ngee ann city... so why does everyone call it taka when most of ngee ann city isn't even taka... hmmm... nvm... back to the topic.. yea.. so we waited for her bus... took the bus to her house.. nonono... i dropped at quality hotel to stay over night in... haha.. kidding... i dropped to take a bus... and guess what... i was on the wrong side of the road... so when i passed by shaw centre... i quickly dropped off and called mel to scold her... but yea... she was too freaked out aft losing her ez-link card to be bothered by me... so i had to painfully walk across the road by the overhead bridge and wait for the bus to my house... and finally i reached home... yipee!!!

mel: you really should learn to say thank you more sincerely... remember!!! you owe me my sincere sorry when we go back to sch... =)

blooming chrysanthmums

2005-09-04T21:30:00.000+08:00

ohhhhhhhhh!!!~ guess what i guess saw!!! fireworks!!! pretty pretty fireworks!!! the yellow ones look like blooming chrysanthmums... hahahaha... wonder what they were for... hmmm... lantern festival? dun thinks its that time of the year yet rite? haha... well... at least i saw them... haha... brightens up the dark sky and me too!!! =) then there was derrick for jue dui superstar on that cenosis thingy... oh my... sooo cute!!! im fainting~ hahahaha... im not that weak hearted la... but he is really cute... saw him at bugis the other time... oh my.. i was practically goin to go forward and ask him for his number and stuff... but yea... im not that desperate... cute is cute... but love is another thing... haha... i wanted to join the star idol thingy... but i am underage... and i dun think my acting is that fabulous... it sucks actually... didn't know how i got into drama cca... the commiting suicide thingy wasn't very realistic... i guess i was just lucky cuz im not even in the syf thingy... some say its cuz we always pon... but how do you not pon when its soooooo bloody boring... and when there are these extra lessons or auditions in the holidays... nobody bother to contact us to tell us... only to leave us to go find out from our frens that they had already chosen the ppl for the part... haiz... dunno what wrong... maybe cuz we are naughty... but we truely aren't as notorious as other ppl from other schools... its just that our sch hasn't seen the worst... so we are the worst... so its kinda not fair rite? haiz... nobody would understand rite? all i can say is that nobody is perfect... so you can't expect us to be what you want us to be...

hi

2005-09-02T13:21:00.000+08:00

london.. paris... maybe tokyo!!!

haha... here i am... back in one piece... today was quite fun... even though i got a few scratches here and there during pe... guess what we did!!! we climb malcom park's hill... very very small hill... and oh my... all the poor little plants that we killed on the way up... didn't want to pull them out... but yea... thats the only way i could get up... and i was the last one struggling.... haha... what a joke... i kept sliding down... scraped my knees and elbows... *sob sob* haha... nvm... take it as a form of experience... if you still dun know what im talking abt... haha.. mrs b made us go to the park near our sch to run up and hill... more like crawl up... nonono... no stairs... just feet vs ground... oh my.. i was so dirty and muddy aft that... had to wash up for like 30 mins before i could allow myself to go for eng class... yea... so me and mel were very late for eng... but ms w didn't say anything... so thats quite good.. i got back my eng oral marks... got a low "b"
what the hell... i should at least a "b"... not a low "b"!!!! selfish ppl!!! =P yea... so we went back to class... went to the toilet to meet up with val and jan... val was in the toilet... and jan was... urmmm... using the hand dryer to dry her socks... aft that we went back to class... haha... then val wanted to go home... sam wanted to go home too... so we went to find mr t... mr t was such a nag... kept reminding them to get an mc if they want to leave and blah de blah... sam decided not to go home... so she and chantel sat at the stairs to the library while me and val went to back to class to get her bag... lao shi didn't say anything either... just nagged at val to do her holiday assignment... blah de blah... so to make the long story short... after sending val off... the three of us just slacked at the toilet... after awhile then did we decide to go back up... then i had my chinese oral... did quite okay... lao shi said that i was lucky to get such an easy passage... plzzzz... i could do just as well even if it was another passage, i think... haha... nvm.. then we had recess... dumb acs(i) ppl were here to promote some dumb concert of theirs again... =P then the ppl were here to flim the xiao xiao qi ye jia shit... haha... looks kinda lame... but hope they will win la... go sc!!! we went back for cme late as usual... ms w didn't say anything as usual too... i guess she is used to it.. as least she doesn't make our parents write letters to her to say that they know that we are always late unlike ms b.. humph! nvm.. its okay.. i didn't give her the letter... muhahahaha!!! now me, jan and chan are in the com lab... blogging, viewing pics and dunno do what shit with the com respectively... haha... waiting for honours day to start... which is at 3... oh my... so boring... i guess im going out later... yipee... hope i do... need new clothes... even though i just bought a few new shirts and skirts... well... there is no such thing as sufficient to girls i guess=)

blogging

2005-08-04T10:32:00.000+08:00

hey hey... look no further,baby im back!!! yeah!!! lol... everyone is complaining that i dun blog often enough... so im trying to blog now... happy???

oh... we found out who were the ones who stole things from our classmates... i was so shocked... didn't really suspect that it would be them... seems like we all trusted the wrong ppl... alot of teachers were quite shocked... for example ms A tan... she didn't know... until they were not there for her lesson yesterday... so she asked... and someone told her... we biscuits just kept quiet whenever any teacher askes abt what happened to them... we are not like some BMW who tells every single teacher... we are very disappointed that they did such stuff... very angry too... the teachers asked you all to stop it... why didn't you all stop?? we oso dun understand why did you all have to do it? if you all need help im sure those of our classmates that could help would help you all... especially yaya... she is so sad now la... haiz... now you all are being suspended for 7 days... mrs lim hopes that you all would realise ur mistake and come back to school new-ed... lets really hope that would happen...

We got back our test papers... did really badly for every sub... failed 5... only passed border lined for 2... dunno what to do... trying to study... so must encourage me to okay? haha... i think i did the worst in the class and the whole level... die die die die... must really try to get good grades liao... or else i'll have to retain... which i dun want to... haiz... i didn't even want to be in sc in the first place... didn't want to be in express stream... but suay suay lor... got 205 and got into sc... please la... i didn't even study... haiz... was hoping i would get into smss... i like their school uni... polka dots... and cuz my sis is from that school... they school seems like a better place to grow up and make frens in... sc is so stressful... and there are always these cold wars happening... bitching... gossiping... and all those rumors that spreads like a blazing fire in the forest... which i guess is quite fast la... and quite hard to stop... haiz... you should get what i mean la...

Yesterday we biscuits had lots of fun playing truth or dare... first it was val... who i dared to lift up her skirt in front of the whole class... and omg... she did it!!!! so proud of her... haha... i really tot ur underwear was yellow, val... was it really white?? haha... then next was jan who we dared her to either kiss sam on the lips or butt... she chose the lips... but took quite long for her to gu qi yong qi to kiss her... by that time... the most of our classmates were already looking... next it was yaya... and we dared her to pole dance... and omg... is she hot or what!?! *whistles* hahaha... then i forgot who was next... but yeah... we dared chan to kiss sam... and she took a really really long time to do it... yawns... but yeah... they did it in the end... then i was sam's turn which was some dare which i forgot... haha... well.. xinya had to do another pole dance but this time of jan... omg... you should have seen how red jan got... i told you yaya was hot... i bet jan was super turned on... haha... after everyone... the bottle still didn't spin to me... so they just made me do a dare... a dare to take off my shirt... wahahaha... guess what!?! i did it... and stupid chan wanted to see my front so she followed me to the corner of the class to remove my shirt... then the other biscuits followed along too... so i had to remove my shirt... but the class could only see my back... while my bicuits had to first class seatings to me removing my shirt... hahahaha... the last dare was val to kiss jan... they took quite a long time too... until amanda pushed their heads together.. and TA DAH!!! they kissed... yes yes.. jan jan was super red as usual... and guess who witnessed it... haha... she must have been fuming inside!!! haha....

After school... i happily went out to meet my mum at popular(orchard)... she bought me a eng and a chinese assesment... not as if im going to do but yeah... just for show... haha... then we meet my elder sis and younger sis... and we went out shopping... haha... forever 21 has soo many new and nice clothes... but damn ex... haha... we went to c&k and my mum bought me this black covered shoes... it was soo sweet... but size 6 was too tight and size 7 was to loose... in the end i got size 7 which didn't really fit... but yeah... haha... then we went to eat moss burger... yum yum!!! after that we went to taka's toy sale... got 2 tamagotchi but the other brand one... its called best friends i think... and we oso bought this organ for my music lovin charmed... haha... oh... and guess who i met there... our geo teacher!!! dunno whats her name... but yeah... saw her... and i faster hid cuz i was in my sch uni... and my shirt was tucked out... she seemed to be in a big rush so i dun think she saw me... haha... after that we went over to isetan... oh my... i fell in love with this lacey denim skirt and a purple mng jacket.. the skrt was abt 30 or 40 and the jacket was 55... haha... no money to buy... so pathetic... but dun worry... i'll be back soon to get you all... =) so dun get bought off k?

didn't go to school today... haha... so slack... it is still raining very heavily and its such a nice weather to fall asleep in but i woke up so early... sianz... my tamagotchi is not happy... its hungry and dirty... and it doesn't want to wake up... what to do???

tricked again

2005-07-23T22:55:00.000+08:00

As i was on my way home from church just now, i met my neighbours and their family. Grandfather, grandmother, son-in-law, daughter and three little grandchildren, a boy and 2 girls. The little boy was so adorable and so was the girls... i loved the way their eyes sparkled with innocence =) As we reached the 16 storey, we met another neighbour and his family, with two little cute boys. Another happy family, i thought. Then i thought of myself, having my own family and spending such quality time with them. But after disclosing that secret nothing will be the same again. I failed my job as a lover and let him down. And once again i trusted the wrong guy and im sure his impression of me is much worst now... What have i done to deserve this? Well... i can't blame anyone else for trusted that guy so easily... Just have to blame myself for being so gullible... But who could have thought that he was a wolf in sheeps clothing? Why didn't i suspect it in the first place? Why didn't i go with my initial instinct? Why did i lead myself further and further away? I have failed once again... I wonder if there is still any chance to go back to the past... Where everything was going so smoothly... I shouldn't have taken that step... Now i've fallen so deep and i dunno how to climb back up... Why must the person that i trusted so much betray me not once but twice, thrice... No words can describe how i feel... Why must one love, when it hurts so much???

im back

2005-07-14T16:39:00.000+08:00

yea... im back... haven't been blogging for quite some time... probably cuz nth interesting or inspiring enough to blog abt... nth interesting today too... its all just school school school and more school... so no life... but this wun be for long... two and a half months later... its our final year exams and yahoo!!!! free as a bird!!!! hahaha... well... lets start this entry with what happened for the last 2 weeks...

Youth Day (Monday)
>>Nothing much... went out... but forgot who i went out with... when somewhere i guess... nothing really interesting... maybe bought a few stuff here and there...

TuesDay
>>Jan Jan went off early for some swimming competition... blah!!! miss her soo much... but luckily she only went off only during recess... so its only like one or 2 lessons without her... but boring... had to much space to put my stuff... and no one to talk to and laugh with... haiz... was late for A math lesson... cuz miss tan allowed us to sleep for a minute before the next lesson... and she would come back to wake us up... but she didn't... so we were 20 mins late... oops!!! so she made us stay back for 20 mins to recover the time lost... but in the end she only took abt 10 mins... so its okay... haha... today i also bluffed a prefect that i got booked for wrong uniform already... but hehehe... yup... naughty me... *spank spank*

Wednesday
>>What an unlucky day... was gonna walk to where our class it when the bell rang so i had to stay at the side with the prefects... please la... i was already on my way in... why dun you all just let me in??? diao diao... and so unluckily that the prefect happen to see my big prettaye purple earrings... sad sad... she confiscated it even after all the presuading and lies... waste my time... but she was quite nice la... so its okay... then after recess... our biscuit gang + mel lee was late to go back to class as usual... and got stopped by mr ang... oh my... you should have heard him shout... he sounded so sissy and squeaky... haha... luckily chantel came out with all this lame ans or else we would have to stay there and listen to more of his nonsense... haha... after almost 10 mins... he finally let us go and yea... we were laughing the whole way back... hahahaha...

Thurday
>>Went out with dada... went to get new earrings... cuz my big prettaye purple ones got confiscated... diao diao... bought the same kind of earrings but white colour instead... oh my... what big prettaye white earrings!!!

Friday
>>Got back my big prettaye purple earrings... but one of them broke... *sob sob* wanted to ask the prefect to give me the money to buy new ones since she broke my big prettaye purple earrings... but she was nice... so never mind la... *sob sob* im still devastated by this loss till today... =(

Saturday
>>I went to church!!! yeah!!! it was so fun... and the surmon was inspiring... yes yes... you should go to city harvest... i brought dada along this time.. he enjoyed it alot too... and is looking forward to the next service =) but dunno when will i be able to go again =(

Sunday
>>Supposed to have tuition... but i slept right through it... she didn't even wake me up... she said that i was old enough to wake up without her hitting me like when i was in primary school... diao diao... then i forgot what happened after that... hehe...

Monday
>>Monday blues... so tired...

Birthdays (Tuesday)
>>Oh yes... it is finally melissa's bday... she has been waiting and reminding me off this day... she even wrote in my notebook to remind me... yea... its the pic up there... diao diao... it was yongzhi's bday too... woah... shuang xi ling men... hahaha... -__-" jan jan didn't come today... she had another stupid swimming competition... was soo bored... so lonely... =( but yea... today's pe was fun!!! we played smth like tennis... haha... i can see jan jan's face turning green with envy already... haha... yea yea chantel... sam's striped bra is nicer cuz there is green... but mine had diff shades of pink.. and a hot,hot pink bra strap... im so hurt... haha.... had emath test today... so difficult... so gonna fail...

Wednesday
>>Had hiccups the whole day... diao diao... went out with dada again... wanted to send him to the thai embassy one... but we walk and walk until forget liao... tsk tsk... too bad la... he was really looking forward to having his aching arm and legs chopped out and working as a begger at thailand... sorrie la... 'll get you another appointment with the embassy soon... had a math test today... i totally screwed it up... oh freak!!!

Thurday
>>Which is today... got back my e math paper... did better than i expected... but still fail... haha... but 2 digit leh... haha... today got scolded by mr ang... stupid faggot... scold me for my nails... even threatened to send me back home... ass... stupid miss beh la... keep booking me for my nails... i think got 4 bookings for nails liao... now i've got no nails liao.. sad sad... shall go get some fake ones first... i feel so bare without my nails... haiz... but stupid mr ang couldn't even see that i was wearing my big prettaye earrings on my second earhole on my left ear... blind ass... how do you be a dm like that??? and miss seah looked horrible... she used to be so bitchy and pretty... but with all the makeup now... haiz... she is not only bitchy but fugly too... tsk tsk.. poor girl... And Yea... my hiccups continued... and jan jan kept laughing... lame... but thanxs for the water... even though ur bottle stinks... haha... i ponned drama... too tired liao...

haha... can't wait for 2mlw!!! TGIF!!! Its the weekend!!!

finally... im blogging again

2005-06-12T11:36:00.000+08:00

hehehehe... finally im blogging again... been too lazy to blog for the past few months... but finally im bck to blog abt the miracle that has happened in my life... i just recieved salvation yesterday... and oh my... do i feel great... chc rocks... im goin to bring my frens there to get saved like i did... nonono... you can't escape... i'll call and iritate you everyday =P haha... last tues to thurs was the emerge conference that was just to inspiring and great to describe... if you have missed it... tsk tsk... poor thing... haha... but yea... i had lots of fun... the sermon was great... the cell was bonded... until yesterday of cuz... but yea... i believe that nothing is impossible with this EXTRAODINARY God... *whistles* haha... they are playing "behide this hazel eyes" now!!! wheeeeeeeeee!!! i could still remember how we biscuits were singing this song like mad on the day of the bazaar... it was fun even with all the chocolate and even though we couldn't sell all our sweets... but its okay... at least we had fun... can't wait to take out some time and go shopping at orchard, go catch a movie and just slack!!!! can't wait!!!

breakin down

2005-04-17T22:48:00.000+08:00

im gonna breakdown anytime now... i feel so sad... so so so sad... im trying to concerntrate on my studies to not think abt it but i can't... i just think abt him... will i ever get to let go of him? i hope so... i dun wan to go on like this the rest of my life... its hurts so badly... its all my fault... i shouldn't have done that... if i didn't do that.. you would not have broken up with me... but its no use for all this now rite? its been almost 6 months since we broke up... but im still missin you so badly... i guess you dun miss me rite? you have a nice and pretty gf... i guess you dun even remember abt what had happened to us... like the time we went pass this really pretty condo and you said that if i liked it you would buy the whole building down for me... i really hate myself for doing that and making you so upset... okay... im not sure if your upset anot... but i am... i've been so terribly upset for the past half a year... im too afriad to msg you... but sometimes i bring myself to do it and ur reply makes my day so much nicer... but it usually doesn't seem very friendly... it seems like cryin myself to sleep isn't goin to work much longer... you should go get some sleeping pills for me... gonna try msgin you now... luv ya always...

lalala~

2005-04-11T19:23:00.001+08:00

just finshed my OBS essay... *phew* so tired... i want to sleep... but i still got to learn my ting xie... haha... so guai rite? haha... i decided to start of anew and do a good deed to my ever lovely mum... i dun wan her to get high blood pressure and leave this world first... nonono... i dun wan that to happen... so i'll be a good girl... do my work... then she will be very happy... then i oso happy... then the whole world very happy... haha... almost the whole world la... i haven't been blogging for such a long time... i oso dunno what to blog... just that im damn bored now... and there are no nice programmes on tv so im blogging... haiz... im so sad... so sad... just quarreled with someone whom i could say is one of my best frens... but she backstabbed me...okay... not really backstab but would you hug and say i luv you to someone whom you tell other ppl that you hate her? abit contradicting rite? well... i decided not to fren her... haha... im so childish... but yea... i dun deserve someone like her... or she dun deserve to have me... i thought i could trust her... so i told her my secrets, let her know my frens, play pranks with her on my frens and pretending i dunno... we had so much fun together... but who could have thought that she actually hated me... another i can't stand is if you dun have any one who likes you... its is okay... no guys like me too... i dun have any guy frens to go out with too... but do you have to lie? abt all those guy frens that like you and give you stuff? plzzz... we have not even seen them... and your always in a rush to get us out of the way if your meeting "them"... okay... maybe ur afraid that we might steal him away or what... but dun you even trust us? ur frens? and since "he" is willing to break up with "his" gf to be with you... he wouldn't fall for another girl rite? so are you lying or do you not trust us? to think that i believed you... all those freaking lies that you said... if it wasn't for other ppl... i would know that you were lying all along... i wouldn't know that im treating someone who doesn't even like me as a fren... i dun think it is being fair to me... okay... you can blame me for being so niave as to believe you... but what do you think made me believe in you? cuz ur my fren... and you always treat me so "nice"... i really really thought maybe the other ppl were just lying to me abt you so i didn't really bother till now... i've finally seen through you... pull whoever you wan to ur side... i dun really bother... i can be the lonely freak if you wan me to... but i know that my true frens with stick with me through thick and thin... and they wun leave me and i wun leave them too... maybe you think that im being too impluse... but i dun think so... i've thought of it... and i really can't trust someone who may not even trust me... i'm still thinking if i should tell ivan peh abt all that has happened... you better hope i wun... or if you think that he would be on ur side no matter what then dun need to hope liao lor... haiz... i really miss the days we had together... but there is no turning back... like all my other frens that i have quarreled with... none of them bothers abt me... not even when i msg them... and i know you will become like them... oh yea... another think i can't stand nor seat abt you is the fact that you suck up to teachers, parents and whoever who maybe of good use to you... why can't you just do things on your own account... you dun need ppl to pull strings for you... ur not useless... ur doing so well in ur studies and stuff.... haiz... good luck to you... wish you all the best...

weird dream...

2005-03-26T13:32:00.000+08:00

i had a weird dream... damn weird... i dreamt that i was kinda like working for mr teh... my science teacher... i was helping him look after his kids and clean his house... yea... so i stayed there... and played with his kids... he had a elder daughter and a younger son...so i looked after them and helped clean the house and everything... then i happened to stumble on a picture... when did mr teh have another three sons? weird... i only looked after one... later on... i read a book... and it said if you look at the picture clearly... you will see that the other three boys faces are not clear... i looked... and yeah... it was not clear... i was scared... did it mean that there were ghost in that house... i read on... i seems like mr teh's son has this thingy that causes him to have another three ppl inside him... its like a split personality... but he is always still him... but he may also be any of the other boys at the same time... so how did their image get into the photo? at that time... mr teh returned and i begged him to let me go home immediately... but he said that it as late and he needed me to help him clean his equipment... etc etc etc... i couldn't remember... but i remember one part when his computer suddenly switched on and showed a scary thingy... which turned out to be funny... well... haha... weird dream eh?

cinderella story

2005-03-26T01:47:00.000+08:00

i just watched "a cinderelle story"... yeah... im kinda slow... so mel kindly lend me the VCD... thanxs mel... well... the show is soooo nice... so touching... i actually cried at the part where they told the story of her pretending to be princetongirl... like wth!!! who would do that to such a pretty little lass... omg... i feel like hitting that b****!!! i was so totally absorb in the show... i felt like i was really there... expirencing the whole magical prince and princess thingy going on... omg... it felt magical... but too bad the princess wasn't me... and i wun be able to find my prince charming... yea... maybe if i go on to the net and find some guy.. maybe he will be the one... and we will live happily ever after... but.. get real! there are really no such things... its just a dream... just a story... just a show... its never gonna happen... even if it does... it wun happen to me... anyway... i dun have a step mother and two ugly step sisters... what i do have is a nice whole family... and im so happy... i dun need no prince charming... maybe i do... but not at this time... i really wanna do well in my studies... get into the poly and do my subject of interest... who knows... maybe i'll find him there... or is he just right beside me.. but i just dunno??? but it can't be anyway... im from a girls' school... i dun mix around with lots of guys... those i used to mix around with think im some slut... but who cares... as long as i know that im not... i can't be a slut anyway... im still a virgin... blah!!! you really shouldn't let what others say affect you... its what you say and you want that is important... go girls!!! i learn from life that you should not be so dependent on ppl... cuz if they might leave you... you will just fall and hit the floor... ouch! i know that its nice to have someone to depend on when you are stressed up and sad... thats what i need now... but its becuz i was too dependent that i fell and im trying to get up now... im thinking... why isn't that person helping me up like he always did... whats wrong? and cuz i've been too dependent... i dunno how to get up... im in a loss... the world seems to be falling apart... the heavens are crying with me... but look at the bright side... once you learn how to get up... your so glad that you fell... so now you know how to prevent it... and how to get up easily... ren shen zhong nan mian you qi you luo... so dun take it to heart... learn from it... start anew... and everything will be alright... have faith in yourself... you can do it...

2005-03-25T23:57:00.000+08:00

"after school went for drama. char wanted to pon drama, but i din want to. cos i din go for quite a while already. like 1 month or smth. last last last week was because of detention. then they rest were just ponned. so char waited in school for me. i was like begging her to go. cos i dun wanna be the only sec 3 there. plus the teacher is so DIAO >:( so i went there took my attendance (just for a better record la) then half an hour later, when the excerises started to get all retarded i told her that i had to leave. haha. so i left ((:*
then char went home with me. we were like going crazy in the room. pretending to take photos and all. HAHAHA. changed then went town. went to cine. level 2 toilet. to meet up with val and pard. but they weren't there. so we went to the CD shop. i bought jay sean CD :D then went toilet again. saw val there. then went upstairs and found out that they were no tickets to eye 10. SINCE I HAD NOT HANDPHONE. NEITHER HAD THEY. we went to the phone booth. how nice. saw xiao xiang. then saw shu mei and her frens. said hi and all. then went to lido. met kelly and pard there. they bought their 7.30 tix without us. and it was full. i was so disspaointed. very very ):
so we left them and walked to taka. WE WERE STARVING. cahr and val went to buy lots and lots of food. i went to the lancome photo shoot. HAHHAHAH. i remember i went there before , mel lynn accompinied me, to do the photo shoot. i was the youngest i think. cos everyone were like adults or 16-18 years old. char actually told me to try the shoot again. but i din want to laa. so while they were shopping for food, i went to watch the models do the cat walk. it was so cool okay. omg!!! :D
i cldnt take it no more, so i went to find them. bought lots of food too. cheese sausage. mmm. yumm ((: then went out side taka to eat. saw zhen wen, russell and danton. after that went to try clothes and more clothes at MNG. we were creating an earthquake in the dressing room. once we got out of one cublicle. we wld start laughing at how we looked. cos all of them werent nice.
walked around taka. we were causing havoc at the sun glasses section. HAHA. it was super funny la. we were trying on HUGE sungalsses, with large coloured frame. mine was green :DD char was red. we were laughing so loud that the sales girl came and showed us that she was irritated. so we left (: yay. then walked walked. tried on makeup a. and went to the hello kitty store.we were getting all excited XD so cute worx. then walked to wisma to go home. then val and char told me that an old man tried to molest me. val was so angry with the guy. and i was like huh? huh? wheres the guy. im blur. char said that.
oh wells this entry sound like a compo. glad i din watch eye 10. i won't be able to sleep if i did. plus we would have missed out creating havoc in taka. acting all retarded when visiting a store. yayssssss. i love valpal and char. "

haha... was too lazy to write so i copied and paste from my sweetie pie's bloggy... sorrie... hope to go out and have fun with you all again!!! wheeee!!!

2005-03-19T13:41:00.000+08:00

okay... im forced to write this entry... cuz mel wants me to blog abt our tennis "game" on thurs... it wasn't really a game though... we couldn't play against each other so we played with the wall instead... haha... and i finally decided that i played better with the wall and that maybe i should play squash instead... not a "too bad" career choice rite? haha... well... so we just played and played... then we chatted abt some stuff in between... we had to keep picking up the balls from behide the wall cuz we kept hitting it over to the other side... haha... soon... it was time to go back home... so mel treated me to milo and fillet o fish... yum yum... then we went to try out clothes and stuff... haha... had lots of fun... and mel keep asking me to buy this and buy that... haiz...

the next day... i went to sentosa with my frens and their church frens... cheryl, yvette, pathom, dexter, yong zhi, filson, rouhei aka girl girl, shaun and some others whom i have forgotten their names... lai qiang aka kusu joined us later on... okay... it was weird to go to sentosa with soo many ppl that i dunno... so i kept to my social circle and didn't really tok to the others... but i had lots of fun... made frens with the girls from yvette's circle and we played "bomb" here "bomb" there... i was slow so i got "bombed" with water quite many a times... haha... well.. so we played until we had to go... then we had to bath in the temporary bath section cuz the permanent one was in renovation... blah!! then we went to eat steamboat... which we didn't had enough money to eat... so we went off to eat kfc... sorrie... can't really remember what happened.. so will just keep it short and say that it was really really fun... was so tired that i fell asleep in no time...

yesterday... we went to watch sbsp!!! spongebob squarepants... haha... it was damn lame... everyone in the cinema was laughing and laughing... except me... i think i am turning very weird nowadays due to some stuff... haha... im mad!!! but yea.. there was some funny parts that made me laugh... but i was expecting to laugh till i got a stomache... but no... i didn't... sad sad... i was sitting on a particular seat that someone sat with me the other time... it brought back soo many memories... sad sad... time can't go back to where we used to be... so why dun we all turn les?!? yeah!

lalala~

2005-03-13T16:24:00.000+08:00

its been quite a wonderful weekend... but i've gain lots of weight... sheesh... well.. first things first... the good news... i proposed to my sweetie jan jan at OG on saturday... and she agreed!!! but she is still upset abt the fake flowers and that i didn't give her a ring... oh my dear jan jan... i'll get you one asap!!! so dun be upset yea? okay!!! another good news is that we found another shopping heaven!!! yeah!!! we went there yesterday and it had so much in store for us that we were bankrupt in minutes!!! so we had to borrow money from cai... haha... shall not say where it is cuz we sure dun wan ppl to go there and buy clothes that are exactly the same as ours... yup yup... so i shall just keep it a secret till further notice... haha... the third good news is........ we all went to take neoprints!!! and it turned out pretty nicely... but one was pretty weird cuz mel stpped on cai and cai had a pretty weird reaction in the neo... haha... look into friendster for more details... haha... but there were bad news too.. one of course was cai... she sprained her ankle on our way out of the shopping heaven... poor her... she was in such terrible pain... so jan jan, my darling's mother send her home where she took a good rest... haha... now you really dun have to take pe anymore... another sad news was... our holey pockets... we are all sooo broke now... sad sad... but the shirt was really pretty... and i couldn't find a nice skirt... so i broke down to myslef and bought the shirt.. luckily it fitted nicely... or else i'll go bang my head on the wall... well.. jan jan bought many nice stuff... and i was so jealous... mel's von duct skirt was damn nice... maybe i should go get one too... haha... but ur bling bling channel necklace was really abit too big... but nice la... hopefully all four of us can go there again soon and with lots and lots of money and buy the whole place down... haha... and the last very very very sad thingy... is... me!!! i had to walk all the way home... cuz i took a cab over to ps cuz i was late... and that money was meant to top up my card... damn it.. so i walked and walked... but as ah zhui said... miracly... charlotte whom i have called to ask her to fetch me home, found me walking along the streets of chinatown and walked with me back home... haha... my legs hurt really badly... but i guess the calories and fats of the duck rice and salad with lots of thousand island dressing has been worked off... yeah!!! oh my... my little sis is eating ice cream!!! and its so tempting!!! but guess what? i am not going be tempted by that and ruin my diet... nononono!!! im hoping now that im gonna go out and take neos with my little sis later... plzzz plzzz plzzz!!!

back from obs

2005-03-05T15:21:00.000+08:00

yeah!!! im finally back from that nasty obs... it was soo damn tiring... but overall it was fun... didn't have enough sleep... even though a overslept on the last day... haha...everyone was looking for me la... haha... well... i was very slack on the last day and night la... just sat and toked to samme and gang... phew... im so glad to be back... but i was quite surprised that i didn't cry at night... i was just too exhausted... so i just put my bloop bloop on my head and zzzzzzzzzzz... i was fast alseep... haha... but i cried when sammie cried.... i oso cried when i toked abt my mum's sickness cuz sammie cried and made me cry too... i oso cried when i saw the way mel lee was changing into her mum... actually i guess i luv you mel... just that i maybe a little too harsh on my words... ya... well... my bed felt wonderful!!! I slept like a dead log... and after starving myself for the last 5 days... im now binging on my food... haha... i guess thats what you call it in chim words... i get hungry like every 15mins aft i eat... haha... i can hear my stomach growling now... can't wait to go to town, play pool or just some plain sightseeing... i just have to get into civilisation!!! at that pulau ubin... there was no music... no late nights... no shopping... nth at all!!! so sad... i guess thats why sammie just went mad and bought almost everything in the souvenior shop on the last day... haha... i only bought a aluminium bottle and a shirt... which i dunno how to spell... haha... now im just listening to jay chou's cd over and over again... i miss him so much.... i was screaming like shit last night while watching his mtv... he is soo cute... his speechless emotionless face makes me go crazy!!! and his smile!!!! omg!!! i could just kill myself just looking at that smile!!! now listening to his "ta de jie mao" omg!!! its so nice...

day1: went over to school then they fetched us over to punggol jetty where we took a "5star" sampan over to pulau ubin.. my watch/grp is called shackleton... which some ppl call it skeleton and i call it slackerton/slackertown. we gave over valuables to vanessa over instructor whom looked like miss belle tan my lasy year form teacher... so it is like a was with her for the last 5 days... haha... another teacher looked like ms leong...the girl instructors are mostly quite pretty and damn fit... dunno how the do it... haiz... the guy instructers are mostly good looking and fit except for that andy... haha... same name but so diff... haha... well... there was the instructor called kim chuan or you can call him kimmy... haha... and another one called yong kang which is a mix of yong qi and er kang from huan zhu gege... haha... we did all the admin work... then learned how to belay each other... and played many ice breaking games... we oso learned to pitch tents... and collected our very "nuitritious" 5 day rations... then went to pack our stuff... and bath then slept in the jungle... omg... i was so noisy... you could hear someone or maybe even something walking around our tents at night... i was sleeping next to the entrance of the tent... and i was soo freaked out.. so i tried not to face the entrance and forced myslef to sleep... you could hear lots of crickets and birds that made very lud and noisy sounds in the middle of the night...

day2: we woke up at abt 5 and all of us climb down the jungle in the dark... we thought we were the earliest to wake up since it was soo dark.... but when we arrived at our stalls which was wear we kept our stuff... we saw everyone awake and packing to go off already... we ate breakfast and went off for rockclimbing... it was the most challenging wall on obs... no wonder very little ppl could reach the top... aft that... we packed our bags into the huge obs bag that they provided for us so that we can prepare for our expedition 2mlw... then we changed into our wet clothes... and went kayaking... i partnered may ying... and we made a very good pair... we learned and practised to capsize and resue each other... it was damn fun and we were looking forward to the kayaking/sea expedition 2mlw... then we had to row all the way to a nearby place to pitch our tents and cook dinner as we are going to stay there for the night and set off from our kayaking/ sea expedition from there 2mlw... there were many sandflies and stuff... but we all slept quite well... our dinner was kinda like shit... cuz the rice was all hard but the can curry chicken made it much better...

day 3: we woke up @ 4:45 cuz it was drizzling but soon went back to sleep... suddenly it rained very heavily and the tent started flooding... sheesh... but soon it stopped... and we all went out of our tent... we each ate a piece of plain bread for breakfast and we started packing our tents and stuff... at around 9:45 we set over on our expedition... we had to kayak all the way to somewhere near camp 2 and then trek back to camp 2... it was so tiring... and fustrating... so may ying started shouting at me... but i just kept quiet... so she felt very guilty and kept saying sorry to me aft that... but i didn't blame her... i would have screamed and shouted like her if i was fustrated... but i was just too exhausted to say anything... 16 km to camp 2... and the current was so strong... it kept drifting us backwards... so we had to kept using our might to go front... omg... so tired... but we perservered on... yea! finally we reached... and there were tents over there already... i was so happy to see that we have reached and because i tot those tents were ours... but it was actually the other grp's tents... then met mel lynn, chantelly, and yen xi there... toked to them... so happy to see my friends again.. but i was missing my darling sweetie pie sammie... mel lynn said that maybe sammie went home already... so i was very worried... haiz... then we trekked back to camp 2 and stayed there for the night... the maggie noddles was nice.. wanted to have more... but was afraid there would not be enough for the rest... so i just quickly ate and went to wash up so as not to get anymore tempted... finally we got to bath... so happy!!! finally we all smelled so nice... haha... but got terribly sunburned... so it hurt as we walked around and when we bath... slept in a wet tent...

day4: we had to trek to camp 1 to use the height activities there... we used the indiana and we pleased to hear that we were one of the first we grps to use it since it was reconstrcted.. haha... this time we made sure we put lots of sunblock cuz we just got very sunburned and suntanned yesterday... i was the one of the last to do the activity... i wanted to do the easier one... but there was not enough time... so i did the more diff one... and i was stuck on the for almost 30 mins la... cuz i was so scared... but the encouragment from my grpmates made me go on... finally i was done with it and went down to belay for my other friend... thats when i knew that kai ting was a great fan of jay chou and sly too... so we toked and toked abt him for the rest of the trip... aft the activity... we quickly went into shelter as it was raining... and our instructor gave us some very good news... that is that we were going to have lunch at the cook house at camp one where they have good nuitritous and already cooked food for us!!! YEAH!!! and guess what!!! we had dinner there too!!! yummy!!! then we went for another height activity which is the ddd/double dangle duo/ nutcracker... its called the nutcracker cuz guys can't do it... haha... its hard to explain how though... haha... our aim was to get 100 points... but we got 125 instead... haha... well... i caused my partner, r/ariyati/i-want-tea to strain her leg cuz i wanted to get up to 15 pts... sorry... she said that ever since she strained her leg the other time... she decieded not to do anymore things that she could not do... but this time she did it cuz of the grp... i was so touched... well... then we went for dinner... and trekked back to camp 2 with the yong kang person... haha... we were supposed to clear up our stalls and stuff... but i met sammie... and she cried when she saw me so we all cried together and aft that slacked together... i guess the ppl in my grp were kinda pissed that i slacked while they did so much... but i was very tired and i really missed the biscuits... that night i slept in shan shan, ariyati and phuong's tent... it was wet... but sleep-able... haha...

day5: woke up later then the rest... guess the grp got angry with me again... then i slacked with sammie and gang but helped out once in awhile... then we got our bags ready to set off... went to buy souveniors... then got backed to our classes... hugged all the biscuits... and kept smelling the orange that xinya gave to me... haha... it was very sweet smelling... and soon my gang was all smelling oranges... haha... got up the boat... got down the boat... reached punggol jetty... the police checked out belongings for drugs and stuff... but i guess all the found was smelly wet clothes... haha... then got on the bus... went back to school... got orange juice all over my pe shirt... got back to school... very happy... then took a cab with sammie to newton to visit my mum... and lompang kim on the way... saw my mum... showed her my lips that were swollen from the sunburn... i guess she could just cry cuz she was so shocked and worried to see me soo dark and soo burnt... ate her chicken rice... it was delicious... even sammie said so... haha... then took a cab home...

HOME SWEET HOME!!!!!

can't wait to go out and party the night away... but we got two on-coming test... one is a math which i am soo gonna fail... and one is lit... which i dunno what the hell is going on... haha... wish me good luck... even if i decide to go out and not study... the tan lines and sunburn will cuz me to not be able to wear sleevesless and skirts for at least a month... sad sad... make god heal me soon... miss everyone soo much... but i guess it was peaceful without me around... sheesh... im getting hungry again and the jay chou's cd has stopped playing:( see ya matey!!!

late night out

2005-02-26T14:55:00.000+08:00

oh my... what a tired and fustrating friday... got scolded for not participating and being more initiative during pe... so the whole class declared recess and went straight for recess... cuz ms lee told the girls not taking pe to go for early recess... so we went too... how would we know that she wanted us to stay there and dunno do what... its not as if we are not participating... we are just kinda slow... and ms lee has a weird way of showing that she is pissed... she just smiled throughout the lesson... wth... smiling leh!!! then still can smile and walk away from our class... -_-''' then got scolded during maths too... cuz we always handed our work up late... and i failed again for my third a math quiz this year... haiz... then mrs lim was kinda pissed with our pw grp for being too far away from the project and kept talking but not giving her any actions... blah! then i aft sch... spent $6 on taking a cab to newton mrt so that my maid can pass me my tennis racket and then back to sch... sheesh... was late for my first tennis lesson of the year... got scolded by the tennis coach for not trying to learn... when i was trying my best to swing the racket the way he taught us too... maybe im just slow... then got scolded for my shoes... oso got scolded for hitting the tennis ball out of the court... it wasn't my fault that it oso went out for the school... i just have to say that "bless that car or person who gets hit by the tennis ball"... then got scolded for not throwing the tennis ball from behide my head so that it gets caught in the fence... damn him... i was throwing it from behide my head!!! and it got stuck in the fence... but that bloody freaking asshole said that i was not doing it the correct way and asked me to stand on the pavement and dun do anything liao... f***! i was going to scream at him liao... but melissa said that its better not to show him any attitude or else he will give me more trouble during the next tennis lesson... but i had fun throwing the balls at that bitch in sec 2... haha... she was behide the fence... so i kept throwing as hard as possible... trying to hit her... it felt like i did... and it sure felt good... haha... but thank god i dun have to go for tennis anymore... cuz i have not send in my application from tennis and the dunno what you call it has closed... so i can't join anymore... well... at least i got a free lesson and i dun have to face that %$*^&)*^^&#% again!!! after that... i was thirsty like hell... then went to drink 100 plus and cai ling taught me how to do that qns i didn't know how to for my third quiz... haha... she was goin to vomit blood liao... haha... then went over to sammie's house to bath and then go sight seeing... haha... but today was very "cloudy" so got nothing to see... haha... sammie lend me her nice black shirt and yellow skirt... and i my leg hurt from that super high heels... and i tried not to exert to much pressure on it in case i break it... haha... i looked like a tennis bumble bee nerd with my school bag and tennis racket... haha... then met up with darius and pathom... then sammie had to go home... send her to the escalator... then went to tcc to meet darius and pathom... then we went to tiong to watch a midnight movie... white noise!!! haha... waited soo long for 12am to come... then the guys just played arcade... while i sat at the toy rides outside resting my aching feet... lol... finally the time pass by... and we went in to watch the movie... darius was scared too... so he did not allow me to exchange places with him... cuz there was two empty seats next to me... lol... i didn't watch most of the parts cuz i was too afraid... darius tried to ask me to watch... but i refused too... the noise itself was scary enough... haha... then finally the movie ended... pathom and darius somehow quarreled to see who would send me home... cuz pathom promised my mum that they would send me home cuz they wanted me to watch the movie with them... but they both decided that both of them should go and we went home... lol... they kept scaring me when we were walking from the taxi stand to my house... i almost cried when pathom asked us to keep quiet and listen to some noise when darius suddenly screamed in my ear... blah! both of them was just as scared as i was... cuz they watch the whole movie... haha... funny people... i came home at 2am... everyone was sleeping... i couldn't get to sleep... but finally i closed my eyes... and fell asleep... woke up @ abt 1:45 today... was late to go out with my joseph... and when i called him he was like "hallo! auntie! do you know what time it is now?" i just laughed and apologized to him... haha... maybe me goin out with hansel later to go watch constantine since joseph can't or dun wan to go out anymore... but i dun think so... maybe should stay at home... rest more... so that i wun suffer from the insomia i will get at obs... blah!!!

song

2005-02-20T15:03:00.000+08:00

Title: Missing ya
By: Me
where are you????
im so sad...
where are you????
i miss ya so badly...
i keep thinking that im seeing you wherever i go...
did i really see you???
or was it just my eyes playing tricks on me???
is it true that the first cut is the deepest?
i guess it true...
cuz thats what i feel now...
the pain is hardly there...
but it will always remain as a scar on me...
i miss your jokes...
i miss your warmth...
i miss your smile...
i miss your coolness...
i miss the the warm body that held me so tightly when i was cold...
i miss the tender hand that i hardly held...
i miss the sweet lips that i never touched...
i miss you...
why do i miss you?
when i dun exist in your heart anymore...
why why why???
thats what fills up my mind whenever wherever...

2005-02-18T22:07:00.000+08:00

didn't go to school yesterday... had a "headache"... haha... so i slept all the way till 11 or 12... did my chinese homework... haha... first time sia... then slacked alot... went online... waited for the ppl to trickle in... boring!!! But it was nice to slack on a school day while everyone else is slogging themselves out in school... haha... went to school today... became super hyper cuz i miss all my friends sooo much... muah muah!!! then i was behaving so stupidly the whole day... hahaha... after school... chantel, cailing, valerie and me went to watch a movie... sammie joined us after her dental appointment... jan ooi couldn't make it... boohoo!!! Then we went to watch "hide and seek" it was so freaky... the twist was so unpredictable!!! cool!!! but i was using chantel's jacket to cover my face while i lean on sammie's shoulder so i didn't see much of the scary parts... but some parts were really just too unpredictable... it caught me off guard... so i saw it... and i screamed sooo loudly... haha... i luv to watch horror movies... it usually doesn't really freak me out until a few days later... but this movie totally freaked me like... just now!!! haha... then sammie and me went to take neoprints... haha... it was so totally lame... i look like a freaking ugly pig in it.. but sammie looked so sweet... haha... some guy's friend came up to sammie to ask her for her number for his friend... sammie kept quiet... i was like asking the guy "what?! what?!" cuz i didn't hear what he had asked sammie... but that freaking guy didn't even look at me... f*** him!!! okay... dun blame him... im just to acbc to look at... Anyway... the guy just thought that maybe it was too inconvinient for sammie to give her number... so he went off... i am ugly, sammie... stop saying that im not... i know myself better... or else those guys would want my number too rite? haha... and im tooo short for normal guys anyway... haha... im stupid... wanted to shop longer with my ex gf, sammie darling, but she had to go... so we couldn't take a second neoprint... sad sad :( haha... ya... i luv ur fire rescue shirt, little sea monster!!! haha~ next tuesday we are all going out again to buy stuff for the OBS... which is next next monday!!!! Shitz!!! i dun wan to become a chao ta short ass when i come back... but i think i'll be able to lose alot of weight... so yea!!! but they say that there are ghosts... and insects and lots of scary stuffy... im so scared!!! nvm... i'll bring bloop bloop ( the micro-beaded heart my ex-gf jan ooi gave to me for valentines)... so sweet... it will protect me... hope i'll be with all my friends... or the best is sammie... then we will be scaring each other... and screaming our heads out in the middle of the night... muhahaha!!! I'll miss my mummy so much... boohooo!!! 5 days leh... do you know how long that is? Apart from civilisation!!! haha... crap... actually i can't wait to go and have fun and lose some weight of at the same time... but its what that lurks in the dark that im afraid of... haha... cuz im afraid of the dark... it makes me helpless as i can't see... okay... im freaking myself out now... cuz the little girl, emily, was afraid of the dark too... if you didn't know... emily is this pretty (dun really think she is pretty but ppl in the movie keep saying that she is very pretty) little girl with pretty ( okay... this is really gorgeous...) blue eyes in "hide and seek"... i luv her eyes!!! and she is such a good actress for a little girl of her age... she should get an award for it... hahaha!!! i thought i have been seeing someone the whole week... and every word that starts with the first three or two letters of his name makes me think of him... so shit-to-fied!!! why do i keep thinking of him... get him out charlene!!! OUT OUT OUT!!!! haiz... my legs are freaking sore from all those walking in high heels... gonna take a nice bath and go to my lala land and dream of my darlings... haha... luv ya all!!!

sad sad day :(

2005-02-13T16:57:00.000+08:00

haiz... just came back from sending my maid of 4 yrs off to the airport... i was so sad... i kept crying like hell... but tried to calm myself down... so as not to make her cry too... haiz... to think that i didn't like her when she first came... miss her so much... i think im gonna cry again... anyway... i met my Lp jie at the airport... she was sending her mum off... haha... had fun toking to her... luang zhen is taller than me liao la... :( then we went to my new maid's cuzin's house... at lunch over there... her kids are so cute!!! her cuzin's younger sis is a les... luckily i called her auntie... lolx... then i walked and walked... all the way to tampines mall to shop for my valentines' day pressies for my beloved biscuits... i hope all of you will like the pressies... :) haiz... i haven't study for my chinese and bio test 2mlw... im soo dead... better go study now...

without me

2005-02-10T22:44:00.000+08:00

Title: Me
the wind is blowing my hair across my face
the radio plays a sad slow love song
my mind is filled with you
and only you
i feel so cold without you by my side
so helpless
so unworthy of your love
yet im yearning for more of it as each day passes
where are you?
who is that girl beside you?
is she the one for you?
where has "us" gone to?
why are you so heartless to leave me like that?
did it not hurt you at all?
was it just a fling?
or was it what i did wrong?
can you tell me please?
dun leave me confused this way
leave me with happiness, memories and a place as a friend in ur heart
send me a msg once in awhile
let me hear ur voice once in awhile
that is enough for me
enough for me to leave you
to your wonderful life ahead
without me...
Done by:Charlene Marn
For: Ppl who feel the same way as me

CNY Celebrations

2005-02-08T19:24:00.000+08:00

hohoho... today is the eve of chinese new year... yeah!!! one month and six days of sch... plus sat and suns and holidays... doesn't time pass so fast? hohoho... today my mum and maids were doing the last touches to the spring cleaning... i found so many of my old journals from primary sch... haha... i used to be so dumb... i couldn't even spell racket... lolx... guess what i found out.. joan chang used to be my best friend... omg... i dun even remember toking to her... lolx... sorrie joan... i've got sml... but its was so surprising!!! lolx... me and sammie used to have some diary thingy that we shared together... with all the stupid little stuffy inside... lolx... we had lots of laughs reading it the other time... when can we read it again? lolx... we used to be so small and innocent... even though we did alot of bitching around... lolx... time passes so so so so so so so fast... i seems like yesterday that we all were in primary one... lolx...wish we can go back to the fun times we had... we had lots of fun today too... and we wanted to go out around this time to watch constantine or something like tt... boohoo... i wun be able to go... neither can the others go... sammie is goin to malaysia to visit her relatives.. she wun be here to laugh and play with us... *sob sob* she wun be here to wear her new year clothes to sch on friday too... ohhhh... im so gonna miss her... im already missing her... today went out with her and jason... was trying to smile and not be dao... but i still couldn't... haha... then we saw errol... this guy from a prime tuition centre... sammie says that he is cute... but i dun really think so... haha... then we saw nick chia... standing in front of the 700 bus... trying to stop the bus i guess... but think he got scared and went back to the bus stop... haha... saw bryan tan the fucker... he is still as ugly... as desperate... as stupid as ever... hate him... he hates me too... so who cares!!! the whole 700 bus was so crowded... so he couldn't get in... thank god... or i'll start staring at him... and he will pee on his pants!!! muhahaha!! he is such a coward... blah!!! then met the next guy on chantel's list... whats his name? haha... shall not tell all of you... or else chantel will come and strangle me... haha... then saw many sc girls... chij girls... acs guys... all whom i dunno but sammie knows... lolx... saw a bunch of oss ppl too... with this kinda cute eurasian guy... i kinda know him... as in my friends once told me abt him and his twin bro... lolx... i look like a twit today... so dao... so poser with my freaking starry bag... lolx... which you can see in my friendster pic... omg... im so into taking pics now... i wanna take down as many pics as possible... cuz i know later on in life... i will get forgetful and maybe when we get together... we can take out the pics and laugh at our stupidity... lolx... i luv all you biscuits... we are gonna have a great year ahead!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!!

had a dream...

2005-01-30T13:47:00.000+08:00

just had a dream... andy was inside... wearing a blue shirt with white stripes... still as cute as ever... pretended not to see him... and toked to my collegue... haiz... i miss him... but he doesn't miss me... he likes this girl in his class... but im happy for him to be able to find his happiness... wish him all the best... i was so surprised that he replied my msg the other day... i tot he wouldn't... i was so elated... lol... i learned a new word... i couldn't really blame him for our break up and everything... i could only blame myself... stupid me... i didn't treasure him when he was around... i tot it would last long... but... haiz... its all my fault... now its too late... it was too late long long ago... i really hope that we can actually become friends again... being able to see and tok to him is good enough for me... i dun need him to be by my side all the time... just being able to know that he is happy is the best thing that could have happened to me... i thought i have fallen in love with someone else... but... andy... haiz... you changed my life... i've learnt to respect myself... i did slip off that for awhile... but its always you that kept me up... oh... why am i toking abt this... lol... we have zi du 2mlw... and a maths test on tues... and e maths test on wens... so stressed... lol... but i'll jia you cuz you asked me to... and of cuz not to disappoint my parents who have such high hopes for me... im more matured now thanxs to everyone... i dun wan to be the stupid small little girl i used to be... i wanna grow up... and do good to the society... lol... im looking abit too far...

finally blogging again...

2005-01-26T18:05:00.000+08:00

hehehe... here i am... back here blogging cuz too too many ppl are complaining abt me not updating and stuff... im not so free okay? lol... why is everyone so free to blog? cuz they never do homework one... lol... actually most of them do do their homework... and even get good grades... sad case... lol... school has been alot of fun... even though im still trying my best to cope up with my e math and a math... but there are alot of math geniuses in my class... so smart rite? dunno why are they in the last class... tsk tsk... sadly... there is no more art and music to play a fool with... this year is a year to get serious... while next year... you have to be even more serious cuz its o lvl liao... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... times passes so fast... im already in sec 3... 15 yrs old... haiz... soon i'll be 80+++ and i'll just die... lol... no... i dun wan to die old... i dun wan ppl to remember me as an old naggy hag with lots of wrinkles... even though im already a naggy hag... lol... got to see chantel's black thingy again.. i just luv it... where can i get it... it looks great if you wear white... lol... okok... i sound like a lesbian... but hey... i really am... im proud to present samantha and jan ooi as my lesbian couple... lol... i luv them so much... chantel wants to be my les partner too... but she wanted to french... so i rejected her... lol... i rather french with ******... lol... shall censored his name so that my les partners wun know that im three timing them... lol... im a bi sexual... lol... im down with a flu and cough... lol... its all ******'s fault... he kept sneezing and coughing at me... shit... now im feeling so terrible and he doesn't want to bring me out... sheesh! i luv him to bits... but he belongs to some other person... but i luv him still... and i think he luvs me too... yaya... i think only... he is so sweet and caring... but...haiz... shall not go into details... many ppl read my blog hor! my teacher's are really good too.. except for a few of them... ms beh is a really good a math teacher... she is so nice and she teaches really clearly... mr teh... omg... mr teh is so cute... he reminds me of humpty dumpty... he is blad... old... fat... but so extremely cute... and he teaches really clearly with illustrations and stuff... ms audrey tan... alamak... my mum's friend in her time in sc... chum arh... im so scared of her... and we just had a history test... im so gonna fail... and she is soo gonna kill me... but overall she is a really good teacher... she tells us more than we should know... which are the interesting bits... and which also are very easy to absorb... lol... my chinese teacher... who is also my tennis teacher-in-charge... really lame teacher... not say very good at teaching... but hey... chinese is my mother tongue... how can i not know.. lol... i act smart nia la... she calls me "wen tong xue"... but she finally remembered my full chinese name today... lol... my e math teacher which is my form teacher too.. sucks... she mumbles and teaches herself the maths... while the rest of us do our own things... lol... our class has no prefect this year... yeah!!! thats why we all eat and sms in class... so far only one person got caught for using handphone... nobody got caught for eating... jan ooi almost got caught... lol... shit... i forgot what i was goin to type again... gtg catch a nap... its running away... lol... buai...

lalala~

2004-12-17T21:41:00.000+08:00

miss blogger is back!!!! yeah!!! LP jie see!!!! i'm updating... haiz... nothing much to update abt... only abt my horrible haircut... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... i look like a freaking ugly china doll... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! its damn ugly... no more pretty me... ok... i wasn't very pretty... but i was prettier before i cut my fringe... now i've got short fringe... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! like those ah lians on the street... and nono sammie... i'm not goin to start putting "x" on the end of ever single word... lolx... oops... ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!! i can't wait for my fringe to grow longer... its going to take pretty long... but it will be just nice when school re-opens... ermm... hope so... *fingers crossed* what else shall i update abt? erm... abt my trip to the mandai zoo? erm... i haven't gone yet... maybe monday or when... haha... any kaypohs wanna go along? haha... mandai zoo got ben and jerry ice-cream... yeah!!! haven't tried it so i dunno if it is nice... but heard that part of the money with go to the animal charity... so thats good... save the animals and grow fat at the same time... yeah!!! haiz... school is reopening soon... i haven't done my holiday assignments... neither have i packed my stuff... nor studied... i'm so dead... i'm so not goin to pass sec three... sooo gonna retain... but its damn embarrassing to retain whe ur already taking single science... haiz... im hoping to see many of my frens again... and have fun learning and playing together... haiz... how i miss school... but how i'll miss holidays when school reopens... yawn... i'll be too lazy to get up for sch and do my homework... and teacher will call and complain to my parents... as usual... that has been a practice ever since i was in primary three... yaya... i haven't change abit... *chokechoke* my mum is doing early spring cleaning... and the whole place is so dusty... haha... but quite good la... she helped me find some of the stuff that i have been looking for a few years already... haiz... there is nothing left to update... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... never mind... when sch reopens... i will have soo many things to say that i can't stop updating... muhahahaha!!!

k box...

2004-12-06T02:11:00.000+08:00

didn't feel like blogging today... but i just had to tell all of you that k box is soo damn fun... lalalala... me and wendy just sat there and sing and sing and sing... wheeeee!!! sang english songs... chinese songs... new songs... old songs... fast songs... slowwee songs... so many songs!!! so fun!!! haha... the three guys next door to us sang so horribly... hahaha... so me and wendy... who happened to be singing the exact same song as them... just had to sing louder and better than them... and of course... we did... what song was it? hmmm... i think it was jiang nan by can't remember who... its the song that goes... yuan yuan juan juan... tian tian nian nian.... erm... something like that la... so fun... at first i was damn shy to sing... but later i just got louder and louder... hehe... only when i know the lyrics to the song la... or else i'll just let wendy sing it... haha... but the service is damn bad... we wanted a refill of titbits but we waited for half an hour and no titbits arrived... so i called them again.. then we waited for another half an hour... got fed up... so wendy went personally to one of the ppl working there to ask for the titbits... so we got our titbits... and our refill of drink... then we just went on singing and singing... had to go off by 7... then went to take pics of the christmas decorations... then to the funfair... where leon saw me... but he didn't call out to me... sheesh! haha... then we walked to ps... bought a op shirt... then we went homey... yeah! i wanna go to k box again!!! and sing my lungs out... please register at my doodle board... thank you... haha... oh ya... can i ask for a favor? can you all tag my doodle board if you ever visit? i wanna know who are the ppl who read my blog... so as to minimise me toking bad abt some ppl... haha... no la... just wanna know... thanxs for ur co-operation... its 2am in the morning... and im here blogging... i'm damn tired but i can't get to sleep... miss my darling... haha... started calling him that since we got together... haha... tupid name la.. but... i like it... darling darling... where are you? miss ya lots... tag my doodle board k? its stagnant... erm... you dunno who my darling is?!? how can you not know?? its my one and only darling ____... haha... guessing game again... just to make this blog abit more fun and interactive... haha... lame... but darling... wanna go esplanade with you again... can we? can we? can we?

*~[ I may have cried a million times since we haven't been together]~*
*~[but all the times u made me smile is what will remain in my heart]~*

boredom

2004-12-05T10:45:00.000+08:00

hohohoho... i'm back to blog aft such a long break... sheesh!!! almost broke my nails while playing and poking my little sis just now... now there is a blue-black under the nail... so sad... my elder sis smsed us this morning... saying that she is in india now... and that she is fine... but her stomach isn't very used to the food over there... haha... poor girl... i can never go overseas alone... as in without my mummy... will miss her lots... then can't get to sleep cuz i think the place is haunted... but plzzz... why do i have to scare myself? dunno... my imagination damn wild... a single sound or moving thingy can send it way over the ends of the earth... haha... i hate to go on sch overseas trip... its enriching... but im scared... aren't i a silly little tweet.... haha... the sch holidays are so boring... nothing to do... just stay at home... sleep.. eat... play the com... sleep eat... play the com... nowadays dun really go out... cuz no one wants to go out with me... therefore no one askes me out... sad... nvm... wendy asked me out today... and im goin to buy that pretty op shirt and von dutch skirt... damn pretty... shall wear it for our christmas party... if it even ever gets planned and processed... haha... christmas is gonna be soo great!!! snowy!!! haha... still can't find my little snowflakes... so sad... anyone know where do they sell snowflakes??? not the real ones... but maybe something in the shape or snowflakes... like a bracelet or something... sheesh... this is goin no where... dun think i will be able to find it... oh ya... i took over my sister's phone... until she gets back from india... but nobody msgs me... sad... no calls... nothing... ahhhh... i really feel so damn left out this season... must have made too many enemies last season... tupid girl... my maid made kaya toast for me... yippee... yummy... didn't know why i woke up so early... maybe to ask my mum for money... yup... she gave me an advance in my pay... 40 bucks... then when i get my pay from jaslyn from the promoter's job that nearly kill my feet... i will return it to her... now... i can go get my shirt and skirt... yeah! sorry ppl... to blog such an uninteresting entry... really too bored to have anything to write abt...

*~[Can't Be Contented]~*

upset... upset... upset...

2004-12-02T15:34:00.000+08:00

i'm damn upset this days... upset... upset... upset... ya... upset over something that i have been upset for the past month... can just read my blog entries to find out... i dun wanna say... it just makes me more upset to say it... well... yesterday... i went to work.... haha... for one day only... as a sales promoter cum errand runner cum cleaner... haha... luckily i'm just taking over jaslyn for one day... i'll die if i have to do that forever... haha... my feet hurts... stupid shoes la... so high.... wanna kill my feet arh? haha... then i have to entertain customers... haha... i made alot of mistakes... alot alot alot... like ppl ask me if this is the smallest size... i'll just say yes or no... then i always get it wrong... haha... i get everything wrong... thats why alot of customer... thinking that dun have their size or colour... just walk out... hahahaha... i'm damn dumb... then had to do errands that involved me walking very very far to get or pass some stuff... but good la... then i dun have to entertain customers and make more mistakes... haha... but my feet really hurts... sometimes no customer... i got no chair to sit somemore.. then i just stand leaning against the counter and rest my feet... haha... and listen to the two seniors of the shop... one indian/malay and one chinese... very funny to hear them tok... tok in both chinese and eng.. so confusing... haha... then the indian one... asked me what is vinegar in chinese... haha... then i told her it is "chu"... haha... cuz she was trying to explain to her that she needs vinegar for her bbq... then she keep saying "the white water you put in ur beehoon"... hahaha... i wanted to laugh so badly... but i control la... haha... both of them very funny... the only fun thing abt the job is that you get to wear anything you want from the shop... i took a purple shoulder revealing top... nice... haha... omg!!! taufik's won!!! and his songs are being boardcasted on radio now... omg!!!! he is such a good singer... good vocals and his looks pretty good too... haha... he deserves to win... but i am a sly fan!!! he is so cute when he smiles... and i like his rocking attitude... omg... i dunno la... but i'm kinda happy with the results... haha... ya... must buy his album hor!!! support s'pore's first idol!!!! yeah!!! aiya... wait till his album come out liao then say la... haha...

nobody cares abt me...

studies vs working

2004-11-29T03:11:00.000+08:00

For us kids... studying is a hard hard chore... exams are so stressful that some of us wanna just end our lifes... and wish that we were never born on this earth to suffer so much... but have we ever thought that what are we goin to do when we grow up? what is our life goin to be like? will our life be better? maybe... if we get a good job and have very high salary... but what if we dun... even many university graduates can't get a job... what is goin to happen to the rest of us when we graduate... whats worst is that we stop schooling cuz its too "tough"... do we even know the true meaning of tough? what we are goin through now is just a teensy weeny bit of tough... compared to what we will get in the future... now... all you have to do is to study hard... be responsible for urself... and maybe some quarrels and stuff in ur social life... but what is goin to happen when you grow up? of cuz you dun have to study anymore... but you have to be active... you have to be responsible not only for urself.. but maybe for the whole company... this time.. ur parents can't be feeding you anymore... they should be quite old... you have to let them retire... and you not only have to support urself... but them too... then you have to learn lots and lots of stuff... like managing... accountants... stuff like that... many many things to do... you have hardly time for urself... unless you married a terribly rich husband... but how many rich eligible guys are there? are there enough for every girl? for guys? erm... i dun think you want to chi ruan fan... haha... ya... so what am i writing this for? erm... just asking everyone out there... study hard... this is not a bit hard compared to what you have to do in the future.. just take it an exprience... its just a stage of life... if you can't even handle this kind of stress... how are you gonna cope in the future? and if you study hard... you can be whatever you want to be... as long as you are willing to learn... nth is impossible... good luck everyone... lets go through this together... ^^

inspired by taufik's interview [i oso dunno why]

almost got a job

2004-11-28T19:51:00.000+08:00

haiz... almost got a job today... as a sales promoter as heartland mall... jaslyn intro me one... isn't she nice? but i didn't go... ahhhhhhhhhh... cuz i was waiting for cheryl... she wants to get a job too... so i asked her along... but she didn't turn up... why? i dunno... still cannot contact her... waited for an hour and a half... before i left and went over to my papa ivan's house... we just sat at the bus stop and talked... until there was this man that kept staring at us... so we walked away... into the coffee shop.. then we tok tok and tok some more... so long never tok to him liao... as in face to face la... haha... then aft that we went back to the bus stop and toked... cuz the man came and started staring again.. i think... haha... then i sent him off to church... he wouldn't let me send him all the way to church... cuz he was afraid that the ppl might mistaken... but i was just sheltering him with the umbrella... i couldn't just let him walk all the way to church in the rain rite? ya... so i walked him to the road near the church and i went off... took bus 123... all the way to clarke quay... then walk walk walk all the way to bugis... jiao suan liao... on my way to bugis... i met this ah ma... haha... she look quite old so i call her ah ma la... sorrie hor... haha... she asked me to shelter her across the road as she wanted to go to the bus stop over there... i so agreed and we crossed the road... on the way... she thanked me and may god bless me... let me find a good boyfriend... then she went on abt that there are many bad ppl around nowadays... when we have crossed the road... she asked me if i wanted to go to church... but i said i didn't want to... she looked disappointed... sorrie again... but i felt very touched that she asked god to bless me just because i sheltered her across the road... its like such a small thing... and she blessed me... omg... isn't she great... and her english is damn good... haha... then i reached bugis mrt station and i waited for my sis for abt 20mins... cuz she was at church... then we went shopping for her prom shoe... cuz her prom is 2mlw.. isn't it cool.. hope i will be able to get to sec four and go for prom too... yeah! so i was helping her choose shoes... help her put back the shoes... help her see if it matched her prom dress... i sooo wanted to get a pair of good and nice shoes for myself... cuz as you can see... all my shoes are like... rotting? haha... the shoes are all so nice... got many pink ones too... but some of the ones i tried were too small... haiz... i got big fat feet.... so hard to find shoes... only can wear sports shoes... or those covered type... or else very ugly... so sad rite? yaya... then there was this new brand... called "kawaii japan" in seiyu.... omg... all the acessories are soo nice... so pretty and kawaii!!! haha... i saw soo many pretty butterfly acessories today... omg... i'm gonna have a butterfly craze too... but its really hard to find snowflakes... so sad... i wanna have a pretty snowflake necklace... but cannot find... sheesh... then we went for dinner... or more like lunch and breakfast for me... haha.... i'm eating my dinner now... then we went to look at clothes... trying to find a nice skirt.. saw one very nice blue one... but didn't seem very "Pinkalily" at all... haha... then walked around... look at more clothes... i like the sweater in that shop.. what is that shop name arh? moo moo cow one arh? or is it milk? haiz... dunno la... but the pink sweater and white jacket very nice and fluffly... wheee!!! haha... around this time... my sis was getting tried and her feet was starting to ache... so we had to go home... and here i am blogging... haha... dunno what is life gonna take me again 2mlw... hope it will be full of adventure, excitement and romance... haha... what am i saying??

tried sia

2004-11-27T02:20:00.000+08:00

*YaWn* Tired... my feet hurts... awww... just came home and bath.. yaya.. at 1am... my mum was damn worried... she called everyone... haha... not really la... just called darius and my papa ivan... hey... i'm home already... dun worry k? haha... well... had a whole lot of fun today... met up with kusu at 5:30+... supposed to meet at 5:20 but both of us came late... hahaha... then we went to kallang's mac and eat and buy the incredibles toy for cheryl... so cute... haha... then met up with darius... walked all the way to the s'pore indoor stadium... met cheryl... waited for kai xiang... then aft that... cheryl and kai xiang went for the jay chou concert... then the rest of us went to marina south for steamboat... but i didn't want to eat... didn't want to meet some ppl... so kusu and me went to the arcade next to the stemaboat place... we played time crisis 2.... so fun... but i died before even finish playing area one... haha... then got cheated of one dollar at the dunno what kind of shit game that is... then we played photo hunt.... so lame... just lose one time then die liao... eeeee... then got out of the place... i went to the toilet... so spooky... so i faster wash hand then run out liao... hahaha... then we waited for the bus 400 to marina bay... but then my hand was itching for more time crisis 2... so we went back to play again... haha... then finally went to take the bus... we took all the way to the end... which was like only 4 stops? and we stopped at shenton way... very near my house... then walked to my house... hoping to eat nice yummy dinner... lalalala... then... OH NO!!! no one was at home... i was locked out!!! ya.. AGAIN!!! sheesh... so we walked all the way to marina bay mrt... only stopping by 7-11 to get kusu his burger and drink... the new flavour of root beer float tasted just like root beer... and it was so filling... haha... welll... we walked pass the mediacorps-suria and central studio... then up the express way... and into a dead end... ohoh... haha... but we walked on the grass la... then tupid kusu keep scary me... keep asking me what was that at my side... and that someone is walking behide me... so i told him:''if someone is walking behide me... it will be walking behide you too... =P" haha... i was so freaked out la... even though it was just some trees... haha... then we took the train over to lavender and bus 16 to the s'pore indoor stadium... wheeee!!! could hear jay chou singing... can you believe it? i was just 10 metres away from him... just seperated by the audience... a curtain that blocked my whole view...the counter... and the main door... so near la... could hear him... awwww... i almost wanted to charge in liao... haha... then i was just outside... listening and jumping around... hahaha...i soo wanted to go in... nvm.. me and kusu are sooo gonna go for his next concert in s'pore... then cheryl and kai xiang came out... then we waited for cheryl's mum to come... then i was walking and following the line on the floor... kai xiang asked me if i did watch wishing stairs anot? and that i looked like the girl in the movie... walking around like tt... haha... so "funny" rite? well.. he treated me to this nice chocolate muffin... thanxs!!! then it suddenly rain... and me and kusu had to run to the shelter...then cheryl's mum came... she looked angry... so scary... well... then we walked to kallang mrt station... but cuz the gate to the shortcut was closed... so we had to walk one big big round... it was still drizzling la... wah lao... leg really very pain... then cuz no train and no mrt... so kusu hired a cab and send me back home.. isn't he sweet... thanxs... so now... i'm back home blogging in case i forget what i did today... hehehe... got to go eat my medicine and go sleep liao... buai buai... is the font big enough?

on conference

2004-11-26T15:51:00.000+08:00

hey ppl!!! haha... i'm on conference...both on msn and on the phone... with cheryl and kusu!!! haha... can hear my blog music on kusu's com... tsktsk... read my blog... haha... kusu is cheryl's ah ma!!! haha... funny ppl!!! nvm... too lazy to explain... welll.. didn't go to my papa house today... so sad... he had bible study... but good for him la... study study bible bible... good for him and his health and.... stuff... haha... well... cheryl is goin for jay chou concert!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! bloody hell... i soo sad... haha... then kusu keep tempting me by playing jay chou songs and say that he would be singing those songs later... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!! i want to go too!!! sheesh... nvm... i goin with kusu and.. ahem... darius to go look aft leon... cheryl's bro... while she watch the concert... nvm.. ask kusu to lend me his mp3 then we listen to jay chou songs... hehehehe... well... so bored... have to go now... go and bath then go out liao.. buai...

i trust you.. and i know why you dun luv me anymore... i wun bother you no more... *Smiles*

maple story

2004-11-26T02:54:00.000+08:00

*YaWn* just finish playing maple story... already in level 8... but i dunno what do i wan to become... warrior? archer? magician? and got one more... but i can't remember... haha... 2:56am... and my poor maid is still washing the clothes... poor her... i hear the washing machine's alarm... wash finish liao... but she still got to go hang the clothes... poor thing rite? okok la... next time dun wear so many clothes la... dun change so often... ok? haha...actually... usually around 12... she would be asleep already... but cuz she went to watch movie with my youngest sis and cousin... so she has more work to do... guess what movie they watched... the polar express... haha... i wanna wait till christmas comes then go and watch... then got more of the snowy and christmas kind of feel... haha... i luv christmas... its all about snow... romance... warmth against the fireplace... haha.. no bad it doesn't snow in s'pore... i luv snow... especially snowflakes... they are sooo pretty... so... complicated... just like a spider web... i wonder how they made it... why did god made it this way? cuz its prettier this way? maybe? i dunno... my latest craze would be snowflakes... so i can go on a snowflake expedition soon... any snowflake luvers wanna come along too? haha... but i got locked out of the house cuz of them... omg... i'm so angry... my mum told my eldest sis to bring keys... ask my maid to bring keys... but she said that she forgot to tell me to bring the keys.. sheesh... what a great mum i have... haha... so i got locked out of the house for abt 1 hour... so i went downstairs to call and tok to ivan on the public phone... haha... so long never tok to him... feel so weird... think i wanna go look for him 2mlw... go pei yang gan qing... haha... lame... well... this morning... my mum woke me up early in the morning to go to see the doctor.. i'm not going to say why... cuz its embarrassing... well... so i went into the room.. then my mum was supposed to come too... but she went out to buy some stuff first... so she kinda force me to say what happened... at first.. i was like... "erm..." and i didn't wan to say... then she asked me is it that i have a bf? then i was like... what the hell... i bet she tot i came for some pregnancy test or something... haha... lame... then i was like... "No!!!" then i finally gave in and told her... haha... so lame... then aft that... supposed to go interview for some job... but cheryl couldn't make it... so i didn't go too... cheryl was asked by two guys to go watch jay chou concert 2mlw.. thats why she can't go out today... like... ahhhhhhhhhhhh.... two guys leh... wow... she damn you mei li la... every guy that knows her... falls for her... isn't she the best... i soo jealous... hahahaha... ppl chio mah... haha... personality good mah... not like you... tupid charlene... haha... sorrie... scolding myself again... its very usual one la.. dun worry... haha... well.. so 2mlw cheryl will be having a great time at my idol's concert... ahhhhhhhh... well... i may just be at home playing maple story... sickening... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh... so in the end... i went out with aaron... haha.. met him for the first time... wanted to laugh... he looked so funny... i tot he was really skinny and cute... but really.. if he was to slim down... he would look damn cute... haha... he was damn shy la... me too... so we didn't really tok much... then i bought a really pretty necklace and bracelet... so pretty!!! haha... its damn sweet... and i luv the necklace!!!! haha... met his ex gf... kellie... really pretty girl... like her hair... and her sense of style... tom-boy+girl... nice! she also very friendly to me... haha... aaron said that she has turned real hot now... haha... then we went to play pool... and i finally got two balls in... then i failed everything aft that... haha... but the place sucked la... no good one... the cue was going to break any minute... haha... and no techno!!! haha... dun go there and play liao... aft playing for abt 2hrs... we went to pick up aaron's fren... then off to dinner at burger king... as i was out of cash aft buying the necklace and stuff and oso aft playing pool... so i settled for a fish buger at 3.20... damn ex sia... should have gone to macs... haha.. my fav place... then me and kellie went over to pennisula plaza... i think... to o help her get a job in a guitar shop... tried three or four... but they didn't have any job vacancies... so sad... so we had to go home liao... bye bye... it was only about 9 when i was waiting for the train home... so early sia... first time... and i get locked out of the house... very funny... well.. then aaron goes on and on on msn abt how nice my nails are... and ask me how do i do it... like what do you mean by how i do it? its like that... haha... at first he just grabbed my hand and said... "are these real?" then i was like... "yes!!!" why does everyone say my nails look fake... they are real ok? and aaron likes them alot... haha... well.. its 3:22am already... need to go and sleep and boost up my energy to go tok and accompany my papa 2mlw... see ya ppl!!!

sorry for being so naive...

2004-11-24T13:12:00.000+08:00

sorry for being so naive...
sorry for believing everything you said...
sorry for luving you so much...
sorry for not being able to let you go...
sorry for letting you take over my mind...
sorry for everything that happened between us...
everything was just a mistake...

haiz... this song still goes to you... i finally knew the truth... finally... why did it take me so long... why? i'm so naive for thinking that you liked me... and you really want to be together with me... i'm so naive for believing all the sweet sms on how you couldn't bare to leave me and you hope that we would last long... i'm so damn naive... but finally i know... that you dun luv me... you never ever did... and you luv another girl... woah... i really took a really long time rite? more than a month aft we broke up... aren't i silly... and to think that i would do things that i were so dumb... i would always message you... and wait for ur reply like an idiot... and if you do reply... i'm so damn happy... i would go online and check if ur online... and i try not to go offline until you go offline first... haiz... ya... i bet that that girl that you like is really pretty and smart and understanding... and probably not a flirt too... i should have known that you wouldn't like a girl like me... i'm not ur type... at all... haiz... ya... at least now that i know the truth... i can go on with my life... ya... maybe we are still frens... i'll still wish you all the best on wooing that girl... i know there are still many things that i got to go find out myself... haiz... why can't you just tell me everything and stop keeping me in the dark... i still haven't found out why you had to play with me in the first place... can you tell me? please... i really want to know what made you do such a thing to hurt someone... you should have told me before we got started... so that the impact wouldn't be that great... oh... if you wanted to play with me... you can't say rite? ya... i get it... but... woah... your acting skills are great... to think that i couldn't see through it... yesterday night... i felt something that i haven't felt in a long time... heart ache... i hurt so badly... i could not sleep... but i finally got myself to close my eyes... wipe of the tears... and go to sleep... i was thinking... abt you... and me... the times we had to together... it seem so great... the only time that we toked to each other so much... but thanxs... thanxs for making my memories with my first boyfriend so sweet and nice... i'll never forget abt it... give me some time... i'll give up on you... i will... like how i did with the other two guys i luved so much... i did take me a few years... but at least i did give up... i dun think you will ever know how much you mean to me... how many friendships i have given up for you... how much tears have flown for you... maybe we will become like how me and jonathan have become now... i used to like him so much... and cried alot when he used to scold and call me rude names... gave up alot of things for him too... but now we are good friends... play games and go out to play pool together... ya... we could do that too... aft i give up on you...

PaPa... i never forget abt you... i'm so sorry i did so many things to hurt you cuz of andy... i know sorry cannot sure what i have done to you... but... i'm gonna give up on andy... i'm determined... you will help me along rite?

this is our song

2004-11-21T13:11:00.000+08:00

was reading the "teenage workbook" last night... finally finished it... such a funny and romantic book... you could hear me going "awww" and "hahahaha" the whole night... i'm not mad la... the book is outrageously mad... haha... the "teenage textbook" also just as good as its sequel... haha... on the last chapter... sissy and daniel had a song of their own... so sweet... i think it was "the passing of the april shower" which is also the title of the book... haha... it reminds me of my song with jon... haha.. i dunno how it became our song... just that we were listening to it at the cd shop at great world... yesyes... a very very long long time ago... "eternal flame" by atomic kittens i think... our song... haha... just suddenly thought abt it when i was reading the book yesterday... haha... haiz,... haven been blogging for such a long time... and it seems like there is nth to blog... haha.. oh ya.. on thursday... we watched "the incredibles" haha... really cool show... so funny and incredible... haha... royston is that evil "incredi-boy", leon is "dash", cheryl is "violet", pathom is "mr incredible", dunno who is "elastic women". guess who am i... haha... i'm EDNA MODE!!! haha... funny.. i luv her... so funny... so puny and so french... haha... aft that incredible show.. we went to east coast... the bus kinda broke down... haha... i think the tire burst or something like that... haha... but it carried on the trip... then we went over to east coast.. then we rented bikes... yeah... went cycling to the ends of the park.... alot of us got hurt... haha.. not alot la.. kusu(lai qiang) fell down and hurt his knee... cheryl scrapped her elbow... cuz darius wanted a hi-5... so kusu braked... couldn't balance so fell and cheryl fell cuz of him too... haiz... so cool to go cycling... i dunno how to cycle so we took the double seater ones with darius then pathom took over later... haha... after that... we went to sit bumper cars!!! haha... so fun... bump! bump! bump! i almost got thrown off... i was video taping the whole thingy down while leon (cuz he needed an adult to sit with him) drove the "vehicle" wow... 3 bucks for such a short ride... haiz.. lame.. but still fun... then we just sat by the seaside while pathom and darius took leon for a ride... aft that we went to macs... ate... quarreled with pathom... ya... he apologized to me the next day... but i heck care and quarreled with him again... cuz i really can't stand it... he is always getting angry with me... what the hell... let him get angry forever then... i dun bother abt him... back to the story... then we went to take bus... then turns out that we are on the wrong side of the road and i went to put in money for the bus fare already... he didn't want to return me the money... shit-to-fied... then he still scold me... say that we should have asked first before boarding and paying... what the hell... they told me that the bus will go one big round first mah... how would i know that it is two diff ways... so we went over to the other side the bus stop... and waited and waited for the bus to come... and made a new fren... he smokes... but he told us that its because he was stress... i understand... and i told him that... he was really friendly... haha... nice guy... then we boarded the bus and we went over to tiong... i almost fell alseep on darius's shoulder... haha... while hugging the soft plush winnie that royston and rachel gave to me... thanxs for all the pressies ppl!!! there was no more mrt when we reached tiong... wanted to walk home... but darius treated me to cab... haha... so nice of him.. then we went back... then we counted the amount of stars there was in the milk bottle filled with stars that andy gave to me... there was 131 stars... haha... my maid said that if it was an even number then he does not luv me... if it was an odd number... he luvs me... haha... for fun one la... then later on... i read darius's msg from pathom and to cheryl... got angry and chased darius out of the house.. but everything is ok now... ok... haha... yesterday he and jeric came to my house... aft we went to imm and return rachel her cam... then we watched "swimming pool" haha... supposed to be erotic and blah blah... but it was plain boring cuz darius and jeric keep complaining that it was boring and keep forwarding to find the more "interesting" parts... then we watched the first cd of "hi-dharma 2" haha... i think that is how you spell it... then darius didn't want to go home... but jeric wasn't feeling well... so had to rush him back... even though he was very reluctant... haha...
this is our song... "eternal flame" do you still remember?

i feel weird

2004-11-16T21:11:00.000+08:00

hey ppl!!! i'm back home... haha... i feel so weird to be home... like so diff like that... haha... must have stayed at my aunt's house for too long a time... haha...guess what is the occasion today...yes!!! its my birthday!!!! yeah!!! so cool!!! finally this day has come.. but it doesn't turn out the way i wanted it to... was thinking of spending this day with the one i luv... but... haiz... dun tok abt it... so upsetting... nvm... i'm going out with darius later... try to have fun lor... haha... today i went with felix to the hospital for check-up... haha... carry him until my hand pain... suan sia... haha... i'm thinking of you now... can't go on blogging...

be away for a month

2004-11-14T14:27:00.000+08:00

bye my friends... bye my family... bye everyone... i'll be away for a whole month or maybe longer... cuz i need to go look aft my aunt and her children... remember felix and felicia from the previous blog entry? ya... felix and his mum has been discharge and her husband is going to america to work for one and a half month... and i am going there to be a maid for a whole month... haha... or maybe longer... so sad... ppl... dun miss me k? but i will miss you all alot... nvm... my handphone will be turned on... 24 hours... even though dun have money... but msg me la... then i will call you all... tok on the phone... until my aunt calls me to do some stuff... yeah... wun be blogging either... my aunt's com isn't working... so this blog will be stagnant... maybe i'll blog in my notebook first la.. then i come back and blog... see first la.. haiz... feel so sad to leave everyone... wanna cry liao... i wun really be allowed to go out... maybe for 2mlw... and tuesday... cuz its my birthday liao mah...yeah... happy birthday to me... haha... well... got to go pack my stuff now... miss everyone... ahhhhhhhhhh... so sad... haha... bye bye...

*~[ WiLl aLwAyS Be aRoUnD FoR YoU }~*

a day out of the ordinary... like real...

2004-11-13T00:05:00.000+08:00

On the 12th November 2004... at 12:45am Felix Ang was borned into this world by the help of the doctors... nurses... his mum... his dad... and his two cousins and sister's praying... it was painful but worthwhile.. that cute little boy of 3.4pounds came into our world and brighten up our lifes... such a fragile yet beautiful creature was he... awwww... my heart melted when i saw him... hey... thats my cousin you know... soo cute... haha... his name reminds us of felix the cat... his sister,felicia... who is currently just five years of age gave him the name... isn't it sweeet... haha... well... i was joking to my uncle that nobody would laugh at his name and saying that he is felix the cat cuz the kids in his generation would be watching some funny thingy that i saw at tiong today which darius says teaches us how to fart... haha... well... yesterday night... or should i say this morning? my elder sis cried cuz she said that she felt the presence of god which brought felix into this world... haha... i dunno abt it... but i think that its great that he was born... then i stayed over at my auntie's house cuz i needed to look aft felicia while her mum is in the hospital and her dad needs to work... hahaha... then i went out with darius aft fetching felicia to the hospital to visit her mum... then we went to outside lido to play the halo 2 x-box thingy... actually... i was just watching darius play and was kinda getting drench... okok... its was just drizzling... then i started to suffer from motion sickness and we went to get jonathan's b day pressie... haha... got him this cap from ripcurl which really ripped a hole in my pocket... haha... $24.90... chum chum... most expensive present i ever bought... haiz... cuz i really didn't kno what to buy mah... then darius say that must buy cap or shirt... then i went to check it out... and it was quite expensive.... so i had to get $30 from my mum which was the left over from my $100 incentives... ok... happily... we made our way down to ck tangs... met up with my ah gong... brandon... haha... sick still can work leh... still can pull my hair and make fun of me... so bad... haha... the new deco of ck tangs is really very nice... so pretty and wow... hahaha... really put me into the shopping spirit.... until i saw the prices... haha... then we made our way down to plaza sing... on the way.. we met leon and the gang... actually i didn't know it was him... until he told me on msn... wah... he shouted my name soo loudly... but i was like... .... who called me? then we watched the teens model search 2004 until i stand until leg very pain then we went over to tiong... met up with andy... went around tiong... haha... go popular see the video on how to learn to fart... haha... maybe you dun get it... but i'm sure the two of them will get it... haha... then walk around tiong with my teddy... haha... actually i walk through bukit batok,orchard road and tiong with it... haha... cuz i just came from my auntie's house last night... had to bring my bao bei along... or else i cannot sleep... haha...everyone was staring... so pai seh... then bye bye... go home liao... haha... then darius come my house... then me and my small sis go bully him... hahaha... so weak... haha... no la.. actually quite strong leh... haha...must go liao... see ya... buai...

*~[AnOthEr 3 mOrE daYs]~*

cousins get together

2004-11-11T17:44:00.000+08:00

hahaha... my cousins are all over my house... haha... two only la... lovena is here... haha... is not ribena la... its lovena... hahaha... so cute name rite? she is primary three but damn hyper active... tok alot of crap one... then felicia... who is 5 years old... is here too... cuz her mum is going to the hospital to give birth to her younger bro... haha... so she is here so that her father can go look aft her mum without having to drag her along... hahaha... if the baby comes a few days late... then felicia can stay for a few more days and the baby can be born on my b day... yeah!!! i'm soo bored... all i am doing now is blogging and listening to my 5566 songs... haha... wang ren fu rulez!!! haha... if you watch wan quan yu le... which i have not watched for a long long time... you will see that funny and adorable side of him.... ahhhhhhhhhh... so cute... and s'pore idol... they are having the asia songs "dunno what it" thingy... i think slyvester is singing jay chou's songs... yeah... both of them match.... haha... i dunno what the hell i'm toking abt now... life is so boring... not like when i had to go to sch.... and i could travel around s'pore and see diff stuff and come home to blog and destress... now i'm just stressed that i have nth to do... no work... still looking... so if you see any places where they have job spaces... take it down and tell me k? thanxs... i'm kinda desperate... cuz i wanna go on a shopping spree... haha... i'm lame... haha... felicia was just asking her father to remember to get her toothbrush and strawberry flavoured toothpaste... haha... isn't she cute...

*~[AnOtHeR 5 MoRe DaYs]~*

at papa's house

2004-11-10T15:08:00.000+08:00

hiyah ppl!!! i'm blogging at my papa's house.. hahaha... yeah! why am i here? cuz i bo liao mah... haha... went to work today... but the uncle's wife was there... so she asked me to go back home... anyway... i didn't wan to be there too... the uncle not happy with me mah... cuz i everytime take leave... hahaha... then leave him all alone to work... nvm... i quit liao... he not happy mah... then i look at him... also not happy.. so dun see each other anymore la.. good for him... good for me too... yeah... well... dunno what is my papa doing... siao one... kepp looking at me blog... abit pian tai rite? haha... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... today i saw tamagotchisssss... ahhhhhhhhhhh.... so cute... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... i used to have one... i think it was penguin... then i was showing my younger sister some "magic"... so i put it into the cold water and took it out... and ta-dah! it was still in working condition... hahaha... and my sis was so amazed... so i went off to the toilet... but i reminded her not to put it into the water anymore... so lalalala... i came back... and to my horror... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... my sister left my tamagotchi in the cold water... ahhhhhhhhh... and when i took it out... ahhhhhhhhhhh... i was spoilt already... damn it... okok... i know penguins are supposed to be able to survive in cold waters.... but mine was special... so sad... well... i still have a whole long list of things to buy... haha... yesterday... went out with darius and ivan... half way went out with nevil too... me and ivan were at the precious tots shop in ps... and there was the happy house section.... and omg... the new happy house bag was soo nice... its was light pink with this girl's face on it... omg... it was so pretty... i fell in love with it at first sight.. couldn't take my eyes off it for a whole minute... i didn't even want to leave the shop without it... but it was $26.90... and i only had $15.... so sad... so i had to left the shop empty handed... haiz... it was damn pretty la... then later in the night... i fell in love at first sight again... at orchard og... the wallet section... omg... the wallet says"girls rock" or something like that.... it was so nice... omg... but it was $9.90... and since i had $15 why didn't i buy it? haiz... cuz i went to macs before that... ahhhhhhhhhhh... tupid me... so sad.... haiz... yaya... i'm just like what my papa said... can't be satisfied... but i rarely fall in love with stuff... and i only buy things that i fall in love with or like at first sight... if i dun like it at first... then i wun even look at it a second time... thats why im fast shopper.. hehehe... okok... papa complain liao... see ya... >_<

*~[ AnOtHeR 6 MoRe DAyS ]~*

should be working now

2004-11-09T12:20:00.000+08:00

haiz... yayaya... should be at work now... slogging my guts out... but haiz... this little girl/piggy very tired la... not feeling very good... haha... abit dizzy... haha... really la... who says sick ppl cannot laugh one... tupid... i shall show you that sick ppl can laugh... alot! hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
okok... sick person tired liao... dun laugh liao... well.. its just another morning.. when i have nth to do... and i come here to make a fool of myself... yayayaya...i'm a big fat fool... "hahaha"... i'm "sooo" laughing until i drop on to the floor and die..."hahahaha" well... i'm really damn bored... nth to do... should i go and work? then earn enough money to get pressies for my dear birthday frens? or should i stay at home and rest as a pressie to myself? haha... dunno... my sis got a new gameboy!!! ahhhhh.... yes... its the gameboy advance sp.... hahaha... got colour one!!! ahhhhhhhhh... so bloody irritated... why dun i get something expensive too? its like... just cuz she did "very well" for her exams and cuz she spoiled the watch my mum gave her for her b day... and that christmas is coming... that doesn't mean that she can get such an expensive gameboy... not fair... wahhhhh... :'( then since my b day is coming... deepavali is coming...christmas is coming... new year is coming... and labour day is coming... hari raya puasa is coming... hari raya haji is coming... good friday is coming... all the festives all coming liao.. then can she get me a digicam? no? ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... not fair rite? shit-to-fied... haiz... nvm... i'll go play her gameboy since she is not at home... muahahaha!!!

i give up...

2004-11-08T18:33:00.000+08:00

hiaz... i give up liao... today no business sia... then i just sit there at stare into space.... second day at work... still no business... uncle said that yesterday... there was alot of customers... earn abt 500+ leh... wah lao... i must be jinxed... hiaz... i took two days leave and they earn so much... hiaz... oops... its haiz... aaron teach me one... cannot hiaz... must haiz... whats the diff??? haha... i dunno too... today is melissa's b day....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELISSA !!!!
haha... sorrie that ur name is abit light coloured... cuz i tot you suit the light colour kinda stuff... haha... what do you wan for ur b day??? cd? clothes? wat? hiaz... tell me asap ok? well.. then aft that... it would be jon's b day on the 13th and mine and my uncle's on the 16th... yeah! so cool... yaya... hardly can you find a relative that has the same b day as you... my family has alot... some are even three on one day... haha... so cool rite? haiz.... mine is coming... i'm waiting to celebrate that day with that special someone... who isn't free on that day... so i dun bother to ask... i'll just see how lor... if he/she doesn't do anything... wah lao... i severe ties with that person man...yeah... dun really have alot of things to blog nowadays... i'm working... and i'm like half dead when i get back... then this little piggy needs to sleep.. eat and bath... then aft that i'll be on the phone... communicating with the outside world... muhahaha... so long never go to town liao... haiz... i wanna go bugis to buy clothes... the clothes there very nice... hahaha... but need to save enough money to go shoppng spree first... ya... save like 100... which is two weeks worth of work... wah lao... jsut like that then the money go down the drain liao... hahaha...*flush* haha... i'm lame... well... soon i can go shopping!!!! yeah!!

*~[CoLoUrS Of mY RaInBoW RiVeR]~*

hey

2004-11-07T13:34:00.000+08:00

sorrie... my blog has gone made again... nth is appearing... so i had to change the template to a ready made one... so shit-to-fied... hiaz... i'm soo lazy to blog... so tired... slept at 3 plus last night... cuz darius fell asleep at my house... and didn't wan to go home... then when he left... i went online to look for andy... haha.. lame rite? in the middle of the night go look for ppl... hiaz.. then i couldn't wake up this morning to go to work... so i took another day leave... then i think i will have to go back 2mlw... sheesh... but nvm... i ask cheryl to get me an office job liao... hope i can get it... the pay is 20 a day... 100 a week... so cool rite? if i work for my mum... i only get 50 a week and i always get scalded by hot water and stuff... haha... i'm very lazy one la... i need those laid back kind of job... haha... anyway the pay is quite good mah... rite anot? yaya... one month is 400 bucks leh... can go buy handphone liao!!! haha... i'm lame la... dun even know if i will get the job... i think we are goin to sentosa for my b day... but i dun think i'm goin to ask my sc frens along... sorrie... cuz they can't mix with my frens from outside... yaya... ppl always look down on my frens... but i dun care... they are still my frens... =P okok... nth to blog liao... i want to blog like the other day... but... haha... i'm goin out... haha... see ya around... buai...

this song is meant for you

2004-11-04T23:00:00.000+08:00

hiaz... this is my five time blogging today... i'm damn bored... hiaz... this song by Avril Lavigne... so much for my happy ending... its all i feel now... maybe i feel more then that... but i think it expresses most of it... nice to have a song that does that... cool... haha.. yes... you were everything that i tot i knew and wanted... hiaz... but i was just gone like that... cuz of ur dumb frens... exact situation... hiaz... wat a happy ending man... hiaz... i give it to you... it depends if you wanna give it back to me... i know i am disturbing you with all those disturbing msgs that you dun even reply to... hiaz.. i'm soo sorry... but as i have said... i can't keep my feelings to myself... i need to tell someone... and the only one who deserves to hear it is you... hiaz... i just quarreled with aaron for the dunno how many time cuz of you... he got angry cuz i dun like him... and i like you... and that im rushing him to find someone better... hiaz... i told him that i did not do it for you... cuz you dun even like me... but he just went offline.... hiaz... his angry with me now... hiaz... i lost many frens cuz of this... ok.. i didn't lose them... we just suddenly became very distant... aft i broke up with you... things got much better... almost like last time... but they all like to ask me similar qns once in awhile... like... which guy do you like now? do you still luv your ex? hiaz... so i just give them the ans la... what else to do? lead them to the wrong path... nonono... i dun wan to... hiaz.. i'm fustrated...
so much for my happy ending...

my song to you...

2004-11-04T22:32:00.000+08:00

My song to you:

So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh, oh...

Let's talk this over
It's not like we're dead
Was it something I did?
Was it something You said?
Don't leave me hanging
In a city so dead
Held up so high
On such a breakable thread

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

CHORUS
You were everything, everything that I wanted
We were meant to be, supposed to be, but we lost it
All of the memories, so close to me, just fade away
All this time you were pretending
So much for my happy ending
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
Oh oh, oh oh

You've got your dumb friends

I know what they say
They tell you I'm difficult
But so are they
But they don't know me
Do they even know you?
All the things you hide from me
All the shit that you do

You were all the things I thought I knew
And I thought we could be

CHORUS

It's nice to know that you were there
Thanks for acting like you cared
And making me feel like I was the only one
It's nice to know we had it all
Thanks for watching as I fall
And letting me know we were done

CHORUS X 2

oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh oh, oh oh
oh oh, oh oh, oh...

he told me he will luv me forever

2004-11-04T15:30:00.000+08:00

this is my third entry of the day... now you can see how bored i am... haha... tell you a little something... there was this person who i have mentioned in my previous entry... he promised me that he will luv me forever even though i do not luv him back... but i dunno where is he now... i didn't even know that he changed his number until i saw darius's phone... why did he lie to me? i hate it when ppl lie to me... and i can't see through it... until now then did i realise that everyone except my family who says that they like me and will luv me forever (mostly are guys) and take care of me... are just lying... i hate it... its like... lying... ya... lying... makes me lose all my faith in you... i feel so sad now... its raining... and the radio is playing some really sad music but its mostly jay chou so i dun mind... it dark and cold... i feel so lost... i got no one to tok too... only got my blogger to blog to... and later when ppl read it... then will they ask me am i ok... and usually by that time... i'm ok abt it liao... and im just cheerful and bubbly... i am a person who can't keep my emotions to myself... i have to let the person who made me sad or angry to know what they did... i very seldom hide my feelings... even if i do... i will go home and confide it to my papa ivan and my real mummy... who really luvs me? can someone tell me? i dun think anyone does... i msg ppl... all i get is my money getting lesser... no reply... nothing... i feel like i'm being made a fool of... luv you soo much... as a fren... or maybe as something closer... but you all just ignore me... with no rhyme nor reason... usually i have to ask before i get any ans... hiaz... i'm still truamatized (is this how you spell it?) whenever i read that breakup msg... whenever i look at it... i start wanting to cry... *SObX* but ppl think that im stupid... why dun i just forget abt that person... its hard... its really hard... its harder than getting all A's for ur exams... some ppl would understand how i feel... some ppl haven gone through it... they dunno... at first... i didn't know it was that hard too... thats why i always ask ppl to forget... forget... but its so hard... especially when you all have been together for like almost two weeks... and ur feelings for each other have grown soo much during that time... even though it was just two dates... hiaz... i'm so stupid... i even went to ask if we still had a chance to get back together... i'm so stupid... no one likes me... he is just playing with me... he is just taking me as a toy to play and then just drop off when he feels like it... well... thats what ppl say... but before i heard that... i always tot that he luved me alot... that he would never let me go... even though i always complain that he is very quiet but i luv him alot... i dunno who to trust... my heart or ppl who know him better than i do... hiaz... i dunno... just hope he will take care of my darling slumbers properly... and that if he really doesn't like me jsut tell me so... so that i dun have to wait for you like an idiot... i know that even if you tell me that you dun like me... i'll just be heartbroken and i still wun forget abt you... hiaz... maybe if i find someone better than you... or someone like you... but... hiaz... there is no one like you... no one who makes me luv them so madly that i can't sleep at night... crying... missing you... hiaz.. ya.. i'm dumb... dumb... maybe i'm just chi qing... i dunno... maybe i am jsut blind... i dunno... i hope that now i am starting to work... i will get to take my mind off you and hopefully stop luvin and missin you... like with jonathan.. but i didn't luv jonathan as much as i did to you... oh sheesh... what am i toking abt? sorrie... i must have gotten abit to far... hiaz... see ya...

*~[LoViN YoU MiSsIn YoU]~*

i'm bored...

2004-11-04T14:05:00.000+08:00

i'm so damn bored... so this is my second entry in just three or four hours... lalala... there is nothing to do... so i shall just blog the whole day.... lalalala... hiaz.. chantel and val must have just finish watching the princess diaries 2 by now... hiaz... why am i so stupid to refuse their invitation... idiot.. or else i will be out by now... having fun and stuff... hiaz.. i wanna go watch princess diaries too.. lala... but all my frens... hiaz... those that i wanna ask... hiaz.. dun wan to ask la... cuz some still sleeping... some i dun think they wan to go out with me... hiaz... i feel so suffocated... yesterday i got this person... erm... lets call the person "ass"... ok... so this "ass" knew that i went out with darius and jeric... then dunno what the hell he wan la.. then called like two times to ask darius to get me home... and still can scold bad word... wah lao... its like only 10 la.. darius knows that i dun wan to go home mah... then he told "ass" that... but "ass" not happy la... keep asking him to get me home... hiaz... then i told him say that i did not wan to go home la... and blah the blah... then he never disturb liao... so irritating... its my life la.. i do whatever i wan to do... why must you interfere... then he msged me this morning saying that he doesn't like me cuz im too young... that he just treat me like his youngest sister.. like do i care? no i dun care... he say until like so mian qiang like that... like he is sacrificing hinself for me... like i like him like that and he wants me to let go off him.. hiaz... i can't stand him... he is such a sensitive freak... idiotic... someone get him off my back... hiaz... now i know why he has so little frens... he says that he hate ppl to ji siao him and his frens one... but what does he do? he also go ji siao ppl... siao liao... the world siao liao... remember... in the bible i think... it said... dun treat ppl they way you dun wan them to treat you... its quite true rite? like darius la.. everytime oso follow this rule one... siao... so if someone hit him he will hit them back... actually all humans are like that one la... so remember that sentence from the holy bible...actually the "ass" is quite nice to me la... but he is very overprotective... he likes me... i know that... and he just said all those stuff in a fit of anger and he is trying to forget abt me that way... he knows that i like someone else... actually... almost everyone knows who i like... but i dun think that person does... shall not say the name... cuz that person always come and read my blog one... haha... yaya... hiaz... i just msged jonathan... ask him to go watch princess diaries with me... haha... i got his new number from darius phone... muahahaha... im so evil... well... but he never reply... he hates me la... i also dunno how we lost contact... weird... haha... but he is a very nice guy la... very quiet... now ah beng liao... dunno if he is still that nice guy i used to know anot... someone tell me that he is...

it is coming... it is coming...

2004-11-04T11:40:00.000+08:00

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... guess wat? wat? wat? wat wat? wat wat wat? wat wat wat wat? haha... taken from shark tale... haha... ok... if you haven watch it... then you wouldn't understand what the hell im toking abt... but ya... this quote will give you abit of information on shark tale the movie.... haha... funny show... you should watch... it... come one... snap my fin... snap! haha... okok... i know all of you are like *BluR* now... haha... so i shall not make fun of you and shark tale anymore... hahahaha... but the movie really damn funny la... haha... then princess diaries 2 is coming out today.... ahhhhh... but some ppl say that its not nice... i dunno... but i wan to watch... seems quite funny... maybe i should go watch it today... hmmmmm... who shall i ask along... sheesh tough choice.. haha... too many ppl to ask liao... oh shit... val just called me to ask me out just now... but i told her that i can't.... haha... actually she called me when i was sleeping... then i was very tired... so i tot that i cannot make it already... so i said... sorry maybe some other time... shit... should have gone out with them... val is soo funny... she kept laughing when we were watching the doll master... but quite true la... the show was quite funny... hahahaha... then on 10 november... bride and prejudice is coming out... yeah! bollywood manz!!! if im not wrong... its abt an american guy who fell in luv with a very pretty indian lady... i dunno how to spell her name... damn long la... lazy to check too... but i luv her... she is soo pretty... she won miss universe before leh... wat do you think... you just go watch the show and find out la... there will also be alot abt the indian culture and dance!!! wheeeee!!! indian movies are damn nice... cuz of the dance... and they are always so touching... *SnIfF sNiFf* Bollywood rocks...

eating my breakfast now... dun disturb....

yummy yummy.. "i'm very full" says my tummy... haha... it rhymes... hahaha.. keke... guess what occasion it is in another... 12 days... ahhhhhh... tick tock tick tock... time is running out... guess... yes! its my birthday... yeah!!! im so happy... i will be 14 by then and like how jeric said... i can watch NC14 shows... haha... thats just a joke... dun take it so seriously... haha... well.. im so happy... let me guess... you haven bought me my presents yet... you naughty naughty ppl... so bad.. humph... haha... actually.. if i didn't get you a gift for ur birthday... like many many ppl... you dun really have to give me... cuz it makes me feel very bad that you gave me a present but i didn't... haha... i still have my "liang xing" you know... but if it turns out that nobody got me any presents then nvm also la.. i'll just be disappointed for a few days... then i'll be ok liao... but some one got me a present long before ur time... in a land far away... haha... just joking... but ivan.. my dearest papa... got me two tixs to watch "winnie the pooh in the prefect day" ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... so cool rite? thanxs papa... luv ya... but i still dunno who to ask leh... should i ask winnie the pooh luvers or wat? hiaz.. nvm... still got another 11 days to the show mah... haha... i can't believe i get to go... but hiaz... i wan to go for the jay chou concert... dunno if i can save up enough money from working to buy the tix in time to watch the concert.. hiaz... i dun think so liao... so sad... hiaz... hiaz.. hiaz... nvm la... there will be another chance... maybe a few years later la... nvm.. can start saving up for his next concert... if he doesn't come to s'pore again... then i'll save enough to go to his concert in other countries... wah lao.. i so hardcore... but jay chou is really very good... his concert is going to be soo great! hiaz... hiaz... hiaz... oh ya... that day... the concert is held... it happens to be someone's birthday... who arh? i forgot... can someone tell me... im so sorry that i forgot.. forgive me k? i got sml la.. hehe...

its coming.. and i can't wait...

disappointed and disappointment

2004-11-01T17:41:00.000+08:00

lets just tok abt disappointed first... i was very disappointed as miss belle tan didn't turn up as a judge for our talent time today... and she kept tellling us a few days before that she is going to sacrifice her monday and wake up early in the morning to watch us perform.. so we must do a good job and not disappoint her... but she disappointed us first... hiaz... i was soo hoping that she would be there and cheer on us... but she wasn't... maybe she is sick... or maybe she doesn't wan to be embarrased by our last minute kind of perforamance... hiaz... but at least we got consolation for the open catergory... which was very good for us liao...but the price wasn't only food but very horrible tasting biscuits... hiaz... dunno what kind of shit prize is that... everyone was so bimbotic today... they all wore such nice clothes... mini skirts... make up... like ewww... only our class was very casual... and we all tried not to wear jeans cuz ms heng doesn't like us to wear jeans... she is a vert traditonal kind of principle la... but most of the performance was very good... especially 2sy's performance... becky and camille can sing soo well... omg... i was soo shocked... and envious of course...humph... haha... then aft that... me... amanda and charlotte went to waffle town... eat and eat... yum yum... then the whole place started to fill up with scgs girls... haha... so funny... then me and amanda had to go meet jolynn at taka but cuz it was still early so we went to borders first... on the way to the bus stop on the other side of the road... guess who i saw... bryan tan... ewww... that black guy that everyone hates... especially me... that guy who accused me of breaking up ppl's relationship when he too was trying to break them up but not so obviously... anyway... i wasn't even trying to break them up... i was just stating some facts that liars like bryan tan can't lie abt... wadever... then he was like shocked.. and i was shocked too... and that i just said..." f*** off" then he was like.... ..... .... then aft a few seconds then did he replied some gibberish stuff... disgusting guy... he lied that he was in sch tennis team... he lied that he has a gf in jc... he lies abt everything... once he told such a big huge lie that almost costed me a relationship with my god bro... but luckily everything is over now.. or at least i think so... cuz he is still spreading around rumors that im a monster and what the hell he says... and he says that im spreading ard rumors abt him... *ahem*... he is like so out of my life now... i dun even bother abt him... why would i even waste my precious time and saliva on gossiping and spreading rumors abt some freak that isn't worth it... i can't stand acs barker guys... so proud and egoistic... think they can do everything... think that they are the best... but plzzz... look around you... there are lots more ppl who are smarter and more charismatic then you all are... okok... not all la.. some ppl from acs barker are nice.... like leon... whom i think is still angry with me... leo... whom i dun know at all... but seems nicer than other ppl... nicklaus... nice guy too... poo siang... nice friendly guy... nicholas... my god bro... super nice guy... very caring... haha... then last but not least... my little sea monster!!! ahhhhhhhhh... gabriel... i luv him to bits... he is soo cute... but always get bullied in sch... arghhh... bloody ass ppl out there... watch out!!

why am i going on and on abt some -tupid- stuff when im supposed to tok abt disappointed... hiaz... lets just go on to disappointment... hiaz... today was ,aaron, another one of my god bro's birthday... a very sweet and nice guy which i have know for almost a year now... but never really met up with him... just like tok to him on the phone and stuff... it was his birthday... so send him this really sweet message on how much i luv him and oso not to forget his fav *MuAhS* haha... he is always pestering me to give him that muah thingy... and he was oso pestering me to act cute last night... i dunno what was wrong with him... but he was very lame and corny last night... well... then... he asked me what did i do today (which was yesterday) ... then i was like... i went to watch a movie... then he asked me wat movie and who did i go with... erm... then i told him i went with andy to watch shark tale... and he was like... "you went out with your ex!!!" then i was like... ya... then it was like... cold... then he said that he was tired and stuff... and he sounded really uphappy... i was soo surprised that he was soo upset that i went out with my ex... i felt so guilty making upset on his b day... hiaz... then we put down the phone and went to bed... before that... i was toking to pathom... i was soo afriad to tell him that i went out with andy to watch shark tale... cuz i promised pathom that i will watch it with him... but i was kinda desperate in asking andy out... -tupid- me and cuz i had no other reason in asking him out... so i had to use that excuse... that aft that... i told pathom that i watched the movie cuz my small sis was pestering me to go bring her watch the movie... which was quite true...jus that my sis wasn't pestering me to bring her to watch the movie... but pestering me to bring her along... hiaz... i feel so bad that i lied... damn it... so i promised him that i'll go accompany him the whole of this thursday... haha... well... i dunno... sad sad...

i just came home...

2004-10-31T20:23:00.000+08:00

hiaz... i just came home from a so called date with andy... guess who asked who out... yayaya... i asked him out... you all are so smart... make me feel so inferior... haha... wadever... ok... so we are back to normal frens... and it seems even more normal than normal now... hiaz... you know something? evertime i stand behide him... i got the feeling that i wanna just wrap my arms around him and never let him go... but... ya... its kinda dumb... he would think that im mad and probably just scold me for being such a pervert... maybe... i dunno... we were freezing each other again... i didn't tok much... he... ok... he toked more than i did... but it was less than what we actually said online and when we were dating... everything feels so damn cold... if you actually ever went out with us before.. you can actually feel the coldness ( which feels like the air con at 16 degrees celsius, maybe less ) haha... i dun think there will be a chance we will ever be back together again... maybe we really weren't fated and we were just making a mistake in going together... i dunno... its over... haha... can you believe that he gave me a lolly on our first date alone... and he said that if i like it then he would give it to me everytime we when out together... hiaz... maybe he forgot... well... at least the movie,shark tale, was the best part... even though we had to sit at the second row from the front... ouch... my neck hurts... its was how we were sitted... [me] [my sis] [andy] yayaya... my youngest sis went along... but at least i had someone to tok to and to rub hands with when i got so cold (this cold happens to be refering to the air con) haha... the movie was so damn funny... laughing all the way... you should go watch it... hahaha... dunno what to say now... just goin to eat my dinner and see wat happens... really missing him now... want to tok to him... but... hiaz... lets not tok abt it... see ya... be reporting back to you 2mlw on our great talent time performance...

I FeLL sIcK CuZ YoU dUn LuV mE AnYmOrE...

2004-10-31T10:51:00.000+08:00

hiaz... im down with flu and a little cough... why? cuz you dun luv me anymore... :( and why do you not luv me anymore... i dunno... maybe cuz you have found someone else... someone prettier... slimmer... better... and is willing to take the initative... maybe cuz you just can't stand me... that im so damn irritating... that im so damn ugly... and you can't even go out with me in peace... something like tt rite? hiaz... im such a failure... i am such a bad gf... i can't even make you happier... i just make you have more burdens with my problems... maybe like i said... i owe you something in our past life... and now i have to return it... but how? im can't even do a good job properly.. you know something? i luv to see you smile.. it makes my heart melt instantly... and even though you are very quiet... it still seems so nice and warm with you around... but now... everything... is diff... you have left me... for that one little thing... which happened before we became together.... which means i had not betrayed you... but you... maybe cuz you dun trust me... maybe cuz you wan to take this as an excuse to leave me here... all alone.. maybe maybe... ppl... say that you dun actually love me... that you are just playing with me... and thats all... thats why we breaked... thats why it all ended so fast... but i choose to believe you... i choose to believe that you still luv me... but it is like... when i msg you... like yesterday night... all you gave me was "we are still frens." like whats with the fren thingy... you know i dun wanna be frens... and you ask me whats the diff? if you have luved me as much as i luved you... you would have felt the diff... i have been crying almost everytime i think abt you... the times we had together... but it has all ended... jsut like that... hiaz... you say you wanna be with me and that you will lend me ur shoulders when i cry... but where are you now? its like ivan is always there for me when i cry... you were never ever with me when i cry... maybe cuz i'll go call ivan when im upset... thats cuz he is closer to me... and he knows how to console me... and sometimes... so miraculously... he will call or msg me when im upset... but you... hiaz... i dunno... maybe you dun dare to call me.. maybe your busy... maybe you just dun wan to,... i dunno... its ur mind... i dunno what you wan.. what you think... i just have to sit here... and guess it all the time... maybe you really dun luv me anymore...

hiaz... ppl think that im trying to break up their relationship... but im not... why do i always get into this kind of trouble... hiaz... i do not try to break ppl up... i just tell ppl what is the right thing to do... and whats the fact and truth... if both of you truely luv each other... you all wun be shaken by what i have said... i haven be shaken by all the rumors that have been going ard abt andy... cuz i luv him... so thats the truth... if you all can't even have the basics of a relationship.... like eye contact.. ad be willing to tell the truth and have trust in each other... what the point of being boy-girl frens? especially when you treat each other like frens... when a person is not willing to open up to you... it means that she or he is not used to you... you have to try to make the person more comfortable... if you try to hold her hand.. and she moves away... its either cuz she doesn't like you or she just wants to lets things go slowly and not that fast... open up to each other on how you feel abt certain stuff... dun be like... everything "anything" "i dunno"... bgf are not like tt... they are open to each other... even though that may cause alot of quarrels... quarrels can let you know and learn if that person really luvs you and what are his or her dislikes... hiaz... im really not trying to break the two of you up... just... maybe its not time... give both of you sometime to get closer first... before you all start the bgf thing... anyway... its sec three already... both of you need to concentrate on your studies... i really wan to see my best fren and my son to do well and get good grades and maybe aft sec 4 or wat... you all can be together... let time do the job...

*~[LuV iS So FuStRAtInG bUt WhY dO wE aLL sTiLL lUv 2 bE lUVeD N LuV]~*

i got my choice...

2004-10-30T09:56:00.000+08:00

i wanted to get into double science... specifically bio and chem... but i didn't do really well... so i had to change my choice to bio... yes... it is a single science... and it is not very good to be in single science... melissa says that it is very "dui lian" to tell ppl that your in single science... but i dun think so la... since i rarely have frens who are also in express.. hiaz... its cuz our sch standard is very high... not like acs barker... wah lao.. their exam paper hor... chum chum.... melissa do liao... can get full marks leh... see how easy it is? ok la.. i'm not saying that their sch is not good or wat lor... but it is really that the sch is trying to let the students pass to easily... acs independent wun do that... so you know where the true smarter ones are...haha... ok... so i got into bio... and im also taking full lit and history... its all that i wanted... except for the bio and chem part... i knew i could not get into bio and chem... especially when i failed my science rite? but hey... i did quite well for science last year... ppl say that it is mr hong... our science teacher... but i dun think he is to be blame la... maybe partially is his fault la... but he would be a better private tutor than sch teacher... haha... ok... so im in single science now... sounds like im damn dumb... haha... maybe i am... damn it... but at least i got into full lit and history... i luv history... hope it will pull me up lor...

my stupid phone is not working again... damn it... mummy!!! i want a new flip phone... will you give it to me?? plzzzz? no? why not? i got into sec three.... oh.. you gave me hundred bucks already... oh ya... but i want a new phone... plzzz... hiaz... no use la... my mum wun give me a new phone... nvm.. i'll just bug her everyday.. you know what? i only recieved andy's msg to go watch shark tale yesterday at 4, now... which is like... 18 hours later!!! ahhhhhhhhhh... damn it... aiya... nvm la... damn the phone la... but i was watching doll master at that time... so scary... haha... actually... it wasn't very scary la... valerie still can laugh... haha... and i was the only idiot using my jacket to cover my face... hahaha... melissa use her wallet to cover her face... but not her eyes... haha... its wasn't as scary as the grugde.... cuz i could always guess when the 'thingy" was going to pop out... so i cover my eyes... haha... now i know why it only got two stars and the grudge had four... haha... but they grudge wasn't as funny as the doll master... haha... doll master had alot of funny stuff... i was laughing sometimes too... damn lame la... even though the way they die was very gruesome... and the dolls had this horrible eyes which moves... haha... scary... but there was this ppl at the back of us... the two girls... kept screaming... whether it is scary or not... then when ppl scream... they ask ppl to shut up... stupid... so you can consider watching the grudge if you wan real excitement... but only watch the doll master if you have a not so strong heart... *WiNkS*

got banged down by a car

2004-10-28T17:14:00.000+08:00

"We are sorry to announce that at 3:15pm, 28th October at Tanjong Pagar's Main Road, Charlene Marn aged 13yrs 11 months and 22 days was banged down by a big purple car. Its serial number is S*******. The police are still not sure about what caused the accident but they have put it under "Mishaps"."

Haha... okok.. i only ALMOST got banged down by a big purple car... haha... why??? cuz i looked to the left side of the road... and i didn't look at the right side and i started crossing the road... omg... i got a shock went the car came right at me... so i faster walk and thank god the car saw me and slowed down... haha.. but i was wondering why the driver didn't scold me... haha... he or she must be in a good mood... haha... thanks driver of car plate number "S*******"...

Was supposed to go play pool today with pathom... but he is busy... darius maybe coming over later on to play badminton with me and my youngest sis.. maybe only la.. cuz he need to fetch amanda from sch... then home... then maybe by the time he came over... the sky would have turned dark and we can't play anymore... but i played with my sis just now... soo fun... i improved soo much... but my right arm and shoulder is hurting as i type this... cuz i use too much strength to play liao... but i still have alot to improve on... haha... if im good... maybe i'll join badminton next year... haha... fat hope la... i dun think they will accept a fat ass like me... haha... so i'll just stick to my "private" training...

i am starting to like sports alot... like basketball... which has been my all time fav... and i luv playing pool... thats why i am always pestering ppl to bring me to play pool with them... haha... jonathan got me hooked on to it... haha... ppl! if you are going to play pool.. must chio me k? i wan to play too... but i got no cash.. damn it... haha... i'm also craving to start bowling too... i luv to bowl... its damn fun la... then... lets see.. what other sports do i like... oh ya... tennis... haha... today i was playing with shu mei's racket... and she didn't notice that i took it away until i used it to wake to suying abt half an hour later... haha... then she screamed and came over to take it... haha.. funny girl... well.. tennis... who made me luv it soo much... i got to say that it would be wimbledon... i admired how they could play so well la... even though the story was very predictable and not say very nice la... but ya... i liked how they play and tennis clothing... wah lao... the nicest sportswear ever.... hahaha.. and another factor is... haha... yayya.... melissa lee... the girl that is always drilling into my head all kinds of stuff abt tennis... thanxs girl... for letting me discover this great sport... but i haven't tried playing it yet... maybe we can go for that tennis course you were toking abt some time ago... and one last one... the one that helps you break down lots of calories but lets you do it without sweat and not alot of energy.. SHOPPING!!! (haha.. then sammie and me will do that fingery thingy that they did in white chicks..)

i got promoted to sec three!! yipee!! well... nth to be happy abt... since everyone got promoted... haha... but i'm still happy.. cuz i am going to get my hundred bucks soon... maybe my mum bluffed me... i dunno... but hope she will give it to me 2mlw... so that i can go out with my frens and celebrate our promotion... haha... sounds lame rite? but hey... we are going to have a illegal meeting 2mlw.. at town... so if you see this whole bunch of girls in town... abt 10... ya.. thats us... haha... we are goin to watch... "doll master"!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhhh... i'm soo scared... can i bring my teddy along? opps... cannot... later my teddy come and attack me... like the doll that attacked its mistress in the movie... ahhhhhhhh... i'm so scared... can i dun watch that... hahha... but i wan to watch... but very scared... nvm.... i'll use my jacket again... and sammie will leave only the sleeve of the jacket for me again... haha... want to ask andy they all to go... then more fun... then they all 16 liao mah... then can go play pool or something.. haha...

well... alot of ppl are upset that yenxi got pushed up even though she did soo badly... they said that she got promoted up cuz she fainted in front of ms heng... our principle... i dunno... but i think that it is not fair... cuz if that is the case... then all of us fail la... then go faint and cry like shit in front of ms heng too... then we also dun need study liao... but i knew that yen xi sure studied until very hard one... but dunno why she still did so badly... hiaz.... dunno la... maybe she is just short of luck... while i was full of luck and i could do quite well even though i didn't study much... well... i think it pays to listen in class... cuz i'm more of the kinectic and hearing kind of person... so i am better at my practicals and listening to teacher... haha... i can't study if i just read... hiaz... if got a pretty good memory... thats why i can get full marks for ting xie even though i learn it last minute... the thing is that... the words just fade off aft awhile... dunno if you call that a good memory or bad...

i'll just end here today... hope everyone gets to the stream of their choice... Good Luck!!!

lalalalala...

2004-10-27T18:40:00.000+08:00

hihi... i finally pierced my ear!!! okok... not that i never pierce before just that i pierced a second one on my left ear... haha... soo cool... but... omg... how to go to sch? i dun have another earing the same colour and design one... how how!?! die die... hiaz... use my hair and hide la... haha... jan ooi went with me too... then she pierced a second one on both sides.. haha... i look so weird now... so ah lianish... well... it wasn't as painful as how sammie said it was... it was a like.... hiaz... dunno how to describe... its pain la... but not pain until going to cry liao... sorrie la... you have to forgive sammie for that comment she made... she is a very sensitive person.... i just pat her on the back... then she start screaming that it is very pain... haha... thats what you call the modern "princess and and pea" hahaha... well... then i met pathom.. and the we went to ps... got to the arcade... and guess who we saw?!? andy and darius... omg... okok... i was kinda happy... but andy did not look happy... i think... so i tried not to look their way cuz i tot maybe he doesn't wan to see his ex again... especially with another guy... but anyway... he will just say that its non of his business cuz i am not "related" to him and that he has no right to interfere... haha... yes... thats what he told me last time... haha... dunno la... he like totally didn't even say bye to me la... hiaz... dunno... maybe i'm abit too over sensitive... then i sit there see them eat at yoshinoya... hiaz... pathom was eating for the second time... in a time diff of abt 30 mins only... chum chum... that explains his figure... oops... haha... then he saw the phrase "property of andy" on my arm... shit... but didn't know if he could read it anot... cuz it was fading away... luckily he didn't see the one on my thigh too... haha...well... then we went to bugis to help darius look for some job... the place was at this restaurant with sells jap plus western food... it looked so glommy and dark inside... i didn't really dare to go in... until andy offered the seat inside there to me... haha... so i just sat there and read my "teenage workbook".... which is a very nice and funny book... i read the textbook liao... haha.. both just as nice... haha... well... then at that time... i was soo happy to sit next to andy... but i of course concerntrated more on my book than him... cuz i didn't know what to say and do mah... actually i wanted to ask him if he was going to apply for the job too? but i tot it was kinda lame... so i didn't... then later just nice as i was at the end of chap 3... they finished and i stopped at chap 4... haha.. they really have good timing... haha... then we went to get drinks at cheers... and we shared la... pathom and andy... darius and me... then all of them very weird one... dun ask me... just go out with them next time... then you will get it liao... haha... well... wait... let me eat a few mouths of my dinner first...
mum...
mum...
yum...
today's dinner is really delicious.... haha... oh... ya... so i kept missing my bus... cuz i didn't want to go home soo early... so they left first... then i wanted to walk home... but i... as usual... was too lazy... so i walked to the next bus stop and tok 145 home... haha... then while i was in the bus... i saw this person walking along the street... i tot probably it was a transexual... cuz the person who has long hair walked like a guy.... so i tried to take a look a the person's face... so as the bus passed... omg!!! it was beverly from singapore idol... wah lao... her face damn black la... scary... but i still like her.... cuz she is kinda pretty and sings very well... haha... cool... haha... darius just told me that andy and pathom dun like it when i'm near darius... like... i dunno... they dun seem to mind... haha... well.. me and darius are just close frens... even though i haven forgotten wat he did to me... i still like him as a fren... so i'm just gonna forget abt it... and be frens with him... just be more careful next time... haha... have to go eat finish my dinner now... buai...

its the end...

2004-10-24T09:48:00.000+08:00

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
I WAS TYPING HALFWAY WHEN I PRESSED SOME STUPID BUTTON AND EVERYTHING DISSAPPEAR... SHEESH!!!! NVM... THE IMPORTANT PART OF THE ENTRY IS THAT I BROKE UP WITH MY BF ALREADY AND NOW I'M AVALIABLE.... HAHAHA....

another blog entry

2004-10-22T08:34:00.000+08:00

here i am blogging aft my teacher called to ask why didn't i call the school to tell them that i wasn't going to sch... like... whats the point of calling the sch? waste time and money... oh ya... and saliva... i need those saliva enzymes to break down those starch... yupyup... you need it too... so dun tok so much and spit soo much.. well... decided to pon sch today... cuz there is really nothing to do in sch... so boring.. usually we just go to the library or just sit around and gossip... haha... at least yesterday... we had videos to watch and entertain us.. haha... some ppl fell asleep during the "rise of fire" geo movie... its was kinda boring... but interesting at the same time... cuz it toks abt the formation of the earth.... haha... i didn't really understand but it came from the imax theater thingy and the images they captured were very nice... haha... then we watched abt adolf hitler... which was boring!!! and i still dun get wat he did to his niece... maybe he wants to be like his father who remarried to his niece too... haha.... dunno them la... weird weird one... okok... going to eat breakfast liao... brb....

10 mins later....

hey hey... i'm back... haha.... the bread was delicious... yumyum... where was i??? can't remember... hiaz... supposed to go watch the grudge today... scary... but sammie is in sch... leon... hiaz... he is online... but never reply me... mad person...so i wait till they give me a reply on the situation before i do anything... hiaz... maybe i can go out first... hey.. cool... ya... maybe i should go out first... haha...well.... my plan was to go out with three ppl today... haha... dunno how to juggle all of them well... hiaz... so lets take one in the morning... one aft sammie lets off from sch and the last person... sheesh... oh ya... he canceled it last nite.... haha... ok... so my plan is alright now... ahhhhhhh... my hand hurt... will blog when it gets better... oh ya... the tagboard is right below... so you can go and tag... haha... buai...

i'm dirty...

2004-10-18T17:22:00.000+08:00

ahhhhhhhhhhh... i'm dirty.... why? you ask me why? didn't you know? didn't you see? i've got some itchy thingy on my arm... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... i'm so dirty.. i better go get bath soon... but i got to blog first... so that ppl can read and tag my board with all sorts of rubbish... omg... why do ppl do such things? is it fun? oh ya.. i admit it can be quite fun... but it kinda gets on ppl's nerves sometimes... so ppl... try not to do that again... but arm is already very itchy... if you get on my nerves... i'll get a breakout of rash... and i'll pass it to you... so shhhhhhhh... just read and go... if you wanna tag... say something nice to comfort me on my itch... thanxs... had to stay back to do cip today... cuz stupid me... went to tell them that i didn't do ushering for drama fest... so i should not get that 2 cip hrs... so i got to stay back to type some enrichment programme thingy for the teacher... it was kinda fun... cuz i could use msn... haha... then my small sister.. kept irritating me with her convo.. and her eng was soo damn good.. she even wanted to take my strawberry(which happens to be a soft toy..)as hostage... i can never think of such an excuse that involves such chim english in my entire life... damn it.. i got to take eng classes from my little sis... how embarassing... supposed to go play badmiton with my little sis now... but that girl... so nicely fell alseep... making me soo sleepy too.. *YaWnZ* i need to play badmiton... need to lose some weight.. haha... maybe not some... but alot... haha... well... i'm trying... but there is no one to play badmiton with me... what do you expect me to do? play with myself? you must be mad... haha... unless you wanna come over and play badminton with me... haha...

supposed to go visit andy today... that xiao boy boy... waist and stomach pain... dunno what happen... so worried for him... but i couldn't go today... cuz i had to stay back to do cip and i had to go home at around 5... or else my dad will complain that i'm always not at home... and blah de blah... haha... he saw me at home yesterday morning... and he smiled so brightly... but then when he woke up in the aftnoon... *PoOf* i disappeared... haha... i'm such a naughty little girl... i forgot abt what i wanted to write liao... die die... well... i'll write when i remember... see ya...

liars..

2004-10-16T22:03:00.000+08:00

hey... i'm back.. went out today... from junction 8 to tiong to plaza sing then over to safra and home... didn't get to watch wimbledon... so sad.. i wanted to watch wimbledon very badly... cuz i watched white chicks and dodgeball liao... haha... so damn funnny... one of the nicest movie ever... i laughed until stomache... haha... well... ivan is letting me listen to some somg now... but i'm not really listening cuz i'm busy blogging... but it sounds very rocky... erm..i mean its rock... i think... wadever... well... took two sets of neoprints today.. one with yenxi.. which turned out really bad.. cuz we had no time to design it and oso cuz we didn't know what to pose and stuff... the second one.. we took it on the sofa thingy neoprint machine... so cool... took it with yenxi and lai qiang...

darius said that someone is lying to me... is it you???
hiaz... not in the mood to blog liao... to be continued...

2004-10-14T18:47:00.000+08:00

i'm a happy little pinkalily... hahaha... its been a good time ever since the exams ended... i'm so relax and composed... just got back all my results... quite good for a girl that did not really study... haha... feel so happy... must be cuz i do listen in class... haha... well... chantel and andrea was like cursing me for doing soo well even though i did not study... haha... this are my results...

Eng: 54.5
Chinese:63 (this got pulled up by my chinese compo...which was also best in the level.. hehe...)
Maths: 50
Geo:51.5
History: 57
Lit:57.3
Science: 31.5 (which is supposingly my best sub... :'(

aiyo... quite good liao hor??? i think so too... haha... tot i was going to retain... i was going to ask my mum to get ready to get me a place in outram... haha... i want to transfer school!!! i want to get to double sciences... bio and chem... but its soo hard with all the competition from the smarter pants... die die... so i rather transfer to some other sch where it is easier to get into double science... hiaz... but my mum says that it is good enough to get into single science... just get into bio can liao... cuz my sis says that there is a demand for bio-med ppl now...dunno la... i still wan to get into bio-chem... hiaz.... but seems like got no chance liao la... if my frens are gonna retain... i think i wan to retain too... so as to do well... and get into double science... see first lor...

well... 11th october... nice day... its the day of a new beginning... haha.... i'm crapping... i wonder why so many ppl know abt me bf... weird... i didn't write it la... only now la.. weird... well... its a very special day between me and my darling... eeee... why call until like tt... weird... haha... its weird being a non-single... haha.... now there is only melissa left... melissa jia you!!! haha... well... nicholas is a nice guy... you toked to him till 1pm last night leh... then today keep complaining that you are very tired... haha... oh... i luv sammie's ring... just that it lacks originality and the design is not very nice... but i think it is very sweet of them to buy each other rings... but the thing is that... leon should pay for both... why did you pay for his... and oh ya... leon... your fingers are so damn big... hahaha... well... luv is in the air... and it smells so sweet...

Messages:

Sammie e ah lian: haha... this hot red matches you... haha... luv you to bits but hope you do not get retain... if you do.. i'll try to get retained with you... so dun worry...

Melissa e ah girl: haha... this is supposingly ur fav colour... or at least the colour of your bag... luv you too... haha....

Melissa e jelly girl: haha... this is the colour of ur jelly... haha...

Chantel e laughing gal: this is the colour of ur *ahem* hahahaha...

2PR rawks our sc socks: this is to my fav 2PR.. you all rawk... we may not be very united and stuff...but i still think ur the best class... aft we said "thank you miss low" during the maths paper... i luv you all... rawk on!!!

sad stuff...

2004-10-10T14:50:00.000+08:00

ahhhhhhhhh... finally... i can blog on my blogspot again... wat the hell... it took soo long to recover... hiaz... now i'm soo free... i think i can blog everyday... but i have to go do cip 2mlw and maybe on tuesday too... so i may not be that free... i know i know... it ends at 12... so why can't i blog rite? cuz... if you know me very well... i wun go home aft that... i will sure go out... and come back really really late.... haha... and by the time i am back... i'm too exhausted to blog... and i'll just lie on my bed and hug my darling baby to sleep... haha... soo many things have happened... example.. i have not been studying for my final exams... and i'm soo gonna fail... die die... well... i'll just retain lor... i'm not worried abt that... just that i'm afraid that i will be the only one who retains and that i have to be in the same class as phua xin yan... ewwww... that disgusting freak... everyone hates her... ewww... dunno why i used to be her best fren... ewwwww... gross... *pukepuke* hiaz... and the worst is to get pushed up into single science... hiaz... then my whole life is gone... so i rather retain... and try my best to get into double science next year...ya... good idea... hiaz... i also dunno why i didn't not have the mood to study this year... i totally slacked la... so shit-to-fied... i totally did not study la... die die... dunno what to do now... my parents are soo disappointed in me... many ppl are... cuz i'm smart.. i can do very well for my studies... just that i dun put an effort to it... chum chum... hiaz... but there is nth i can do now... just wait for the results then maybe go jump down aft that... maybe i should jump in sch... so that the teachers will get soo freaked out when they see me in the corridors... haha... then i'll go be the 2pr ghost... haha... so cool...

another thing is that i just somehow quarreled with this guy last nite... okok... i always quarrel with ppl.... so whats soo special abt this? what soo special... is... that its not my fault this time... haha... lame... actually... i dun really know what is happening la... just that he got angry with me cuz i'm suppose to stay at gome and wait for his call... and cuz that he asked me out... but i said that i did not wan to go out with him... but i still went out... hiaz... what does he think i am? his wife? why must i stay at home and wait for his call? well... at least i called him when he msged me to say that he was looking for me... hiaz... and i didn't go out with him... cuz my parents do not like him... they think that he is those gangster type of ppl... he is la... but he has a very soft heart... watch "the terminal" also can cry sia... when i was like laughing and sleeping my head off... haha... well... i dunno la... he thinks that my mum likes him... cuz my mum said that he was one of the most presentable guy i ever brought home... but my dad does not like him... and even chased him out of my house the second time he came over to my house... so it kind of influenced my mum to not like him... hiaz... i know that he likes me... but what can i do? my parents do not like him... and that... he also knows that i like another guy... everyone knows who i like... i dun hide it so as to flirt or wat... hiaz... i dunno la... now he is upset and angry... and poor andy... he kept covering up for me... i told him not to cover up for me... but he kept telling pathom say that is he ask me out one... hiaz... andy... its not ur fault la... relax... dun drag urself into this situation... you will just make it more complicated... hiaz... i dunno what to do know.... i'll just have to take a step at a time....

what else? hiaz... i dun think there is anything else... other that i'm growing really fat too... haha... i think i'm jinxed... i brought so much misery and unhappiness into ppl's life.. i really dun deserve to live anymore... so that those ppl that i have affected can be more happy...

Pinkalily is back

2004-09-29T17:48:00.000+08:00

hey ppl... pinkalily is back... wheeeee... aft soo long... i'm finally blogging... even though i am very free... i'm too lazy to blog... and my exams are coming... ahhhhhhh... have not even studied finish yet... i think i am goin to retain liao... die die... stupid me can't even remember a word from my history text... ahhhhhhhh... wat am i to do... suppose to come home... go and bath... study awhile... then sleep... then wake up and study again... but i'm blogging... so shit-to-fied... haha... i'm just bored... and that also cuz no one is tagging my board... make my life soo boring... *YaWnZ* wat to do... everyone is too busy to actually come and tag my board... anyway... i've made alot of enemies in sch... like blah and blah... dun wan to mention their names in case its not true... haha... i'm dumb... but i've been acting stupid... and acting blah the blah... and i'm getting on ppl's nerves... haha...
i miss you soo much... i wonder how you and slumbers are getting along... really wish to know you better... and tok to you... but... there is this stupid weird force pulling us away... wat is it? maybe its darius... maybe becuz i'm so shy towards you... i dunno... as my msn nick has said... i dun wanna luv you and not get any luv in return anymore... i'm heading my way... i'm goin for ppl who luv me... and dun wait for me to luv them back... something like unconditional luv... thats wat i need... thats wat i want... and thats wat you can't give me... hiaz... i'm afraid you will get upset if i go off with another guy... which i may la... but my heart will always be with you... thats why i aren't in a relationship yet.... cuz i dun wanna cheat on the other guy... hiaz... really dunno wat to do... can you tell me wat am i to do? or else i shall just go with my heart... which is the way that you would not wan it to go... hiaz... i dunno... dunno... dunno...
i think i will stop here for now... really tired now... really wan to go and rest... goodnight.. buai...

2004-09-18T13:54:00.000+08:00

haha... finally it is another weekend... and i can sleep much longer liao... soo damn tired and stress from school... and haven't been blogging for such a long time... do you ppl miss me?? haha... well... i'm damn bored now... nobody to tok to... but i'm gonna to blog first then go study... which is supposed to be my main piority now... haha... but i'm not studying... as usual... so bad rite? i feel like hitting myself cuz nobody hits me for being bad... haha... so i have to do it myself... well... never mind... my gastric pains are doing it for me... and they really do *0uCh* hurt... i think i need to go to see the doctor very soon for some painkillers... or i will die of pain.. can't sleep... can't eat... can't go to sch... oh ya... that will be a very good reason for me to not go to sch... haha... but i have a science test on monday... and a chinese test on tuesday... so maybe i will use it on wens or thurs... nonono.. i have drama on thurs and they are going to start auditioning for the minor roles... i wanted to be rachel... but i didn't go for the last drama lesson... so i didn't sign up... and i also didn't go and take the script cuz i was doing my shu xing... haha... well... there goes my chance... but even if i did audition for the character... there was so many other girls that were soo good... they cried and acted soo well... i was soo amazed... well... so there are ppl out there who are better than me... me and samantha could remember the whole script for rachel's part and we were reciting it when the ppl were auditioning... ms chua and ms see did not look very happy and kept staring at us... sheesh... so smc+baker are going to audition for the four frens... even thou one of the frens would be rachel which means someone not from our grp... but we will still try our best... we will do it... then we are going to listen to melissa lynn's chanting as usual... sammie's reading without expression... melissa lee's "best" and me... the best... haha... i'm so ego... well... i'm not the best when compared to the rest of the drama girls... especially our seniors.... we can't even be compared to some of our juniors... damn it... well... i think as long as we try our best... and do what we think is the best... we still can make it... yes we will!
i was just called a flirt by someone a few days ago... i was soo upset... he told me that right in the face leh.... cuz i asked him why didn't he asked me to go orchard library to study too... and he told me:"Ask you for wat? so that you can go and flirt?" i was soo angry... that i stomped off into my room.. and never came out untill he left... we do you call me a flirt when you flirt too... i'm so upset now... fine... i'm a flirt... give me some examples to prove that i am... maybe is the way i tok... maybe is the way i behave... tell me... so that i wun do it again... maybe sometimes i'm a bit touchy and crappy... but is that flirt? i'm just trying to be friendly... and i end up being called a flirt... now my reputation in outram sec is in a mess... even royston hates me now... everyone thinks that i am a flirt.. a bimbo... a slut... a betrayer... but am i? i dunno... maybe cuz of somethings in the past that made you feel that i'm such a bitch but can you just stop and take a look at me now? maybe i am not that bad... and if you think i am even worst now... then its ok... but if you wanna just suddenly stop toking to me cuz you found out abt my past and stuff... and you please tell me why you hate me so much instead of keeping me in the dark... thanxs ppl... but please try not to hate me... let me show you the better side if me before you make a decision...
~*[its not good to hate a person]~*
~*[unless you have a very good reason]*~

i'm lost (3rd entry to my diaryland)

2004-09-14T21:00:00.000+08:00

ahhhhh... i feel so betrayed today... darius was at my house today... to collect the letter that min ru wanted me to pass to him... finally could get close to him and have a one on one chat... but we didn't really tok much... just left him alone to write his reply to min ru's letter... later on... i have a new fren... his name is_____... i cannot say... cuz i dun wan darius and the others to go look for him and do the same thing they did to ivan... the ____ told me that darius was toking bad abt me... and even andy joined in too... darius... toking bad abt me is like the third time i heard it... but andy... never tot that he would tok bad abt me... i feel so sad and cheated... i tot he liked me... i tot he liked me as much as i like him... and he would help me if someone was to tok bad abt me... but he didn't.... he joined in too... ahhhhh.... my classmates know that i like andy... they always say that he is soo hooligan and stuff... sometimes i will tok bck... sometimes i will just keep quiet and pretend that i didn't hear it... i would never join to to tok bad stuff abt andy... i'm kinda protective abt him... well... it seems like all that he said to me... like he misses me and that he feels the same way abt me is all fake... he is just lying to me... i feel so hurt... i wanna cry... but my sis is making me laugh... haha... well.. i'll never trust anyone liao... i got bluffed soo many times... i feel so confused on who to trust and who is not to be trusted... who really loves me? who??? i think the only one i can trust know is some of my friends and my parents... yeah...

i'm not going for the drama concert thingy cuz it is like 40 dollar plus and my "good" frens think that i can't afford it... so they didn't ask the teacher to get a ticket for me... hiaz... teacher told them that we need to see at least 2 plays in a year... but i haven't even went for one... except for those acs thingy that my "good" frens drag me to... and now i owe sammie 60 dollars for the tickets... i'm never ever going for any stupid barker or wadever thing with you all already... anyway... now you have leon... you can go with him.... i dun give a damn... i'm in a really bad mood today... just like____...

a broken dream(2nd entry of diaryland)

2004-09-13T22:08:00.000+08:00

hiaz... today was the first day of school... having monday blues... actually i have school blues everyday... haha... then kept hugging my baby suying cuz she is soo plump and cute and i missed her soo much over the hoildays... i also missed andrea very very much... and sammie... and chantel... and my teachers... very long never hear them nag liao... suddenly they sound soo refreshing... well.. today i stayed back during recess to finish up my chinese project with andrea and some extra ppl who just sat ard and do their own stuff... samantha and melissa were in chargee to buy food and complete the second part of the paper... chantel was to type... but andrea and me did most of the work... melissa just dictated will her so called "good chinese"... she did one part and flew off to shumei... samantha just helped to write a few words and eat... haha... well... andrea just called me to say that chantel does not have hansvision and she can't type it out... so we have to do it during recess again.. and as usual... chantel will go for recess with kelly... and melissa will go to shumei... samantha will just day dream and sms away... "wheee"... we had a "how to study for your exams thingy" during project work lesson... kinda weird la... cuz they are toking abt stuff that we already know... like doing mind maps and stuff... we learned that long long time ago lor... but they dunno... so they just blabbered on... then during assembly... ms heng toked abt being gracious and blah blah... things that i dun think i need to learn... cuz almost everyone knows that but just that they dun do it...

aft sch... ate with amanda and sammie and jolynn and stef(our new class prefect!!! woohooo i love her!!!)... then we went to the library to borrow and return some books... i gave up in that really thick book... and i borrowed this simpler version of a thick book... its called "a child called"it""... sammie has read it before... can you believe it? sammie actually reads... wow... i'm soo happy for her... haha... well... then all of us did some funny stuff... which i cannot tok abt in case we get into trouble... haha... then we played basketball... we gossiped... haha... was fun.. then audrey joined us and we went off to take 960 to bugis... met darius and ivan there to give darius the letter that min ru asked me to pass to him... haha.. he had such a hard time trying to write with the wall as a table... so i decided to go with them to orchard library to study... i didn't really study la... just sit there... let brandon take candi camera pics of me... -_-" but i put my noted from the right side to the left side( i'm toking abt lit.. if you dun understand... too bad la... =P)

then i wrote my chinese du hou gan on a nice piece of gao zhi... then i dunno how to write alot of words... so they keep complaining that i came from scgs but i dunno how to write chinese... actually they also dunno how to write mah... hiaz.. chao ta damn big mouth la... kai kou bi kou dou zai suan wo... haha... but who cares... then i went to ransack brandon's phone... wah lao.. still got porn folder... then me and darius were looking at it... until darius really cannot ta han liao... then we closed it... haha... wah lao... brandon is such a hornified ass... soo many porn la... it occupies like most of the megabites... haha... well... then we went home... ivan and darius were supposed to send me home... but i dunno why they did not get out when i got out... humph! then i wanted to top up my ez link card... but they stpid thingy dun wanna accept the ten dollar note... i was soo pissed... alamak...

oh ya... now to the broken dream... soo sad... i was at wisma atria's fish tank thingy while waiting for the guys to go to the toilet... i was admiring the fishes and stuff... suddenly this two man looking at the fishes said that the planty thingy look soo damn fake... and he even thinks that it is made of styrofoam... my heart dropped... those plant thingys are STYROFOAM!!! ahhhhh... ever since i was a small kid... and i passed by that beautiful fish tank... i always thoughted that evrything was real.. and i always admired it alot... and i will always stnd there till i really really have to go... i really loved that fish tank alot... but when i heard that the plant thingys were fake... i felt soo sad... like i was tricked my whole life that i was actually soo close to real life sea creatures... i felt soo soo sad... i was totally stunned... omg... that stupid thing is fake... ahhhhh!!! but then i told myself... at least those beautiful fishes swimming ard were not fake...

i've changed my place!! its http://pinkalily.diaryland.com.. go now...

2004-09-11T15:26:00.000+08:00

1st entry of my diaryland

2004-09-11T15:13:00.000+08:00

i'm gonna start blogging on my new temporary diaryland now... since i can't blog in blogspot... and i'll just copy and paste it later on... haha... well... alot of things have been happening... i'm kinda dizzy now... just quarreled with darius... my gor gor... dunno for what reason.. i can't remember it too... just that we just can't stand each other's attitude... both our attitudes suck like hell... haha... everytime we start toking... we end it with a quarrel over some trivia matter... so shit-to-fied... well... i think thats why we are not together till this time... actually.. we never really quarreled this badly... but just that both of us are tired of each of our bloody attitudes so we just gave up on each other... hiaz... really dunno what to do... shall i patch up with him? but i already apologized to him already... its either cuz he doesn't know whether he wants to patch up... in case we quarrel again... or he does not want to... i dunno... its all up to him now...

recently... i started missing one of my guy frens that used to like me... i sudddenly remembered all the times we had together and how happy we were... he gave me this bear... i gave him a bookmark and card... i still have the bear... i wonder if he still has the card and bookmark... i dun think so... i think he has fogotten abt me... hiaz... its been such a long time.. i'm sure he has... nvm... i dun really miss him as badly as i did a few nights ago.. but the times we had together... was one of my most memorable days... i miss those days... even though we did not really tok to each other.. it was just the type of silent happiness... oh... makes me wanna cry when i think abt it... haha... whatever... just that i can't remember any other guy that made me feel so special... hiaz.. but now... he has turned very bad... not only defiant.. he doesn't study anymore... learned to smoke... played games until the next morning... he is a really naughty boy now... i wanna guide him back... but when i sms him... he doesn't reply... i dun wanna call him... i'm afraid he will just "kup" the phone... i dunno what to do... i also heard that he has a gf liao.. think it was the girl behide him the other day.... slim... and looks quite ok.. hiaz... anyone who is slim is better than me la... think he has found his true happiness liao... true happiness cannot be found on me... thats why he went on with his life... i hope the others can do so too...

today... there is drama... but i tot today was friday... hahaha... stupid me... i even had miss "c" call me up to tell me that i had to go for drama... wahaha... well.. i didn't go for the other lesson too... cuz i had gastric pains... i've got a letter... but i think i need an mc... hiaz... who cares... i dun care... hahaha... when miss "c" called me... i could hear the drama girls in the background doing the "ommmmm" thingy... so funny... meditating early in the morning... haha... we used to do that during pe.. haha... miss school... but i haven't done any of my hw... so i dun wanna go to sch... anyway... when sch starts... exams will start too... :'( dun wanna have exams... i have been slacking alot... can't get myself back to studying... going to fail really badly this year... i'm gonna be the only retainee this year... maybe not... maybe they will just expell me for being soo dumb... ya... they could just do that... anyway i dun wanna stay in sc... stressful... but i'll miss all my frens... hiaz... i've got a bad reputation in sch... for talking back to teachers... or maybe only miss seah and miss dong... for being very very forgetful... and being part of the bimbo gang... many ppl say that we acbc... act chio bui chio... but please la... those ppl who always complain abt us... are not say very pretty also... and they keep saying that we take up the whole toilet... plzzz... we are always just in one corner... and nowadays we dun really go anymore... cuz got this naggy ah ma here... always breathing down their necks... but sometimes cannot stand them for being so slow... i'll just go off myself... haha... but no matter how bimbotic you are... or how many ppl tell me to stop hanging out with you alll... i'll still love you all and still be a pain in the neck fren... haha...

i can't blog... shit-to-fied!!! all i can do is type this... muhaha... or shall i just blog with my title? i dunno la... there is smth wrg with bloggy

2004-09-07T23:06:00.000+08:00

i've hurt someone...

2004-08-25T17:15:00.000+08:00

i've hurt someone again... maybe not someone... but many many ppl... i'm some dumb ass la... should just float away.... or just drown.. which will be soo much better... ok... i know its the way i wrongly express whatever i want to say... lets get an example... hmmm... like... "hey sam! look at our class quilt! soo puffy! like your eye bags! hahahaha!" see it? ok... it seems like an total insult... but i was just joking... and sammie... who knows me soo damn well... knows that too... so she doesn't blame me for that... but some ppl just dun get and can't take jokes... ok... sometimes its not a joke... its real... comes from my heart... didn't know it would hurt you... and just blurted that stupid phrase out... see? next time i should just keep my mouth shut and keep everything to myself... good idea rite? but i can't do it... i need to tok... if i dun crap and tok like how i do know... i will not be me... rite? yes... well... i really hope there is some way out of this deep deep well... hope i can find a rope and get out of it asap...

hurting someone... a person... a very nice person... is a very very bad and evil thing to do... but i wan you to hate me... so i just have to do that to get you to hate me... hope it is working really well...

*~[LoViN YoU MiSsIn YoU]~*

hahahahohohohehehe

2004-08-24T15:08:00.000+08:00

hiaz... dunno what to blog abt today... maybe some bad news first... haha... well... got many tests back today... i got my lit back... oh shit... i scored 10/25... omg... i should have studied la... the other time... i TRIED to study... i had 14/25... and i just suddenly dropped like that... omg... i better study really hard... especially when i want my mum to get a new hp... WITH a plan... haha... then we got our... let me see... oh... history... hiaz... got 10/20 for this stupid test which i dun even remember doing it... omg... i'm like soo damn dumb... better study hard liao... yaya... i knew that i had to study hard long long long long long long long long long long long long long long time ago... but i just want my hp... my lastest... hiaz... dunno what you call it... had chinese ting xie... didn't study... gonna fail again... haha... and why didn't i study... cuz i was sleeping the whole day... haha.. what a pig... well... i was really tired... you couldn't really blame me for that... haha... i didn't even eat dinner... and was suffering from gastric the whole morning... luckily... i had my famous amos cookie... so nice... haha...

we were gossiping as usual... the whole day... nth to do mah... and there isn't anything exciting happening nowadays... except for the usual free radio... haha.. AMANDA!!! haha... sorry to call you that... but its a compliment that your singing is great... you have got to join s'pore idol... i'll vote for you... woohoo!!! haha... and the usual vandalising of chantel's table... haha... i went to write 'jialat" on her table... haha... okok... its not usual... i usually dun vandalise things... unless i really need to... well... i'll try to get a picture of it... haha... must go borrow digital cam liao... and also learn how to get the photo into the com and into the blog spot thingy... haha... amanda has this really cool book... by... by... erm... someone... its called" someone elses" or was it "someone else's child"???? i'm not sure... but its a really cool book... i'm gonna get it... and read it... haha... i'll try la...

nth else to say... nobody ask me to write a message to them... so there are no messages for the day... may God bless everyone on earth!!!

i'm soo tired... as usual...

2004-08-23T18:27:00.000+08:00

aww... today i almost didn't go to school... i was so tired... had gastric pains... and there was this pain on my right eyelid... hiaz... but in the end... i decided to go... and it wasn't that bad... the first lesson was maths... and the teacher taught me a whole lot of crap that was diff from what my tuition teacher taught me... so who shall i believe... who shall i follow? i didn't bring my maths worksheet even though i did it... wah lao... its the first time in a long long time that i did my homework... and... and... i didn't bring it... so damn shity-fied... hiaz... and we had to stay back to do it all over again for her... but i didn't stay back... muhahaha... there is gonna be a geo test on wenesday... and i'm suppose to start studying now... but i'm blogging... cuz many ppl are very bored... and need my blog to satisfy them for the moment... and if i dun blog... i will get lots of complains... haha...

Andrea just sent me this really sweet email... if your my fren.. or i treat you like my fren.. you should have recieved it... but yude and lynette and cheryl.. i couldn't send it to you all cuz you have all gone over your storage limit... muhaha... so you better go and check your mail box... haha... me and andrea have decided to make a website on us for our computer studies project... haha... we have decided on the theme of jelly beans with a star in the middle and abit of a black and white theme... and we will link lin junjie's fan club website to out site.. cuz andrea luvs him like hell.. haha... so funny la... well... today... we had assembly... and miss heng toked and toked and toked... and i was falling and falling and falling aslp... *YaWnZ* she was telling us abt the school's vision and blah and blah... which she had already told us like a thousand times... but we still dun remember... muhahaha... then aft that me.. amanda and samamtha... were learning abt the male anatomy and some gross stuff.. sammie is soo innocent... haha... but she is not anymore... i jus polluted her mind... haha... not only me la... amanda also... haha... then aft that... we went shopping at bugis for presents... hahaha... we bought green apple blended ice... eww... it had particles of apple skin in it.. what the hell... and the bubbles are not as nice as it used to be... aww... i know what to buy already... all i have to do know... is to save enough money and to pray that they will like their presents... haha...

i'm missing ya soo much... i know you think i'm a flirt and stuff... i think i am too... i know your angry with us... but can we just take it as it never happened? plzzz... i really want to forget abt our relationship... cuz it hurts me soo much when i'm soo near you... yet so far... i feel so happy when you tok to me... but i'm angry when you passed up a blank paper... *HuMpH* your soo naughty... sometimes i think that maybe ppl are just lying to me that they like me... cuz they dun show it... and its also my fault la... i oso dun show it... but plzz la... your a guy... haha... i'm being soo lame... hiaz... i just hope your by my side now... to tata me to sleep.. and hug me when i'm so upset... so tired... so stressed... i hope that your always here... and i'm always there for you... tell me if you still luv me... you dun have to always tell me... just sometimes... when i'm insecure abt our relationship... or just a hug or a nice little sayang on the head... it means alot to me... haha... i'm being lame...

sammie... i know you have alot of burdens... me also... you can tell me every single thingy... when i'm free of course... haha.. book appointment first... wahaha...

melissa lynn... i still dun trust jh.... be more careful... you never know if he is two timing or something...

melissa lee... aiyo... i know your pimple case is very bad... but you got to fight on with it... put more cream... i'll always be here to give you moral support

daddy peh... got nth to say to you sia... everynite tok to you until got nth to say liao... dry out liao... muhahaha...

everyone else... erm... i dunno what to say to the rest of you... tag on my board for a free message from me... haha... but of course you must indicate that you wan a message not... ok?

*~[LoViN yOu MiSsIn YoU]~*

i'm so sad and tired...

2004-08-22T13:11:00.000+08:00

hiaz... woke up early in the morning to get ivan... darius... and andy... to school for their maths prelim examination... it was a really important exam...and guess what... darius and andy didn't study... ok... thats not the worst part... andy... passed up a blank paper... nonono... the paper had qns and his name of course... i'm soo disappointed with this two ppl... hiaz... i really dunno what to do abt them... well.. at least ivan studied... so guai... haha... well... then i walked with them up the hill... then down again... but i walked down myself... and so shit... their exam only started at 10... like two hours aft their reporting time... shit... we could have toked longer... studied longer... why didn't the teacher inform them abt the change in time??? aiyo... then oh ya... i met petrina while waiting for andy at the bustop... haha... then she was like..." are you going to school?" then i told her that i was going somewhere else before going to school... haha... and when i reached school.. it was still very early... but many ppl were there already...

at the open house... omg... we had a script to memorise... but it got easier to remember aft we said it so many times... haha... then there was many ppl.. had to tok and tok... shout and shout... scold and scold... haha... anyway... i took an hour break at walfertown instead of 20 mins... haha... didn't really get scolded... thank goodness... well... then came back and started working again... haha... the crowd was gwtting lesser and lesser... soon we were just killing insects... haha...darius... andy.. raymond.. their friend and brandon... omg... i didn't know brandon was coming... and i was soo shocked that i screamed "omg" very loudly and everyone from the drama room rushed out to see wat was happening... they asked me if that was my bf... eww... haha... well.. then i had minru tour them around while i was on duty... blowing bubbles... being tbbs... shouting for ppl to catch the drama performance... being at the drama booth to entertain ppl... toked to andy for 1min... then walk with them for awhile... like altogether 15mins... then keep rushing back to duty... apricot leong... kept taking breaks... i feel like really breaking her... hiaz... then the sammie and melissa... wah lao... shopping spree sia... then keep buying food to eat... haha... melissa lynn... aiyo... tok to ppl with her mouth full... haha... then so disgusting... hahaha... then andy angry liao... die sia... then i rush all of them away... then they went to play pool... haha... actually they wanted to wait for me... but i rushed them off cuz later andy angry la.. then minru was like..."how do you know he is angry? he looked like that ever since he came.." then i just told her that i know la... then idiotically... haha... what word is that? well.. i was let off 5 mins aft they left... so they could have just waited for me... hiaz.. i'm such a dumbo... haha... nvm... later on i went to cini to meet them and watch them play pool... haha... i bought alot of things at my class stall... haha... not alot la... i bought the book and the bookmark... then i bought a soft toy with little beads inside from another stall... haha... our class stall wasn't doing as well as i though it would... hiaz... so upset...

well... many things happened when we were playing pool at cini... hui yi... jolean( i dunno how to spell), wendy and nevil joined us for pool and then i met lynette from my class there too... saw her bf... hiaz... rachel wants me to tell her that her bf is very flirt and blah blah... but i dun think he is that bad la... he seems to care for lynette alot... haha... later we all left nevil, wendy and andy and went home... sad sad mood... cuz of something... dun tell you... =P

a heartwarming day...

2004-08-20T20:03:00.000+08:00

aww... today was soo soo cool... even though i was really tired and full of dust... if was terribly fun.. wheee!!! we were let of at 12:00 to go get ready for the open house... and the hard work begins... we had to get the drama room set up for 2mlw's open house... the room was soo dusty... *CoUgH cOuGH* then we had to clean up the dust... plan where to put the props... decide what props to display and what not to display... had to find ways of getting ppl to not anyhow touch the props... as they cost abt a hundred over... but to tell the truth... it really does not seem that expensive... but i guess it should be since they dun even throw those dusty stuff away... haha... then melissa... made herself offically know as... APRICOT LEONG!!! muahaha... so cool... shall call her that from now onwards... haha... even kai chi calles her apricot... haha... melissa wrote alot of "plz do not touch" for us to paste around... and we ended up seeing more of those "plz do not touch" stickers than props... hiaz... i really dunno what to say to the ppl 2mlw... have to talk abt the history of the drama... and all the achievements... weee... haha... well... i'll try my best to remember my lines la... haha... and try to come up with some crap if i dunno what to say... but anyway... kai chi will be there to help us... but i think that apricot leong will be running away to the tennis court again...oh.. kai chi is going too... so i guess me and jasmine will have to try hard... oh... jasmine... she is my new friend.. she is such a nice girl... she is in sec one... SY!!! soo smart... her PSLE score was 260... omg! can yuo imagine that? she is soo damn smart... haha... well... most of the drama juniors all come from sy... all soo smart... i feel so ashamed... hahaha...

aft cleaning up and locking up the doors... i went to the canteen to check out my classes stall... it was soo cool... the things they sold were so nice... i'm sure it will be sold out in a few hours... i think they will need to stock up alot... i "chope" a little girl with an umbrella bookmark... drawn by one of our seniors... it is soo cute... i luv it... and its only a dollar... and i bought a notebook... and chosed the pink one... and with a little girl that looks like me.. muhaha... so funny... then i bought a candle from this sec one stall... it smells like jelly.. so cool... i also met suying and ate lunch with her... haha... i miss her soo much... then she was toking to her friend... and i toked to her fren... make her happy... haha... but i think it was her friend that made her happy most of the time... she had such a fun time insulting her friend lor... hahaha... i feel so bad helping her insult her friend.... especially when i dun even know the person... haha...

there was this really big storm in school today... and melissa lynn's skirt flew up... haha... so funny... well.. then when its soo dark... and its lightly drizzling... the air was cool and you could feel the wind in your hair... omg... it was soo cool.. and when you walk in to the canteen... there was still some ppl there... not like the usual sparse ppl... haha.. what am i saying??? well... it was soo heart warming... hiaz... dunno how to explain... maybe you should ask amanda... she has gotten the jolynn laughing diesease.. muahaha... and i've gotten some of it too... but not as bad as amanda... haha... she felt so touched when i held the umbrella for her when we were walking to the bustop... haha... today was soo fun... i wish it would happen again... hope it will start raining around the end of the open house thingy... so that i can feel it again... =)

suckers!!!

2004-08-19T19:10:00.000+08:00

i totally hate my life... today so many things happened... i dunno what to do... it totally sucked la... everything is not going my way...

had my history test today... aiya... i just copied and paste everything from my textbook since its a open book test... so i just copied,copied, paste, paste... so stupid.. like whats the point of having a test when you can actually refer to the textbook??? but i can actually remember what i copied... ok... so the test works... but i may just forget abt it... or maybe... right aft i finishing blogging... haha...

did my napfa.. again... what the hell... did my five items... passed all... cool rite?haha... well... me and jocelyn were waiting for mrs lee... and we started dancing and acting spastic... haha... she was pretending to hit me... and i was pretending to "fly away".. haha... and we were dancing... haha... little did we know that the whole class was looking at us... omg... they were laughing at us... haha... so lame... i wonder what was so funny.. haha... i thought it was funny too.. haha... well... i'll just be more careful next time... haha... sammie was my partner... and she kept running off to melissa lynn and she wasn't even concerntrating on our dance... i think she was staring at the melissasssssss... wadever... she is always like that... and she told me that she likes melissa lynn more... not that i'm les or wat... just that we are not as close as we were last time... she is kinda starting to hate me... :(... we were doing the YMCA thingy... me and jocelyn made it into..."why do gorillas and chimpanzees come from india?" haha... so funny... dunno how to explain the action la... ask jocelyn to demostrate it to you la... haha...

today... during music.. we sang songs from some musicals... the songs were very nice... i like one of them alot alot... but i forgot the title... nvm... i'll bring it home 2 mlw and type it in here... woohoo!!! so hows my bloggy song? chantel.... have you heard it? haha... i'm sure you have... ain't the lyrics and music nice... awwwwwwwwwww... i'm so touched... cry cry... boohoohoo...

today during drama... we were assigned to do different things because my make-up group has been suspended cuz of some stupid reason... i dun know la... well... then we were all supposed to do the board... but then we had to spilt ourselves up... i heard that they wanted trubidores(haha... i dunno how to spell la... just use... tbb...) and i immediately raised up my hand... then sammie asked what was it abt... and she decided to go too... well... then melissa lynn wanted to go too... but only two ppl can go... so we were discussing... hiaz... i dun understand why you have to hide from them... i dun even think that they will come... and even if they come... ur costumes wun cover up that much... the way ur butt shakes will be enough for bryan to find you... well... i wanted to be a tbb really badly... i wanted to do it last year.. but they had enough ppl... so i couldn't do... i was soo upset... well... so i have a chance this year... but who took it? sammie and melissa lynn... why? just because you all wanted to hide from bryan and so you all can let down your hair and put on makeup... its not fair to me... not fair!!! i wanted to be a tbb so badly... and sammie... you obviously wanted melissa to be with you... you did not even help me... and you kept helping her... i wanted to cry really badly... i was soo upset... oh shit... i'm starting to cry already... omg... you all just dun get it... you like melissa soo much that you dun even bother abt me anymore... everything is her... she is everything... i seem so invisible... i hate it... i soo hate it... why is this happening? we used to be such good frens... we used to tell each other everything... the melissa used to be our so called enemy... what happened? what happened? i really dunno... i feel so left out... so... so... i can't describe it... i mean its like... jocelyn... i'm sure if jocelyn was there... even though she has to give up her place to let me be a tbb... she would let me go... she wun be soo selfish as to keep it all to herself just because she wants to hide from ppl... i dun get you... i dun understand... omg... why is everything changing... i dun think i wanna be in smc+baker anymore... you all can just be smm... or sm2... i dunno... well... i can't stand the pressure anymore... i feel so pressurized... we are always late for class... always going to the toilet... always breaking school rules... toking abt guys... i can't stand it... your pretty and everything... i am not worth being ur fren... you all have guys to drool over you all... i dun have... anyway... you all went for the perankan night thingy... and i didn't have a chance to go... so can't you all just give me a chance to do it? just one chance... hiaz... there is not use toking abt it anymore... we can't change it... well... since you like it this way... fine.. have it ur way... i know your used to having everything your way... so have it... you wanna hide then hide... you wanna show off then show off... i will be in the room with a FAN!!! and you all will be sweating outside... =P

i can't take my life... i hope i can faster get it over and done with... ASAP!!

what to say leh???

2004-08-18T21:26:00.000+08:00

haha... i'm having an outbreak... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... so sickening... melissa says that it must be the time of the month... but i dun think so leh... haha... dunno la... i rarely have outbreaks... unless it is the timeof the month la... haha... melissa should be right la... haha... its soo irritating lor... red red one... so ugly... i'm already ugly enough liao... still have an outbreak... hiaz... having a very bad hair day too... shit la... hiaz... dunno what to do la... just tie it up lor... cannot let it down liao... or ppl will start complaining liao..."aiyo! your hair so DRY!!!" ass them la... say ppl... say yourself... =P

still listening to jay chou songs... hiaz... still as nice as ever... promised to send alot of ppl the jay chou songs... but... maybe cuz i am very busy this few days... yaya... busy with school and sleeping as usual... haha... only online in the aftnoon... like half and hour or so then go and sleep liao... haha...

its the time of the year again... haha... its the ghost festival... ahhhhhhhhh... i'm so scared... wahaha... i always get so freaked out when i come home late... even when i bath... eww... i keep thinking that there is this girl in black standing behide me... haha... my imagination too wild liao... ahhhhhhhhh... thinking of it makes my hair stand... as i live in a HDB estate... you can see ppl burning incense paper and praying... every family has to do it... thats if your a buddist la... i'm a buddist... so i have to... but my mom did it already... was supposed to go with her the other day... but... haha.. was toking to my 'daddy'... haha... then we can't step on those paper or else we will offend the ghost... so we have to be very careful when we are walking... aiyo... why am i giving you a history lesson... muahaha

omg... valerie... your blog... so scary... abt the deformed babies... the pictures... ewwwwwwwwwwww... where did you get those from... so... hiaz... so poor thing la... not born... then like tt liao.. i soo sad.... lets have a minute of silence for them now..*a minute passes...* ok...

I've got alot of things to say... dun stop me!!!

2004-08-17T15:42:00.000+08:00

Muhaha... i've got alot alot of things to say... but i dunno where to start from... damn it... ok.. lets start from school... erm... first period... it was PE!!! damn it... had to do my napfa 2.4km run again... damn it... damn damn damn... ran like hell... everyone was cheering me on... ppl came up to push me to go on running... but being so emotionally-led... the more they pushed me... the more i didn't wan to ran... haha... in the end... i failed... muahaha... failed again... i got 19.?? secs... but my frens help me minus off two rounds... so i only ran like... 10 rounds? hiaz... i luv all of them so much... they helped me so so so much... luv ya all!! 2PR rocks!!! the rest... suck... hahaha... only now did i realise how many frens i had in class... even though some of them were scolding me behide my back for failing... but i have gotten over it... but i was crying like hell when i heard my frens complaining that they have tried to push me but i just refused to budge... omg... i hate them... i shall not mention names... cuz they should know who they are... actually... i think it was only one girl... haha... so its not tat bad... and my dearest dearest mrs leeeeeeeeee... omg... i luv her to bits... she made two deals with me... i think she obviously know that i didn't make it to the deal... but...she gave me another... its either i run the 2.4 again.. or she let me pass my 2.4 and let me do my five items again... and lazy me... will always choose the easy way out... i am goin to redo my five items again... woohoo!!!

lalala... see... all your fault... i forgot what i wanted to blog... shit... haha..

being a christian

2004-08-15T21:34:00.000+08:00

it ain't easy being a christian... theres alot of things you have to do... and can't do... and there is alot of things to learn... its really hard... and i'm trying... but i'm not really trying... wahaha... i'm dumb la.. lets try our best... try to get closer to God.. lets try...

cannot leh... how? try again la...

still cannot... well... lets try harder next time... think harder... breathe in... breathe out... hiaz...

yesterday... was my first service at the ELIM church... had a really fun time... the sermen was great... very interesting and dunno how to say la... just great la... then almost won the mini ipod.. but too bad la... this small little indian boy won it... i'm not being racist... i just wasn't lucky lor... nvm... luck will come my way soon... then had a free water bottle with "the edge" on it... the name of the youth service... so cool... haha... then me and my dear yude/ joseph... i still rather call you joseph... well... he was really upset aft the service... but i shall not tell you why... cuz i promised not to tell... i did rite? haha... he sent me to the doby ghaunt mrt station... and we saw his primary sch frens... haha... he was soo scared... hahaha... so funny... then he left me there... and i went to the newton hawker centre to look for my mummy... she just opened a chicken rice store there... and my dad has another shop there too... so cool rite? if you are hungry... just go there to look for them... woohooo!!! then my uncle send us back home...

i'm happy trying to be a christian... i'm still trying and forever be...

horrid dream...

2004-08-15T18:20:00.000+08:00

omg!!! i had this horrible dream... gross!!! puke puke!!! yuck!!! i dreamt i was kissing this horrible looking guy... eeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww!!! i'm not telling you who is it... its too gross!!! eww... i can't stand it... i hate that person to hell... eww... yuck! what a gross thing to dream abt... well... one of my best dream was when i dreamt of ma and my dear... haha... i'm not telling... haha... how i wish i could turn back time...

i'm still listening to jay chou songs... their soo damn nice... anyone wanna listen? just tell me... i'll send it to you via msn... their like soo sad but the music is so damn nice... he is like the coolest guy of the century... i wanna get two cds... the one with the hamburger... haha... i dunno what is it called... and the r and b one... both are damn cool... with the best music around... woohoo!! a must get...

just got the august issue of seventeens... abit slow rite? wahaha... well... it is very nice... all abt fashion and stuff... cool... then i know what to get for my imperfect body and tupid face... wahaha... and i shall go on abt how imperfect i am... well... i'm not exactly imperfect la... just dunno how to make myself more outstanding... still thinking of what hairstyle shall i can't to improve on my new hairstyle...it kinda sucks cuz i did not matain it very well... and my hair is super dry... need a new shampoo too... i'll go get one later... well.. then abt my face... sammie is always pickying on my nose... "you have soo many blackheads... looks like many little ants.." omg... i feel like killing her... haha... but i'm used to it... anyway... its not that i like it... just can't get rid of it... i'm just as disgusted abt my nose as you all are... so... STOP STARING AT MY NOSE!!!

next... its abt my body... what the hell... bryan says i'm fat... ask him go and die la... i know i'm fat la... just shut up... who doesn't know or think that i am fat... well.. at least i am not as fat as you... and i've got the curves... your just like a stupid tree truck! well... alot of ppl i know look like tree trucks... haha... but i shall not mention names... but if you know that you are... come to me... let me help you over this trucky issue... wahaha... i'm lame... well... lets get back to me... fat... you can hide fats... so i'll shall try to hide... wear shirts that cover my fat arms... and aren't tight... haha.. i always wear tight clothes... then my "daddy" will say: you look like ur two months pregnant.." what the hell again... its not that bad ok... if you say that again... i'll tell the whole world that you made me pregnant... muhahaha... but aren't i gonna land into alot of trouble by saying that? crap... i've got to find another way of revenging that stupid ass... wear high heels to make me look taller... wear skirts that are short... but not too short... so as not to expose the fat thighs... haha... so abt abit above the knees can liao... aiyo... why am i writing a review to let you all know how to dress up... shit... haha... nvm... shall share it with the whole world... but if it does not work out... do not blame me... hehe...

had my english oral yesterday... regina lee was my examiner... cool... she was my lit and cme and pe teacher last year...i did i should at least pass la... not tt bad rite? she asked me who do i wanna become... i said i wanted to become my mother... because she is very hard working and is working really hard to support us... i wanted to add on abt her illness... but i didn't... maybe if i did... she will be damn touched and give me extra marks... i'm soo evil... muahaha... then she askied me if i wanted to change any part of my body... i told her that i didn't want to change any part... and that i'm already quite happy with what i have... then she asked me that qn again... or something like tt.. then i told her that i wanted my conplexion to be better without all the pimples and stuff... haha...

i better make sure i dun tok to that person before i go to sleep again... or else i'll start dreaming abt it... yuck! anyway... he said that he was gonna dream abt oral... as in the disgusting kind of oral... sick guy... ask him go and die... dunno why he was soo h**ny last nite... gross... this teaches me and you a lesson... never tok to a h**ny guy... hahaha!!!

i'm damn fed up

2004-08-11T16:24:00.000+08:00

i'm damn fed up with this stupid bloggy thingy... wah lao... plzz lor... dunno what the hell happened to all my entires... all *vanish* into the thin air... aiyo... then everyone complaining... hiaz... then i oso very irritated plus lazy la... so i just changed it to a ready made one... haha... but i like the black one... :'(

i'm so in love with jay chou!!! he rocks man... his new album is soo damn nice... and he can rap soo damn fast... i'm like..." what did he just say?" haha... well... he is soo cute when he act cool... nonono... he doesn't even act cool... he is just abit... cool... haha... ya... well... and when he breaks into a very seldom smile of his... omg... can faint la... aiya... can't stand it... he is even cuter than my wang ren fu or is it wang ren bu? aiya... dunno leh... aiya... just missed wan quan yu le... got zhang shan wei and wang ren fu/bu... ahhhhhhhhhhhh... they are the best partners around... can crap until so funny man...

happened to go to kim wakerman's during com lesson just now... oh damn it... i think she got in for the channel i audition... i'm soo angry!!! sammie too... what has she got that we dun have? we went for the audition... but did she? i dun think so... didn't see her... i'm so damn angry... f***... oops... if anderson sees this... i'm dead... haha... but i censored it... should be alright rite? haha... well... kim wakerman sucks la... always think that she is the best... hiaz... sometimes i think she is very pretty... but she just pisses me off really badly... cuz she is damn arrogant... thinking that she is better than everyone else just cuz she is a mix... not fair... never mind... i'm a multi racial... i'm mix of indian, chinese, peranakan and... let me think... jap? haha... almost got jap blood... but... too bad... hahaha... nvm...

guess wat!!! i passed my maths... finally... 15/30... haha... ok la.. not that good... but i passed it for the first time... ever since... i think... last year... omg... i'm so damn happy... chantel is very happy for me too... yeah! then for chinese... haha... i got the highest for my kai tou zuo wen... haha.. 8/10... or is it 8 and a half? dunno la.. jsut highest in class can liao... soo cool... i was like crapping with andrea that i was writing crap and i surely wun get to be the top one la... but... omg... teacher called my name... woohoo!!! soo happy...

i'm really happy when i go to school... even though i get scolded by teacher and even got book by nat for long nails... crap... couldn't get pass her and idiot miss seah... wahaha... if i am not in school... i think too much... then cry too much... now my eyes still abit pain... school helps me numb the pain i have in my broken heart... cuz i study in school.. crap alot in school.. dun really think abt alot of stuff... then when come back home... i'm either online or sleeping... haha... so school is the best medicine for me... cutting myself? wanted to... but as usual... like everyone knows this... that i'm afraid... wahaha...

oops...

2004-07-31T12:07:00.000+08:00

oops... i deleted all my past entries... damn it... but i like the new layout... ain't it cool... okok... it is a bit squishy and cramped but you will soon get used to it... haha... now i have got to get a tagboard... again... and make more entries so that it will not look that plain... haha...

today... i am supposed to go for the st margs primary school funfair... but i am waiting for my sister... who is still sleeping... she ask me to let her sleep for another 5 mins... but i have been very busy trying to get a new layout... that i forgot to call her... nvm... who cares abt her... i've got legs... i can go there myself... but... oh crap... i dun even know where it is... now even my legs can't help me anymore... maybe i should just take a cab... nah... i'm saving up to buy a nice present for sammie... her b day is coming... HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAMMIE!!!

*i'm looking for love... i wonder where it has gone*

i wanna be a christian

2004-07-30T23:06:00.000+08:00

i wanna be a christian... accept jesus into my heart... build a relationship with HIM... ain't that cool? haha... well... went to the ELIM church today... was very fun... the performance was very interesting and gave a detailed explanation into eternity... haha... but not deep enough... they showed us how to get to heaven... by accepting and believing in god... today... yu de touched me... he totally knew how i was feeling and went for my weakness... hiaz... then i agreeded to go up and say the sinner's prayer... haha... i am saying it for the third time... and i'm gonna try sticking to it this time... of all the church i went... i think this church is the most not holy but at the same time holy... hiaz... dunno how to explain la... well... i ever went to city harvest church... heart of god church... and now.. Elim church... i may be goin for their youth service 2 mlw... i dunno... i wanna try out... maybe this is the church where i really can learn alot abt god... and build a relationship with Him... i'm trying my best... ok... maybe not my best... but i still need alot of help and encouragement... yeahz... help me along... i can't understand the bible... it is just like lit... chim sia... well.. gtg now.. my sis wants to use the com... so i have to give in to her... idiota... haha... nites....

i'm a rude little girl...

2004-07-28T18:17:00.000+08:00

i'm a rude little girl... i'm bad... nonono... worst... nonono... worsen... haha... what the hell am i typing? well... i have been very rude to my english/home economics teacher... miss seah... i have been toking back to her alot lately... then i scold her the f word and stuff... well... she made me angry first... its not my fault... she is soo damn biased... and she calls me, melissa lynn and meiyu some animal name in hokkien... just because we forgot to write our names on our worksheet... she is soo damn sickening... and she is also very vain... and she complains that we are to vain and wants to snip off melissa's fringe... what the hell... let me snip of urs first ... since you always like to pick on us... then i shall pick on you too... anyway... not many ppl like you too... they all call you names behide your back... like widow and more... i hate you... okok... i know... god says that we should not hate ppl.. but... if you have a teacher like her... wouldn't you hate her too?

yesterday... darius and ivan came to my house for tuition... omg... darius is such a difficult person to teach... totally bad memory... and keep wanting to sleep... lazy ass... well.. ivan... hiaz... smart la... can remember all the formulas... but put all of them in the wrong places... hiaz...

today... while i was walking home... this china man came up to me to ask for directions... then i told him to go straight by pointing in the direction... then he asked... "hui bu hui hen yuan?" and i said... "man yuan de"... omg... i felt so good... my chinese is soo damn pro lor... it came in at the right time... i felt soo proud to be a chinese and singaporean... woo hoo!!!

i'm goin mad soon... i miss ya soo much... and i know you miss me too... or are you just lying to me? or am i lying to myself? i miss ya voice soo much... but i dun dare call you... i'm such a freako... well... anyway.. its impossible between us... so lets just forget abt it and carry on with our lifes...

bad people...

2004-07-21T09:32:00.000+08:00

hiaz... why is everyone soo bad.. why is everyone call me names? i'm soo damn sad now... let me kill myself... but i'm too scared... shit... well.. melissa is playing with me and sammie's hair now... haha.. she must be envying our hair.. wahaha.. you can't blame me for having nice hair... haha... i'm soo damn egoistic... well... maybe thats why people hate me and bryan keeps calling me a monster and pig... shit la... after the people who hate me.. read this.. they will go type more bad things abt me in sammie's bloggy... you shouldn't misuse the tag board... its for you to pass good comments and encouraging things... but you all use it to scold and call people bad names... luckily i dun have one... or else... everyone will be flooding my poor tag board with bad bad stuff... hiaz... i'm so upset... why does everyone hate me that much... well.. nvm.. i still have my mummy... my daddy.. my jie jie and mei mei... and most importantly... smc! yeah! i luv all of you!!! hiaz... things have not been going very well for me... and i am always running out to play... without my mummy's permission... i feel so guilty... especially when she is very worried abt me... she is always worried abt me... well.. anyway.. i promised my mummy.. i wun run out again... i will only go out after asking for permission from her... ain't i a GoOD GIRL!!! haha... copyrighted for melissa lynn.... well give you all a really nice poem...

melissa lynn is a good girl...
chalene is a naughty girl...
samantha is a pretty girl...
melissa lee is a hairy girl...
all of us are GIRLS!!!

haha... i anyhow make one... well... i'm in computer studies now... supposed to do our project.. but i am blogging away.. haha... and the rest... should be on friendster... haha.. everyone loves my blog music... with you... well... i wish i had that feeling.... but everything is goin away.. far far away... love doesn't last forever... love would never come true... love is want people one but can't get... some people have it... but it just doesn't come true... wat the hell... haha... got to go do my project already... mrs cahem scold our grp already...haha...

i'm just trying to protect you...

2004-07-15T17:40:00.000+08:00

omg... why dun you jus get it... he is not a good guy... he is a despo... just like the other acs(b) guys... they are all just after you for your looks... if your not pretty enough or if you are too fat... you are just totally out... and they will never tok to you again... thats was what happened to me... ok? i dun wan it to happen to you all... you are all my frens... it hurts me to see all of all you hurt... why do you all have to get into trouble... and not matter how hard i try to help you all... you just get more and more defient... do you know how hard it is for me? i am always very happy when teacher scolds you... thats becuz i wan you all to learn from it... but you all just dun... you still stay in the toilet and take your own sweet time... can't you just get it straight? everything i do... like scold and nagging at you... is all for your own good... i dun wan you all to turn out like some rebellious kid... maybe you say that you wun but who knows.. what if you do? then at that time... you will regret not listening to me... i am really afraid something bad will happen to you all... thats why i always hold your hands when we cross the road... cuz i know that you wun look out for the cars... i try to protect you all as much as possible... but why do you wan to destroy yourself... hiaz... thats why sometimes i go with other people... thats becuz i get really irritated by your behaviour... your always late for class... talking back to the teacher... breaking the school rules... sometimes i really feel like giving up on you all... but i can't... cuz i know that you all still have a future ahead of you... and i dun wan your behaviour to destroy it all... and also becuz... you all are my best frens... really.. even you melissa... i know i always talk back to you and everything... but i really do luv you all alot... but why do you all not understand what am i trying to do... why do you all always keep things from me... why do you all always not listen to me... why do you all like to complain that i am very naggy... if you really wan me to give up on you all... just tell me... i will try my very best not to care abt you all... but believe me... you all dun know what is happening... you all are still so naive... just listen to me k? i know sometimes... i may say the wrong thing or wat... but i wun ask you all to do any wrong things... i promise... i wun do anything to harm you all... as long as you all trust me... and listen to what i have to say before you all do anything stupid...

i luv all of you...

jessica simpson=with you...

2004-07-14T20:58:00.000+08:00

The real me is a southern girl with her Levis on and an open heart
Wish I could say the save the world, like I was super girl
The real me is to laugh all night lying in the grass just talking about love
But lately I've been jaded life got so complicated

I'm still thinking about it almost forgot what it was like
Do you know what it feels like?
Cause with you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you
Now that I'm with you

You speak and it's like a song
And just like that all my walls come down
It's like a private joke just meant for us to know
I relate to you naturally
Everybody else just fades away
Sometimes it's hard to breathe
Just knowing you found me
Cuz I'm still thinking about it almost forgot what it was like
Do you know what it feels like?
Cause with you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now
Now that I'm with you
With you

Come and take me
Love you save me
Like nobody else
Now I can be myself
With you

With you
I can let my hair down
I can say anything crazy
I know you'll catch me right before I hit the ground
With nothing but a T-shirt on
I never felt so beautiful
Baby as I do now (Baby as I do now)
Now that I'm with you

today... fun? weird? stupid?

2004-07-13T16:53:00.000+08:00

haha... today was quite fun... haha.. dunno why leh... jus think so lor... i feel soo happy lor... haha... jus came back from goin out with jocelyn and ivan... haha... we went to tiong... we were suppose to study lor... but we end up toking... haha... lame lor... haha... i made ivan wait for almost 1 hour... soo sorrie... i had to finish my history first la... graded piece leh... haha... so we jus sat at macs... toked lor... cuz we totally had nth to study... haha... see? we are soo smart... well... then jocelyn realised that she lost $20... and she was kinda upset... wahaha... well... i think school was more fun lor... cuz the two of them jus stare into space lor... haha... today... mr hong.. my science teaher... haha... said that i surely have alot of guys like me one... haha... cuz sammie said that she hated me(joking la)... and mr hong heard... haha... then he set us some assignment... then i turn back to do it with sammie and chantel... then mr hong said:" wah... charlene... samantha said that she hate you... and you still sit with her... ppl like you or hate you... you still sit with them... surely got alot of guys like you one..." i was totally blushing lor... haha... maybe he said that cuz he has a crush on me... wahaha... joking la...i am not that thick skin... wahaha... then during music lesson... we had to practise for our performance for racial harmony day .. which is on monday... haha... then we stand in our places... wahaha... soo funny... i was singing quite loudly lor... then i could hear min ru trying to beat me by singing even louder... haha... and as usual... she went a little bit out of tune... wahaha... today... i wore the wrong uniform by purpose... haha... cuz i was goin out aft sch... and wo hen ai mei de mah... so i didn't want to wear my long long pe skirt out... haha... which was like 12cm under my knees... eeeeeeeee... haha... so i went up to the prefect to let her book me... haha... i soo guai rite? well... then i had to do pe in my uniform... first time leh... soo cool... haha... then i was soo outstanding lor... haha...
i'm still waiting for a guy to drop down from the sky? ooi... up there! drop! quickly drop! haha... dun land on me can liao! haha... i'm lame...

lyrics for 100 years

2004-07-13T16:51:00.000+08:00

I'm 15 for a moment
Caught in between 10 and 20
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
I'm 22 for a moment
She feels better than ever
And we're on fire
Making our way back from Mars
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to lose
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
I'm 33 for a moment
Still the man, but you see I'm a they
A kid on the way
A family on my mind
I'm 45 for a moment
The sea is high
And I'm heading into a crisis
Chasing the years of my life
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy, Time to lose yourself
Within a morning star

15 I'm all right with you
15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live
Half time goes by
Suddenly you’re wise
Another blink of an eye
67 is gone
The sun is getting high
We're moving on...
I'm 99 for a moment
Dying for just another moment
And I'm just dreaming
Counting the ways to where you are
15 there's still time for you
22 I feel her too
33 you’re on your way
Every day's a new day...
15 there's still time for you
Time to buy and time to choose
Hey 15, there's never a wish better than this
When you only got 100 years to live

100years...

2004-07-12T19:47:00.000+08:00

haha... i know how to play this song on the piano... cuz my good fren.. melissa lynn lee... teached me how to play... haha.. even though i forgot some notes liao... haha... i like this song... cuz melissa made me like it... haha... cuz the song very nice... but accidentally in love by counting crows the lyrics are better... haha... especially this line.. " so i said:" i'm a snowball running... running down into the spring that is coming on this love... melting down the blue sky... melting down the sunlight... shimmering love..." haha... i have got some words wrongly... cuz i am not sure of the correct words... so dun come and scold me... haha...

i hope the guy still remembers me... the first guy i held hands with... the first guy who gave me a teddy bear... the guy whom i still remember till now.. the guy whom i met just a few days ago... but he did not seem to remember me... i'm soo sad... even though i do not like him... i still feel this attachment between him and me... cuz i always hug baby to sleep... and baby reminds me of him... baby misses him too... i wonder if he will come back into my life once more... and give me happiness... well.. it wasn't really hapiness... but he was the only guy who made me feel like he was sincerely loving me... and he said that he will love me forever... but i guess i must be just listening to lies... cuz i heard that he just got a gf.. and he does not message me anymore... but never mind.. i can live for 100 years... i'll be waiting for you...

DARIUS PHEE YI RONG!!! you idiot asshole... why are you ignoring me? why do you treat me like i am nth... i hate it ok... i hate .. hate it.. hate it... whats wrong with you... i feel soo sad now.. i wanna cry... but they can't come out... its all ur fault...

its jus another rainy day...

2004-07-12T16:23:00.000+08:00

hiaz... it raining it pouring the old man is snoring... he went to bed and knocked his head.. and could not get up in the morning... wahahaha... nice rhyme... haha... today we had to sing our racial harmony song during assembly in the morning... and we didn't have our songs sheet cuz the idiot teacher kept it for us... and how dare she scold us for not bringing... haha... anyway... so shared it with jocelyn and minru... haha... i was singing and singing but i stopped at the high parts... cuz i did not want to go totally out of tune... haha... then i sang as loud as i dared to la... then minru was trying to sing even louder... and she went out of tune... idiot... xiang gen ben niang tou... xiu xiang pa... =P haha... i admit that she could go quite high but we voice is definitely better than hers.. haha... =P minru... if you are reading this... you can jus come and beat me up later... i wun mind... but just to tell you... i am gonna become still great singer cum actress cum dancer... and you ain't gonna beat me... =P

haha... omg... ivan... your blog soo long... i was soo amazed... you really should do that everytime you blog... well.. at least you went to apologize to your grandma... i dun even know my grandma's b day... and i dun even care... haha... evil... hiaz... stop toking abt me and HIM la... we are over... haha... we haven't even started.. and we are over... haha... well... i already told HIM that our characters dun match la... and i think he will understand lor... so am not gonna be attached for the time being... yeah... single! free! haha... and you... hiaz... dun say until you are like that la... i'm sure got girl like you wan la... actually... if i didn't know andy and liked andy before i knew you... i guess the person i liked would be you... haha... ya... you can start regreting now... wahaha...

i'm suppose to go to the esplanade with HIM... but i am damn tired... how? I really wanna go... but i will have nth to say to HIM... how? he said that if i still wanna go walk walk with him... then i can jus give him a call... do you think i should go... idiot... why is no one answering my qn? well... did you see his nick? it says..."i lyk-ed you... now? i dunno..." crap la he.. do you think he is toking abt me and him? or him and his ex-gf? i feel damn weird lor... he is always keeping his feelings to himself... he does not wanna share it with me... i feel so damn tired trying to find out wat is he trying to say and mean...hiaz...

what i found in lala land...

2004-07-11T12:33:00.000+08:00

omg!!! i had this totally weird dream last nite... or at least just a few hours ago... omg... it had soo many people inside... it had darius... andy.. ivan... my teachers... my whole class... my drama seniors... "my" church frens... it was totally weird... i was totally freaking out when i woke up... if i am not wrong... the first scene was in my new house... and my new house was toally awesome... there was aircon all over the house... and it was soo comfy and the lights were very dim... like in a restaurant... omg... i loved that place... and i finally got close to andy as darius wanted me to... and three of us were on great terms... like three bestfrens... weird... then i was transported to going to school and meeting my drama seniors on the way... and later on reaching school and asking my frens to skip class to go church with me... and the church was like only across our sch... madness... well.. then if ended around there... there was alot more things la... but i can't remember... haha... it was a very cool dream... i need more cool dreams like this... cuz my life is soo damn boring... haha... wow... ivan... this is the second time i am dreaming abt you... ahhhhhh... so damn freaky... maybe cuz you said you will meet me in lala land... well... we really met... but i wonder if did you meet me... haha... well.. i shall jus keep it short for this entry cuz i still need to recover from totally awesome dreams... haha...

i'm bored...

2004-07-10T00:51:00.000+08:00

i'm damn bored... ahhhhhhh... dun feel like doin anything except lying on the bed and day dream.. *YaWnZ* its in the middle of the night and i feel like sleepin soo badly... but alot of people have been complaining that i have not been updating my bloggy... so here i am! wat am i to write? even if i write abt my really private stuff... people will think that i am bragging or lying... well... so i shall jus keep mum abt those stuff..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MELISSA!!! oh yeah! your finally 14!!! your the oldest now... so you better look aft us... your party today was great la... even though it was kinda weird having your relatives there... your cuzins are soo damn cute... yaya... they have your genes... i know that... next it will be sammie's b day... then mel lynn then ME!!! haha... am the youngest!!! =P too bad la.. your all so old... ah ma... haha... sorrie abt ur nelly furtado cd.. i was really short of 30 cents... haha.. ya... pathetic 30 cents... it was soo embarassing lor... having to go up to the counter and find out that your short of 30 cents ONLY!!! ahhhhhhhhhhh... i am soo pathetic...

i wanna be pretty!!! i wanna be slim... but i can't... ahhhhhhh... i tried the strarving myself liao... no use la... i try many things liao... but they all just dun work... i am getting so fed up... why is everyone getting prettier or slimmer... while i am... still me? hiaz... well... ppl always like slimmer gals... or pretty gals... no one likes me... but never mind... i like myself.. even though if i am really fat and really ugly... i will console myself...

oh ya.. alot of ppl have been wondering why i have become Charlene Peh... so i shall just type in here... so you wun keep coming to ask... anyway... i would be too lazy to ans too... here goes... it is cuz i have a god-father... Mr Ivan Peh... so i have to take his surname... haha... i purposely one... haha... i know your not that old... but you are still my little kiddy, crappy, "handsome",piece of shit, why why xiao wang zi, seven-eleven, mr dao, mr sml and many more...

I KnOw yOu hAvE aLwAyS bEeN THeRE FoR mE... ThAts wHy I wIll aLwAyS bE HeRe FoR yOU ToO...*MuaCkS*

2004-07-05T13:56:00.000+08:00

well... ya... i did recieve your mail... wah... first time you write soo long... can you write that long for your bloggy too? haha... well... we will just tok abt it on the 4th august... i think you and me need time to just settle down a little before we come to any rash decisions... especially me... i dun wanna do something wrong again... i dun wanna hurt you nor me again... nice song... i like it alot... just as nice as the rest... i dun think i am gonna reply your mail... cuz i really dunno what to reply... i dunno what to tell you... sorry to do that to you the second time... i really didn't mean it... sorry...

yesterday nite... i slept at almost 5 in the morning... was watching the euro cup finals and accompany darius and andy who was at my house... darius was playing the com and andy was watch the match... i'm sooo upset... portugal lost to greece 0-1... soo ass... i tot portugal will win... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... idiot ppl... next time dun support them liao... well... i had quite alot of fun yesterday... but i kinda dislike Him already... He seems to be this atitude problem guy who sucks to the core... but when we are alone... he is soo damn sweeet and nice... i wonder whats wrong... well.. stopping here today... very short... sorry... haha...

oops i did it again...

2004-07-04T13:50:00.000+08:00

well.. first thing... i didn't mean to do it... i really didn't mean to hurt you again... but you wanted me to tell you... and i said that i will ans all your questions today... it hurts me too... to hurt you like that... a month is really too long... too too long... imagine if i wanted to tok to you... 10 mins aft i just woke up... and i kept wanting to call you... but i just could not... but i really just want the best for you... and if it means forgeting abt you... and having to commit suicide cuz of depresiion(which i have tot of doing)... i think it is really worth it... well... both of us may get hurt... but you will find a better person next time... a girl that is 100% better... and she will too crap with you and share her problems with you... and you will have fun and hapiness with her... you dun really have to bother abt me... i am just some stupid obstacle along your way... you just have to get over it... just like the rest... only aft you get over me... then will you find whats best... ok? just concerntrate on your studies now... you will find a really nice girl when your in poly... and you have to go to poly... no matter what happens... ok? i really do not want to do this... but i guess i have to... i'm sorry if i have chosen the wrong way to go... but the wrong way is the best way for you...

got scolded on a saturday...

2004-07-03T13:17:00.000+08:00

oh my god... how would i know that the stupid syf thingy needs me to be in school by 12:45... how would i know... then does she have to scold me... just because i said that she was the one who told me to report at 2... well.. then she scolded me for not reading the paper... she said to let ur parents read..she didn't say i must read it too... anyway... i lost the paper already... so there is no use... the bus in school... should be leaving in another 5 mins... and i am at home... blogging... ass la.. i dun even know who should i blame... but i know that everyone blames me... so obviously it is my fault... but never mind... i am goin to fetch my sis from sch at 8pm tonite... then i will come home liao... then maybe i can call ivan and tok to him... i was suppose to call him yesterday nite.. at 10pm... but i'm soo sorry... i came home from sammie's house at around 11:45... sorry... hiaz... for this stupid syf thingy... i had to cancel a date with yolanda... soo sad... i wan to go out with her...well... then cause i am not goin to the syf thingy anymore... i can't bring my sister to school... cuz she is goin for the syf thingy too... so i promised her that i will fetch her from sch tonite...well.. i was telling the teacher that maybe i could go on my own... or go with my sis... but they say that is not advisable to go on my own... and they didn't reply me for the "go with my sister" part... i am soo pissed... but well... i am goin out with my baby... suying... i think so... we are still discussing... well.. wat do you think i should where? should i where my nice clothes... or the one i promised myself that i wun wear nice clothes again? hiaz.. but we are goin to orchard... i wanna where my nice clothes... how???

well... i had alot of fun at sammie's house yesterday... that i fell asleep almost immediately when i came home... so i didn't reply ivan's msg... soo sorry... i own you too many apologize liao...hiaz... then i learned how to play a new piano song... 100 years... which mel lynn tot of it herself... she is soo damn smart lor... well.. then we went swimming... and sammie pretended to me ju-on rising from inside the waters... with her hair all down and covering her face... she looked very scary... ahhhhhhhhhh...
then we went to the baths... and sammie keep scarying us... keep screaming and all those stuff... haha... then we went back to the house... had dinner... and we watched " my girl" the girl and the guy soo cute lor... hiaz... jealous... the story also very sad... then aft that we waited for mel lynn;s mom to come... and her mom fetched me to the mrt station... soo nice rite? thank you auntie... well... then i came home... and msged ivan.. then i fell aslp in the process... another sorry... hiaz... gtg now.. suying wants to meet me now... haha.. see ya...